Robin Laing credited as playing...
Edward J. (Babe) Heffron
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: [a tree has fallen on Babe's foxhole] Hey, Sarge, ya think I overdid it on the cover for my foxhole?
- Donald Malarkey: [the men are going over Heffron and Spina's run-in with the German in the foxhole] He shoulda shot Hinkel in the ass.
- Warren Muck: Then he woulda shot *him* in the ass.
- [the men start laughing]
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: [Domingus comes around with stale pancakes and shovels them into everyone's mess tin] Hey, God bless ya.
- Donald Malarkey: Joe, these smell like my armpit!
- Warren Muck: [holding up one of the pancakes] At least your armpit's warm.
- Joe Domingus: You want syrup with that?
- Donald Malarkey: Joe, be honest, what's in these things anyway, huh?
- Joe Domingus: Nothing you won't eat, Malarkey.
- [he walks away]
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: I won't eat Malarkey.
- [they all start laughing again]
- Pvt. John T. Julian: Hey, hey, maybe Hinkel would like your share, huh?
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: I shoulda shot him when I had the chance.
- Warren Muck: What, running backwards, Babe?
- 2nd Lt. Thomas Peacock: [Lt. Peacock walks up] Anybody seen Lieutenant Dike?
- Donald Malarkey: Uh, try battalion CP, sir.
- [Peacock walks away, and the men start giggling once he is out of earshot]
- Warren Muck: Try Paris.
- Donald Malarkey: Try Hinkel.
- [they all crack up again]
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: [Spina puts on a bad German accent and makes to hug Heffron] Hinkel, sveetie, I'm home!
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: [Heffron turns to Doc Roe, who is sitting nearby] Hey Eugene, Lieutenant Dike's got a full aid kit, try him.
- Donald Malarkey: Yeah, I'm sure he's not usin' his.
- [the men laugh again]
- Pvt. John T. Julian: Maybe Hinkel's got a syrette for ya.
- Warren Muck: Eat your strudel.
- Donald Malarkey: [in his own bad German accent] Hey, Hinkel-Vinkel, eat ze armpit, huh?
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: [Spina and Heffron get lost in the woods of Bastogne while looking for medical supplies] Hey Babe... where the hell are we?
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: [Heffron stops and looks around] This way.
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: I don't like it.
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: Where the hell is Third Battalion?
- [he abruptly steps into a snow-covered foxhole]
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: Shit!
- [he starts laughing]
- German Soldier: Hinkel?
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: Come on!
- German Soldier: Hinkel, ist du?
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: [Heffron and Spina realize they've accidentally walked through German lines]
- [whispering]
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: Come on! Come on, come on!
- German Soldier: *Hinkel*!
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: [whispering] Gimme a hand!
- [Spina helps Heffron out of the foxhole]
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: Go! Go!
- German Soldier: Schiesse!
- [the German pops out of the foxhole and starts shooting at them]
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: Come on, Spina, move! Move!
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: Come on, come on!
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: You know he told me he was a goddamn virgin?
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: Who?
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: Replacement in my foxhole, Julian.
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: Yeah?
- Pvt. Edward 'Babe' Heffron: Goddamn virgin, just a kid.
- Pvt. Ralph Spina: Only virgin I know is the Virgin Mary.
- [Heffron laughs]