The Andy Griffith Show (TV Series)
Barney's First Car (1963)
Andy Griffith: Andy Taylor
Photos
Quotes
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Barney Fife : The last big buy I made was my mom's and dad's anniversary present.
Andy Taylor : What'd ya get 'em?
Barney Fife : Septic tank.
Andy Taylor : For their anniversary?
Barney Fife : Yeah. Oh, they're really hard to buy for! Besides, it was something they could use. They were really thrilled. Two tons of concrete, all steel reinforced!
Andy Taylor : You're a fine son, Barn.
Barney Fife : Well, I try.
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Thelma Lou : I smell gas. Do you smell gas, Andy?
Andy Taylor : I smell gas.
Opie Taylor : I smell gas!
Gomer Pyle : I smell gas!
Aunt Bee Taylor : I smell gas, too!
Barney Fife : All right! All right! All right! You smell gas! 'Course you smell gas! What do you think this car runs on, coal?
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Barney Fife : All right, is everybody set back there?
Opie Taylor : I'm all set!
Aunt Bee Taylor : I'm all set.
Gomer Pyle : I'm all set.
Barney Fife : How 'bout the front seat?
Thelma Lou : I'm all set.
Andy Taylor : I'm all set.
Gomer Pyle : Hope I don't get carsick.
Barney Fife : [quickly but insistently] Opie, you trade places with Gomer! I want him near a window!
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Barney Fife : [as his passengers sing "Old MacDonald Had a Farm"] Wait a minute! Hold it, everybody! Listen!
[everyone quiets down and bumping sounds are heard]
Andy Taylor : Just bumps on the road.
Thelma Lou : What it sounds like to me.
Gomer Pyle : It's just bumps on the road.
Aunt Bee Taylor : That's what it sounds like to me.
Opie Taylor : Me, too.
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Andy Taylor : [to Barney] You're welcome to use the patrol car any time you like.
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Andy Taylor : [to Barney] It wouldn't be an insult. It would be business.