- Barry Zuckerkorn: Those are the pictures?
- Wayne Jarvis: They're all over the news.
- Barry Zuckerkorn: Those are balls.
- Wayne Jarvis: What?
- Narrator: Barry was right. Tobias had inadvertently photographed himself while learning how to use his new camera phone.
- Barry Zuckerkorn: This close, they always look like landscape. But nope, you're looking at balls.
- Lindsay Bluth Fünke: I wonder how many women he's slept with, if any.
- Michael: Lindsay, it's not a competition.
- Lindsay Bluth Fünke: Of course it is, Michael. That's why they call it scoring.
- Michael: Maybe in the '70s.
- Lindsay Bluth Fünke: Really? We've only been doing this for a month.
- Buster: Hey, I just came to tell you that I can't do that wall.
- Drill Instructor: There's no time for that! We're shipping out without you! Haven't you heard?
- [hands Buster military files]
- Buster: Weapons of Mass Destruction?
- Gob: Those bastards!
- Drill Instructor: I did not say that!
- Gob: Are you going to allow that, Buster? Are you going to allow your children, and your children's children, and any children that I might have out there to live in fear for the rest of their lives?
- [advances to the wall]
- Gob: Climb that wall, homo!
- Drill Instructor: Go get 'em!
- Narrator: [as Buster climbs the wall] Buster got the encouragement he needed, and just when it seemed there wouldn't be any surprises...
- [Gob punches Buster as he jumps to the other side]
- Narrator: ... it did.
- Gob: Now, when you do this without getting punched, you'll have more fun.
- Michael: Why haven't you talked to my brother, the new President of the company?
- Wayne Jarvis: We did earlier. He claims to know nothing.
- Michael: Well, that's not an act. He twice tried to heat up a Ding-Dong in a microwave while it was still in its tinfoil.
- Wayne Jarvis: Twice?
- Michael: Two times.
- Lucille Bluth: [Michael is bringing food upstairs] Is that for Lindsey? Because she's not scared to eat in front of me anymore. Those are the whites only, yes?
- Michael: What's wrong with your voice?
- Lindsay Bluth Fünke: [Raspy] Nothing. I've been going out.
- Narrator: Lindsay had been going out frequenting singles clubs, also still hoping to make her open marriage work - which it won't.
- Steve Holt: Your mom seems pretty cool.
- Maebe: That's not my mom.
- Steve Holt: ...but she said you were her daughter.
- Maebe: His daughter. It's my dad.
- Steve Holt: That's a dude?
- Maebe: And the worst part is? He thinks he's passing.