Cedric The Entertainer: Constable
Photos
Quotes
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The Detective : [to Violet] Little girl, the big cage door is open. No snake. Dead guy. You know what I'm thinking? I'm thinking, "Who woke me up at nine in the morning for this?"
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The Critic : So, you wanna get some Chinese after the show?
The Detective : Yeah, let's get them!
The Critic : I meant food.
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[after Count Olaf's plan to legally marry Violet during "The Marvelous Marriage" is revealed]
Mr. Poe : You unspeakable cad! Arrest him!
The Detective : For what?
Mr. Poe : For being a greedy monster!
Count Olaf : Oh... I'm the monster? *I'm* the monster?
[grins evilly]
Count Olaf : *You're* the monster. These children tried to warn you, but you wouldn't listen. No one ever listens to children! You think you're innocent? You're accomplices! This certificate says that I have the fortune now! And there's nothing you can do about it!
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Violet Baudelaire : He's Count Olaf and he tried to kill us with a train!
The Detective : Where is this man gonna get a train?
Count Olaf : [as Stephano] Where am I gonna get a train?
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The Detective : I thought I knew avant garde.
The Critic : I thought I knew avant garde.
The Detective : I know Avant Johnson.
The Critic : You know Avant Johnson? I used to shave his grandmother.
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Mr. Poe : Count Olaf? What are you doing here?
The Detective : Please, Mr. Poe.
[to Olaf]
The Detective : Count Olaf, what are you doing here, man?
