"Ich schenk dir einen Seitensprung" is a German television film from 2002, so in October 2022 (slightly over 1.5 years now) this one will have its 20th anniversary and for some strange reason that I cannot understand, it is still shown on national television nowadays so many years later. The title can be translated "I allow you to cheat once". It sounds a bit clumsy, but there is no effotless way to translate "Seitensprung" as one word, so this is the best we get, even if I hesitate to use the word "best" for anything linked to this movie. It was an embarrassing watch from beginning to end really. May sound harsh, but it's true. Let's stay with the basics for now: Andreas Föhr is the writer here. He usually focused on series and episodes, so this film is a bit of an exception for his body of work. Nothing of quality to see there though. Zwei am großen See, Im Namen des Gesetzes, Der Bulle vön Tölz and, most of all, In aller Freundschaft are prefect examples of very uninspired shows. And his film projects are not any better as we see from this one here. The show I mentioned last by the way Föhr wrote as "Andrea Föhr". Very creative really. Föhr has worked together for a long, long time with Thomas Letocha and basically each credit one of them has, the other got as well. So props to them for not solving each others mistakes, but bringing out the worst in each other apparently. Director is Dominikus Probst. Never heard of the man either although he has been directing since the early 1990s already, so for a decade back then when this got made and for almost 30 years now. No surprise though because the likes of Lindenstraße, Die Stein and Verbotene Liebe and a few others are the exact opposite of quality entertainment for the small screen, even if the simple-minded will disagree. So you can say that the director fits the writers here in terms of absence of inspiration and what fits even better is that this is another Degeto Bavaria Film movie and these almost always have absence of quality written all over them.
Next, let me elaborate a bit on the cast of this slightly under 1.5-hour film. There are cast members in here that are also still somewhat known today, maybe even famous. This certainly applies to Austrian actress Muriel Baumeister who you see on the right of the photo. I may be a bit biased when it comes to her because I always found her stunning, but I think she was not half as bad as the two guys in this movie, especially Markus Knüfken, who was really limited and cringeworthy in here. He is the guy you see on the left. The other one would be Dominique Horwitz. He was born in France, but really since launching his career as a 20-year-old he has played in German films mostly. Many of them are as bad as this one here. This trio in general does not exactly have bodies of work where you would get jealous and that is a really nice way to put it. Horwitz made the headlines not too long ago because of a traffic accident, bike accident I think, but he recovered quickly to go on with his stage show if it took place or if the pandemic got in the way. Don't remember exactly. But I do remember some politically correct statements from him too and I think actors should stay out of stuff like that, but as he appeared in films like this, I am not surprised he did. As for the supporting cast, Medvedeva I am not familiar with at all, but no surprise with her name she also has some Russian movies in her filmography, mostly German though. Henriette Heinze I remember from her role for which she won a German Film Awards two or three years before this film and it is pretty sad that, after such a success and a really good film, she had to star in stuff like that next and play really insignificant characters. You can check out the rest of the cast's bodies of works if you care. Several actors like Neubauer have been pretty prolific too. Schlattner is not unattractive either, some beautiful women in this film, but this alone does not make it a good watch with the atrocious writing overall.
If you take a look at the title, then you already know you are in for a really bad movie here, especially because how they did not even follow up with it. These words are a statement from Knüfken's character, but when the female protagonist really wants to go through with it, he starts following her and basically takes it back. The entire premise of how it happened was so unrealistic already. Like he bought an entire bouquet of roses, wanted to propose to his significant other and boom what happens? A woman shows up and tells the this very moment that she had sex on one occasion with him when the two were already a couple. Yeah, right. Not unrealistic at all. In order to continue with the usual ARD Degeto misandry, we also have the female protagonist's best friend there and she finds out minutes later that her new big love is engaged and enjoyed it for what it was and will now return to his fiancée. I am not sure what was more cringeworthy there, the mere inclusion of all this or the background how she says that she has no secrets with her best friend and so Baumeister's character gets to stay with her this awkward moment and so do we. This was all basically in the first ten or fifteen minutes and by then, I already knew that it would be a genuinely terrible movie. Okay, I admit it. I kinda knew already when I read the title. Things don't really get any better when said title comes into play. How Baumeister's character could have sex with some hunky guys there, but she doesn't want to is as embarrassing to watch as the scene in which she really gets closer to Horwitz's character. Or especially the day after when he is still around and the chaos that ensues when Knüfken's character comes home much earlier than expected. This was all supposed to be awkwardly funny, but it was just cringeworthy and embarrassing to watch.
It is tough to really decide about what was the worst from this film. Too much to pick from. I still think the ending, the last ten minutes or so, are a true contender. What do we see there? Marriage stuff. Or wedding stuff in fact. There is an elderly character in this film who adds absolutely nothing at all and at some point says something like how she hopes that an older mail character will propose to her and she has been waiting for this for such a long time. And this was used I guess to show us that Knüfken is really a likable fella despite what he did as he ends up making it clear to said guy and he proposes and the two get married. This is really all they do in this film. Near the end, there is this wedding scene and Knüfken's character is there and realizes there is another wedding he should be at and where he should be interfering because now he realizes that Baumeister's character is the one and only for him. Sure thing. So these weddings take place at the exact same time and we are supposed to believe that all of a sudden Baumeister's character would marry Horwitz's? Within days or so? What is this nonsense. It was already stupid enough with the older guys that they weren't even in a romantic relationship, but spotaneously decide to get married right away. But for the young ones, it is even bigger nonsense. Like this is nt the 1950s or something. No clue what's wrong with people. How do screenplays like this even get accepted and shown on national television. Unreal. This is where your GEZ money goes, folks. And as for the next moment and twist of events, we find out that the woman who is the bride is not Baumeister's character, but the Russian barkeeper girl. I don't even. She was not in a relationship with Horwitz's character either and he always said that he loved Baumeister's character. This is just beyond good and evil here what the filmmakers were throwing at us. Unreal stuff. I mean Degeto messed up on so many occasions, but as bad as things got here in the last fifteen or twenty minutes, they rarely get as bad as they did there. Still, it as gruesome foreshadowing as they kept throwing hundreds of films at audiences in the next fifteen years or so, even today, just not as often, and the aspects these films have in common are the ruthless misandry, the highly unrealistic happy endings and the complete lack or artistic impact.
This is pretty much it. Just some more brainstorming. Another really cringeworthy scene here would be the exposure scene when it comes out that it was Horwitz's character because the moment the two women there show up out of nowhere was so pathetic to watch. Again, meant to be slightly funny. Knüfken also showed some really bad acting in this scene. Indirectly linked to that, you can also name the earlier scene in which it seems that Knüfken's character knew already, but turned out he didn't. The words he said there that led Horwitz's character to thinking he knows, just like the other guy who shows up and saw Horwitz's character with the girl were also on the very embarrassing side. I could probably mention another dozen scenes and inclusions where this film hit rock bottom, but I guess you are getting the message anyway. So is there something to take from this film? Probably not. The only good thing is that they did not make a sequel (I think) or took it as a basis for a series even. It was unwatchable on many occasions and still weak in its better moments compared to other stuff. Absolutely skip the outcome here and this really should not be shown anymore at all. A travesty of a movie, especially at the very end, like why does nobody from the crowd say something when he clearly states a female first name that is not the bride's? Why does Baumeister's character not interfere earlier? Yes, sir, you indeed acted like an idiot in front of everybody and with that I do not mean the wedding guests, but everybody seeing this film. Also I just cannot take Horwitz seriously whatsoever as somebody supposed to be a cool and handsome character. It's impossible. Highly not recommended.
Next, let me elaborate a bit on the cast of this slightly under 1.5-hour film. There are cast members in here that are also still somewhat known today, maybe even famous. This certainly applies to Austrian actress Muriel Baumeister who you see on the right of the photo. I may be a bit biased when it comes to her because I always found her stunning, but I think she was not half as bad as the two guys in this movie, especially Markus Knüfken, who was really limited and cringeworthy in here. He is the guy you see on the left. The other one would be Dominique Horwitz. He was born in France, but really since launching his career as a 20-year-old he has played in German films mostly. Many of them are as bad as this one here. This trio in general does not exactly have bodies of work where you would get jealous and that is a really nice way to put it. Horwitz made the headlines not too long ago because of a traffic accident, bike accident I think, but he recovered quickly to go on with his stage show if it took place or if the pandemic got in the way. Don't remember exactly. But I do remember some politically correct statements from him too and I think actors should stay out of stuff like that, but as he appeared in films like this, I am not surprised he did. As for the supporting cast, Medvedeva I am not familiar with at all, but no surprise with her name she also has some Russian movies in her filmography, mostly German though. Henriette Heinze I remember from her role for which she won a German Film Awards two or three years before this film and it is pretty sad that, after such a success and a really good film, she had to star in stuff like that next and play really insignificant characters. You can check out the rest of the cast's bodies of works if you care. Several actors like Neubauer have been pretty prolific too. Schlattner is not unattractive either, some beautiful women in this film, but this alone does not make it a good watch with the atrocious writing overall.
If you take a look at the title, then you already know you are in for a really bad movie here, especially because how they did not even follow up with it. These words are a statement from Knüfken's character, but when the female protagonist really wants to go through with it, he starts following her and basically takes it back. The entire premise of how it happened was so unrealistic already. Like he bought an entire bouquet of roses, wanted to propose to his significant other and boom what happens? A woman shows up and tells the this very moment that she had sex on one occasion with him when the two were already a couple. Yeah, right. Not unrealistic at all. In order to continue with the usual ARD Degeto misandry, we also have the female protagonist's best friend there and she finds out minutes later that her new big love is engaged and enjoyed it for what it was and will now return to his fiancée. I am not sure what was more cringeworthy there, the mere inclusion of all this or the background how she says that she has no secrets with her best friend and so Baumeister's character gets to stay with her this awkward moment and so do we. This was all basically in the first ten or fifteen minutes and by then, I already knew that it would be a genuinely terrible movie. Okay, I admit it. I kinda knew already when I read the title. Things don't really get any better when said title comes into play. How Baumeister's character could have sex with some hunky guys there, but she doesn't want to is as embarrassing to watch as the scene in which she really gets closer to Horwitz's character. Or especially the day after when he is still around and the chaos that ensues when Knüfken's character comes home much earlier than expected. This was all supposed to be awkwardly funny, but it was just cringeworthy and embarrassing to watch.
It is tough to really decide about what was the worst from this film. Too much to pick from. I still think the ending, the last ten minutes or so, are a true contender. What do we see there? Marriage stuff. Or wedding stuff in fact. There is an elderly character in this film who adds absolutely nothing at all and at some point says something like how she hopes that an older mail character will propose to her and she has been waiting for this for such a long time. And this was used I guess to show us that Knüfken is really a likable fella despite what he did as he ends up making it clear to said guy and he proposes and the two get married. This is really all they do in this film. Near the end, there is this wedding scene and Knüfken's character is there and realizes there is another wedding he should be at and where he should be interfering because now he realizes that Baumeister's character is the one and only for him. Sure thing. So these weddings take place at the exact same time and we are supposed to believe that all of a sudden Baumeister's character would marry Horwitz's? Within days or so? What is this nonsense. It was already stupid enough with the older guys that they weren't even in a romantic relationship, but spotaneously decide to get married right away. But for the young ones, it is even bigger nonsense. Like this is nt the 1950s or something. No clue what's wrong with people. How do screenplays like this even get accepted and shown on national television. Unreal. This is where your GEZ money goes, folks. And as for the next moment and twist of events, we find out that the woman who is the bride is not Baumeister's character, but the Russian barkeeper girl. I don't even. She was not in a relationship with Horwitz's character either and he always said that he loved Baumeister's character. This is just beyond good and evil here what the filmmakers were throwing at us. Unreal stuff. I mean Degeto messed up on so many occasions, but as bad as things got here in the last fifteen or twenty minutes, they rarely get as bad as they did there. Still, it as gruesome foreshadowing as they kept throwing hundreds of films at audiences in the next fifteen years or so, even today, just not as often, and the aspects these films have in common are the ruthless misandry, the highly unrealistic happy endings and the complete lack or artistic impact.
This is pretty much it. Just some more brainstorming. Another really cringeworthy scene here would be the exposure scene when it comes out that it was Horwitz's character because the moment the two women there show up out of nowhere was so pathetic to watch. Again, meant to be slightly funny. Knüfken also showed some really bad acting in this scene. Indirectly linked to that, you can also name the earlier scene in which it seems that Knüfken's character knew already, but turned out he didn't. The words he said there that led Horwitz's character to thinking he knows, just like the other guy who shows up and saw Horwitz's character with the girl were also on the very embarrassing side. I could probably mention another dozen scenes and inclusions where this film hit rock bottom, but I guess you are getting the message anyway. So is there something to take from this film? Probably not. The only good thing is that they did not make a sequel (I think) or took it as a basis for a series even. It was unwatchable on many occasions and still weak in its better moments compared to other stuff. Absolutely skip the outcome here and this really should not be shown anymore at all. A travesty of a movie, especially at the very end, like why does nobody from the crowd say something when he clearly states a female first name that is not the bride's? Why does Baumeister's character not interfere earlier? Yes, sir, you indeed acted like an idiot in front of everybody and with that I do not mean the wedding guests, but everybody seeing this film. Also I just cannot take Horwitz seriously whatsoever as somebody supposed to be a cool and handsome character. It's impossible. Highly not recommended.
