- Slappy Squirrel: [Daniel Boone is attempting to chop down Slappy's home] Hey! You break this tree, and you're gonna pay for it!
- Daniel Boone: Lookie here, you old squirrel, I'm Daniel Boone, the best frontiersman that's ever lived!
- Slappy Squirrel: Well, I'm Slappy Squirrel, and I'm so old my blood is solid.
- Ralph the Guard: Pea, pie, poo, kerplot. I smells Yakko, Wakko and Dot!
- Yakko Warner: Don't you mean "Fee-fi-fo-fum"?
- Ralph the Guard: Yeah, but it don't rhymes with Dot.
- Yakko Warner: Eat them, eat them on a cloud.
- Ralph the Guard: Oh, all right, for crying out loud!
- [takes the plate and swallows the meal]
- Ralph the Guard: Mmmmm! Gold eggs and meat I do not hate.
- Yakko Warner: But now those clouds won't hold your weight.
- Ralph the Guard: Gee, I never thought about that.
- [Ralph falls through the cloud, crashing into the ground bellow]
- Ralph the Guard: Fee-fi-fo-fum, I fall down and hurt my bum.
- Cow Salesman: Okay, tell ya what, I'll give you a bean for that cow.
- Yakko Warner: A bean? A bean? You should be ashamed of yourself. Why, she's worth at least, uh... three beans.
- Cow Salesman: Deal.
- Magic Harp: Hello. Please save me!
- Yakko Warner, Wakko Warner: Hello, harp!
- Yakko Warner: She's a dream.
- Wakko Warner: She's a princess.
- Dot Warner: She's a woman with a harp stuck to her back. Boys...
- Yakko Warner: [rhyming à la Dr. Suess] I'm sure you'll love this, have a seat. Here's your meal, gold eggs and meat.
- Ralph the Guard: I does not like gold eggs and meat, It's you who I would like to eat.
- Skippy Squirrel: How come we're making so many candles, Aunt Slappy?
- Slappy Squirrel: Skippy, it's the 1700s. What'd you expect, rollerblading?
- Daniel Boone: Kentucky at last! I'm gonna build me a little log cabin right here. The a log cabin for my oxes. Then a summer cabin. The only thing I love more then buildin' cabins is choppin' down trees.
- [begins hacking some down]
- Daniel Boone: Birch is good for clothespins. This oak'll make a dandy shelf. Well, I'll be kissed by a wolverine, a bessemer elm! That's the best wood around for makin' a front door.
- Tom Dover, Dick Dover, Larry Dover: [singing] Daniel Boone was a big dang bird. Yes, a really big bird. But he didn't know that his disguise was pretty absurd.
- Daniel Boone: QUIET! You dadgum idiots. This is a dang good disguise. Heh heh heh, that old squirrel will think I'm just a big woodpecker. I'll peck down this tree right in front of her.
- Slappy Squirrel: Ah, there's no rest for the elderly. Hey! Are you Daniel Boone?
- Daniel Boone: Shoot, no. I'm a big woodpecker.
- Slappy Squirrel: Get out of here with that woodpecker thing, there. You're Boone!
- Daniel Boone: No, I ain't. My daddy was a big woodpecker and his daddy before him. Can't you see I'm-a peckin' at your tree for bugs and such?
- Slappy Squirrel: I guess you really are a big woodpecker.
- Daniel Boone: Dang straight.
- Slappy Squirrel: Then here, I made you some woodpecker lunch.
- [reveals a plate full of rotting dead insects]
- Daniel Boone: That's... right neighborly of you, ma'am.
- Slappy Squirrel: Yeah, there's nothin' like dead bugs mixed with manure and served with a big piece of rotten bark, eh woody?
- [Daniel runs off gagging]
- Tom Dover, Dick Dover, Larry Dover: [singing] Daniel Boone was a great big guy. Yes, a big sick guy. He lost his lunch all over the trees and sky.
- Slappy Squirrel: That's nice singin'. They remind me of "Up With People".
- Tom Dover, Dick Dover, Larry Dover: [singing] Daniel Boone was a great big jerk. Yes, a stupid jerk. He had another dumb plan that more than likely wouldn't work.
- Daniel Boone: That ties it! You boys are fired! Come on down from there and get!
- Tom Dover: Hey, what's the big idea? You can't just fire us!
- Dick Dover: Yeah, who do you think you are? Hey, we got rights, you know! Wait a second!
- Larry Dover: We have a contract!
- Tom Dover: Our agent said two weeks work.
- Tom Dover, Dick Dover, Larry Dover: [All arguing at once]
- Daniel Boone: I said get! I'm gonna blow this here tree and that old squirrel sky-high! And I don't need no dang smart-aleck chorus! If'n I can't have that tree, then nobody's gonna have it.
- [cackles]
- Daniel Boone: Now there's gonna be a big hole in the ground. I could make it into a root cellar or a... root cellar.
- Slappy Squirrel: And remember to start your day with Branimaniacs, for that get up and go feeling!
- Slappy Squirrel: [They both eat the cereal, and get stomach aches]
- Skippy Squirrel: I gotta get up and go.
- Slappy Squirrel: I'll race ya!
- Skippy Squirrel: [looking at branimaniacs box] Wow! We're on the box!
- Slappy Squirrel: That's right, kiddo.
- Skippy Squirrel: Do we get paid for that?
- Slappy Squirrel: You don't!
- Yakko, Wakko, Dot: [singing to the theme song] Eat Branimaniacs / Nutritionally it lacks / But this cereal attacks, all of your digestive tracks / it's branimainy...
- Slappy Squirrel: My stomach's in painy...
- Yakko, Wakko, Dot: Branimaniacs!
- Yakko Warner: [after being rewarded with five beans and Merv Griffin's autograph] Doesn't anyone ever get cash in fairytales?
- Magic Harp: If you rescue me, you'll be greatly rewarded. I'll give you four beans and a goose!
- Yakko Warner: [Sarcastically] How lucky can we get?