South Park (1997– )

John 'Nancy' Hansen: Mr. Slave, Anthony Webster, Closing Credits Singer, John Travolta, MLKKK, Trucker

Photos 

Quotes 

• [gay and straight protesters get a hearing from the Governor of South Park on gay marriage] 

  Governor : I believe that I might have come up with a compromise to this whole problem that will make everyone happy! People in the gay community want the same rights as married couples, but dissenters don't want the word "marriage" corrupted. So how about we let gay people get married, but call it something else?

  [everyone listens quietly] 

  Governor : You homosexuals will have all the exact same rights as married couples, but, instead of referring to you as "married", you can be... butt buddies.

  [long silence] 

  Governor : Instead of being "man and wife", you'll be... butt buddies. You won't be "betrothed", you'll be...

  [makes quote with his fingers] 

  Governor : ... butt buddies. Get it? Instead of a "bride and groom", you'd be...

  [makes quote with his fingers again] 

  Governor : ... butt buddies.

  Mr. Slave : We wanna be treated equally!

  Governor : You *are* equal. It's just that, instead of getting engaged, you would be... butt buddies. And everyone is happy!

  Woman : [from the lesbian crowd]  Well, what about lesbians?

  Governor : Well, like anyone cares about fuckin' dykes!

  [the crowd goes into an uproar] 

  Governor : [embarrassed]  Oh, God, I was sure that would work.

• Mr. Slave : Oh. I never should have shoved all those poor animals up my ass.

• Mr. Slave : Oh, Jesus Christ.

• Mr. Slave : Kids, let's keep it down for study group, or else Mr. Garrison is going to punish me.

• Mr. Slave : Oooh, Jesuth Christht.

• Mr. Garrison : Mr. Slave, did you finish taking attendance?

  Mr. Slave : All done-sy wun-sy.