The Andy Griffith Show (TV Series)

High Noon in Mayberry (1963)

Don Knotts: Barney Fife

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sheriff Andy Taylor : [Andy and Barney are discussing the "threatening" letter from the recently released ex-con whom Andy shot in the leg during a filling station holdup when the phone rings]  Hello, Sheriff's Office... Oh, yes! Ms. Peterson! Aww... Well, I'll take care of it right away... Yes, Ma'am. 'Bye.

  [Hangs up the phone] 

  Sheriff Andy Taylor : Ms. Peterson's "Fluffy" is on the roof again.

  Deputy Barney Fife : This is a time for pussycats? With a killer on the loose?

  Sheriff Andy Taylor : Well, Fluffy's got kittens and you know how you'd feel seeing your mother on the roof.

  Deputy Barney Fife : [Follows Andy to the door as he's leaving and takes his gun from the holster and tries to get Andy to take it]  Andy, take this. Put it under your shirt.

  Sheriff Andy Taylor : I won't need it, Barn. Fluffy and I've been friends for years!

• Sheriff Andy Taylor : [Billy Ray is delivering mail to the courthouse]  I'll take it, Billy Ray.

  Billy Ray, the Postman : Oh, no, you don't! The mail must go through!

  Sheriff Andy Taylor : But I'm standing right here! Hand it to me, Billy Ray!

  Billy Ray, the Postman : You're not an authorized receptacle!

  Deputy Barney Fife : But he's an official of this county!

  Billy Ray, the Postman : Means nothin' to me! I'm a Fed!

  Deputy Barney Fife : Wait until you park that mail truck of yours in an illegal spot some time!

  Billy Ray, the Postman : As long as I'm carryin' registered mail, I got the right-of-way over ambulance, police cars, fire engines and heavier-than-air craft!

  Deputy Barney Fife : Put a mail sack on some people, goes right to their heads!

• Barney Fife : [stationing Gomer and Otis outside Andy's home]  Now, remember! If anything suspicious happens, you call me!

  Gomer Pyle : Right. Hey, Barn? I ain't got no phone out here.

  Barney Fife : You civilians just don't know how to think on your feet, do you?

• Barney Fife : [aiming to swear in Otis and Gomer as deputies]  I realize that some of ya have family responsibilities and if for that reason, or any other, you feel this mission is too dangerous and you wanna pull out, all right. You're free to walk right out that door!

  [Barney closes his eyes, lowers his head and stands there, pointing at the courthouse door] 

  Barney Fife : [Otis and Gomer slowly look at each other, then Otis, followed by Gomer, head for the door] 

  Barney Fife : HOLD IT! Get... back... here!

  [Gomer and Otis sadly comply] 

  Barney Fife : Now, you get them hands up! You're both gonna be deputies whether you like it or not!