The Benny Hill Show (TV Series)

Show 17 (1973)

Benny Hill: Self - Host, Various

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ted Crumble : [from Gather in the Mushrooms]  She fell and knocked the farmer down, sat there on his face./She shouted out, "Where are you?" as she look around the place./She looked down and said, "Why didn't you say something, Farmer Bull?"/He said, "Because it's rude to speak when your mouth is full."

• Ted Crumble : [from Gather in the Mushrooms]  She picked a nice Sweet William to nibble with her lunch,/And then her blouse got caught up on the overhanging branch./Suddenly it tore off as she slithered down the tree./She said, "I've got a lovely pear." He said, "You're telling me."

• Ted Crumble : [from Gather in the Mushrooms]  She climbed right up his pear tree in her miniskirt./Farmer Bull stood underneath in case she should get hurt./She said, "Up here it's gorgeous. There's a lovely view, my dear."/He said, "It ain't as lovely as the view I got down here."

• Ted Crumble : She can have the top off my egg, anytime.

• Harry Fudpucker : I nearly killed her. 1953, two weeks after we'd been married. I nearly killed her. Uncle Louie talked me out of it. He said, "Don't do it, son. You'll get 20 years. Don't do it." I nearly killed her. I was going to kill her. I wouldn't have had this house, Lovelace, the kids or Miriam. I nearly killed her. But what really hurts is that I'd be getting out now!

• little girl dressed up as a witch : Your hands are not soft, they're bloody hard!

• Trudi Van Doorn : Who do you have to sleep with to get off this show?

  Tony Blackburn : If you have a minute, I'll tell you.

• Harry Fudpucker : She says to me, "Harry, you're driving me to my grave." I had the car out in two minutes!