- Archie Bunker: You just take very good care of Gloria and Joseph.
- Michael 'Meathead' Stivic: Those are two things you never have to worry about, Arch.
- Edith Bunker: Oh Gloria, your father is so mad now, I don't think he'd go to California even to see John Wayne.
- Edith Bunker: Hello Reverend Chong. You remember my husband, Archie Bunker.
- Rev. Chong: Yes.
- Archie Bunker: Oh yeah, yeah, you're the guy that refused to Baptize Joey behind their backs.
- Rev. Chong: I, Archibald, give you this ring.
- Archie Bunker: Oh hold, hold it. Do you mind? I Archie, huh? Alright, what?
- Rev. Chong: give you this ring
- Archie Bunker: give you this ring, what?
- Rev. Chong: as a symbol of my vow.
- Archie Bunker: as a, what?
- Rev. Chong: symbol of my vow
- Archie Bunker: symbol of my, what?
- Rev. Chong: vow
- Archie Bunker: vow
- Archie Bunker: Is that alright there, Reverend Ching.
- Michael 'Meathead' Stivic: Chang.
- Rev. Chong: Chong.
- Archie Bunker: Whatever.
- Rev. Chong: Do you, Archibald, take Edith to be your lawful wedded wife?
- Archie Bunker: [sighs]
- Edith Bunker: Archie.
- Archie Bunker: Give me a minute, will ya.
- Edith Bunker: But Arch...
- Archie Bunker: Alright, it's only a joke, a joke. It's a joke.
- Rev. Chong: Well... do you or don't you?
- Archie Bunker: I do. Get off my back.
- Archie Bunker: Stop nagging, Edith.
- Edith Bunker: I didn't say a word.
- Archie Bunker: That's the worst kind of nagging.
- Archie Bunker: [Archie muttering to Edith when Reverend Chong breaks out a small camera at the conclusion of the ceremony to take their picture] You never see an Oriental without a camera.