About 45 minutes into this far-too-long 100-minute film, I kept looking at the screen, wondering why I was still watching people who apparently have modelled their adult lives and language on 'Friends,' that @#$%^&* sitcom-cum-show.
Director Nina Davenport and other ditzy, whiny women think getting married, with flowing white gowns and all the usual rituals firmly in place, is the beginning and end of paradise on earth. For me, listening to the excruciating conversations of these women, who talk like acne-ridden 9th graders when they're actually in their late 20s or early 30s, is just too much to take. And I thought MEN were supposed to be shallow.
Davenport is a rather sad wedding photographer (ah, coincidence) who thinks that maybe she's never going to get married. Somehow this creaky premise is supposed to translate into a heavy-duty feature-length film. If you think it does, you'll love this stuff.
'Always a Bridesmaid' is really a great to-do about not very much. The second half of the film, where loneliness among older people is examined with sensitivity, is far more interesting than the first, but as a whole I'm not sure how these kinds of docs get financed, made and distributed. Too much is spent on the musings of a woman who thinks it's compelling for us to listen to her inanity ('...but it feels kind of good to wallow in my own sadness'). It gets worse with the flat-out illiterate musings of her boyfriend ('So like, ya know, like, do ya think, like, do ya, like, think, like, that should we, like, do that, like, or like, should we....'). If you love the English language, avoid this flick.
Too many deluded filmmakers assume that the quivering masses will be interested in their insufferably middle-class lives, which they somehow equate with high drama.
I've been constipated for the last four days. Think I'll make a film about it. It has tremendous dramatic potential.