1 review
Beneath my dignity
I have a bone to pick with director John T. Bone. He gives amateurs a bad name by using a pro cast and crew to deliver results worse than most if not all teenage amateurs with a video camera (or now, a cell phone) could achieve in terms of porno spoofing.
The premise is that school cheerleader Tracey Adams has written a sort of school pageant mocking Star Trek & Star Wars, replete with scrawled sketches on paper to represent sets, a toy with firecracker to represent the space ship. Level of humor is way below even the most modest of expectations.
At one point an actress rebels against reciting Tracey's ridiculous dialogue, but the show must go on. Low point of "acting" is likely Randy Spears wearing a gorilla mask, which he removes out of exasperation, to play a Nookie named Chewnocka.
The mission takes them to the Planet Pancreas Four. Robert Bullock (who uses a fake name in the credits, unlike most of the rest of the cast) plays the last man on the planet, but the problem is that he was raised by the Amazonian women there and is a fairy as a result. The planet's queen Eva is facing extinction of their race but after seducing her for some Sapphic sex, Tracey decides an orgy with Bullock will solve his problem.
Another low point is when Eva and Robert are trying to come into the spaceship after Tracey lands it. The hatch won't open, so she gets a scissors and cuts the paper set to admit them. How amusing!
The sex scenes are as slapdash as the rest of this junker, which cost something to produce (some name porn talent and a real crew) but looks cheaper than any porno out there, clearly Bone's goal.
The premise is that school cheerleader Tracey Adams has written a sort of school pageant mocking Star Trek & Star Wars, replete with scrawled sketches on paper to represent sets, a toy with firecracker to represent the space ship. Level of humor is way below even the most modest of expectations.
At one point an actress rebels against reciting Tracey's ridiculous dialogue, but the show must go on. Low point of "acting" is likely Randy Spears wearing a gorilla mask, which he removes out of exasperation, to play a Nookie named Chewnocka.
The mission takes them to the Planet Pancreas Four. Robert Bullock (who uses a fake name in the credits, unlike most of the rest of the cast) plays the last man on the planet, but the problem is that he was raised by the Amazonian women there and is a fairy as a result. The planet's queen Eva is facing extinction of their race but after seducing her for some Sapphic sex, Tracey decides an orgy with Bullock will solve his problem.
Another low point is when Eva and Robert are trying to come into the spaceship after Tracey lands it. The hatch won't open, so she gets a scissors and cuts the paper set to admit them. How amusing!
The sex scenes are as slapdash as the rest of this junker, which cost something to produce (some name porn talent and a real crew) but looks cheaper than any porno out there, clearly Bone's goal.