"Heute fängt mein Leben an", which means "Today my life begins", is a German television film from 2006, so really not a new movie anymore by any definition and it will have its 15th anniversary next year. The alternate title was "Hand aufs Herz", a choice that says absolutely nothing about the contents of the film, but at least would have been less pretentious. The lead actress is female and same applies to the writer and the director. The latter is Christine Kabisch and her body of work is really bad and the fact that she is working on "Rote Rosen" now in her mid-60s implies that there is not a great deal of talent to her body of work. Writer Silke Zertz's career efforts are only mildly better, but probably still not as much on failure territory as Kabisch's. The lead actress of these 1.5 hours is Christiane Hörbiger and she is not only part of an acting dynasty, but has also been for many, many decades part of the industry. So just like with Kabisch, it is pretty sad that this degree of quality we have here (or lack thereof) is what she ends up with now. She is in her early 80s now, back then was in her late 60s. And 100% the center of the story. Still prolific German film viewers will maybe recognize a few more names, or at least faces in here, such as Zich, Kreye, von Pufendorf and maybe Engel as well. Nobody really outstanding, although Engel's looks were kinda outstanding. But this alone can obviously not make up for this film never being an inspired watch from any perspective. The sad thing is they were 100% serious with this and acted as if they were portraying great emotions, considerable depth and an authentic story. The opposite is the case. This film is a extremely weak and I probably only give it two stars out of ten because I never hand out one, but then again, it can also be said that Studio Hamburg Filmproduktion has done worse on several occasions, even if admittedly not as many times as the shoddy ARD Degeto. Not sure if they were a part of this as well. I think not.
NNow, let me give you a few specific examples on how this film sucked. The best example is really how everybody, absolutely everybody, here is depicted as despicable and not on the same level character-wise compared to our likeable heroine, who basically lived her life for others though, for people who did not treat her the way she deserved and this is basically the core message from start to finish here. She would have deserved better and now she has every right to stand up and do her thing. I feel bad for (female) audiences honestly who think this is an authentic story about putting your priorities first because these ladies probably have not been treated well either, but then again, perhaps if they are really stupid enough to see everything that is depicted here as credible and authentic story. There is so much wrong with it I could impossibly get it all in before the character limit hits. But I will now really give a few examples. As for the characters, it is absolutely ridiculous how the daughter and husband (ex-husband) all of a sudden site with the main character again in the end. They seemed so different before. The daughter is all caring all of a sudden and the man's new relationship turned out too demanding for him and he even wants her back. What? Of course, Hörbiger's character is now really confident and says no only to make out with the local priest or something (well, head of the local choir) moments later. That was really so bad that it was hilarious again. The epitome of a ridiculously over-the-top happy ending that includes zero realism and only exists the please the densest of all audiences. There was a lot before that too. The pregnancy story with the daughter and how it eventually turns out that the alleged father is not even the father is a joke too and not a good one. That much is safe. And it is not just the key plots, but also the minor moments, like how daddy is in the house when mother returns to get something. Or how the protagonist changes all her plans 100% at the end again because she now is a grandma. Or how her daughter all of a sudden found a job and is about to lead a normal life now. And talks like a grateful daughter all of a sudden. But yeah, I mentioned this before. Another very minor moment is the guy who reads the old woman's last will and testament and our protagonist who has been working so hard for her mother-in-law gets nothing but a worthless collection of flutes. There you are again supposed to feel sorry for the main character, but I just had to laugh because it was so clumsy how they were going for emotions there, also with the guy who reads said will and testament not able to read it immediately, but he first has to get his glasses in the right place. Pseudo drama and the creation of a tense moment that I have never really seen weaker. Finally, annother moment when this film hits rock bottom is the random inclusion of a Sugababes song to emphasize the mental state and situation from one key character and it feels so fake that I cannot even put it into words. Alright, that shall be all. You get the message. Fat thumbs-down. Highly not recommended.
NNow, let me give you a few specific examples on how this film sucked. The best example is really how everybody, absolutely everybody, here is depicted as despicable and not on the same level character-wise compared to our likeable heroine, who basically lived her life for others though, for people who did not treat her the way she deserved and this is basically the core message from start to finish here. She would have deserved better and now she has every right to stand up and do her thing. I feel bad for (female) audiences honestly who think this is an authentic story about putting your priorities first because these ladies probably have not been treated well either, but then again, perhaps if they are really stupid enough to see everything that is depicted here as credible and authentic story. There is so much wrong with it I could impossibly get it all in before the character limit hits. But I will now really give a few examples. As for the characters, it is absolutely ridiculous how the daughter and husband (ex-husband) all of a sudden site with the main character again in the end. They seemed so different before. The daughter is all caring all of a sudden and the man's new relationship turned out too demanding for him and he even wants her back. What? Of course, Hörbiger's character is now really confident and says no only to make out with the local priest or something (well, head of the local choir) moments later. That was really so bad that it was hilarious again. The epitome of a ridiculously over-the-top happy ending that includes zero realism and only exists the please the densest of all audiences. There was a lot before that too. The pregnancy story with the daughter and how it eventually turns out that the alleged father is not even the father is a joke too and not a good one. That much is safe. And it is not just the key plots, but also the minor moments, like how daddy is in the house when mother returns to get something. Or how the protagonist changes all her plans 100% at the end again because she now is a grandma. Or how her daughter all of a sudden found a job and is about to lead a normal life now. And talks like a grateful daughter all of a sudden. But yeah, I mentioned this before. Another very minor moment is the guy who reads the old woman's last will and testament and our protagonist who has been working so hard for her mother-in-law gets nothing but a worthless collection of flutes. There you are again supposed to feel sorry for the main character, but I just had to laugh because it was so clumsy how they were going for emotions there, also with the guy who reads said will and testament not able to read it immediately, but he first has to get his glasses in the right place. Pseudo drama and the creation of a tense moment that I have never really seen weaker. Finally, annother moment when this film hits rock bottom is the random inclusion of a Sugababes song to emphasize the mental state and situation from one key character and it feels so fake that I cannot even put it into words. Alright, that shall be all. You get the message. Fat thumbs-down. Highly not recommended.