- Jethro Bodine: I'da made it too if I hadn't run into that doggone ol' shark.
- Jed Clampett: Shark? I hear they bites pretty vicious.
- Jethro Bodine: Oh, he got in the first lick. Then I grabbed that rascal and chomped him more ways than trout lays in a barrel.
- Jed Clampett: I'm sorry about the boy. I'd like to say he ain't hisself today, but I'm afraid he is.
- Jethro Bodine: I wish they was here so they could help me unload the truck and fry up a pan of them karate chops.
- Elly May Clampett: [referring to the van] Are Miss Jane and the Grun girls in there?
- Milburn Drysdale: No, they're at the bank.
- Daisy Moses: I suppose you got 'em locked up in the vault.
- Milburn Drysdale: No, I didn't think of it.
- Daisy Moses: What?
- Milburn Drysdale: No, I wouldn't think of it.