Home Alone 3 (1997)

David Thornton: Earl Unger

Photos 

Quotes 

• Police Officer #1 : Freeze!

  Earl Unger : [in the pool frozen]  You gotta be kidding me.

• Earl Unger : I can't tell you how much I appreciate you hitting me with the minivan.

  Burton Jernigan : Never let your emotions get the best of you. You weren't paying attention. You should have been more vigilant.

  Earl Unger : You should've taken driver's ed. I'm gonna have bad knees when I'm old and I'll have Burton Jernigan to thank.

• Alice : You got hit with a book?

  Earl Unger : Books, plural. A trunk full of books. Then a set of weights. I got hit twice, you dumb broad!

• Burton Jernigan : Unger. What's your position?

  Earl Unger : Heading to Washington Street.

  Burton Jernigan : I didn't copy. Where?

  Earl Unger : I said, I'm heading to Wuh-ah-ah-ah...

  [Jernigan hits Unger while driving] 

  Earl Unger : Stop, you nitwit!

  [the car stops and Unger screams, then collapses into the snow] 

• [Alex is hiding in the closet and Mr. Unger tries to unlock the door] 

  Earl Unger : I'm coming for you, shorty, to pay you back for all the misery you caused me.

  Alice : Mr. Unger, what are you doing?

  Earl Unger : He's in the closet. Scaring him a little, just before I grab him. And behind door number one!

  [Mr. Unger opens the closet door and Alex just disappeared] 

  Earl Unger : Towels.

  Burton Jernigan : Hmph.

  Earl Unger : I saw this door close.

  Alice : Idiot.

  Earl Unger : Would I make it up? Why? What's the point? We working on commission here?

• Alex : [calls out to the crooks]  You're not gonna find me up there, you big, dumb, law-breaking knuckle-heads!

  Earl Unger , Alice , Burton Jernigan : He's outside!

  Alex : [holds the chip]  Recognize this?

• [while Beaupre, Unger, Jernigan and Alice are sitting at the dinner table, they discuss their plans to steal Alex's toy car] 

  Earl Unger : Tomorrow, whack every kid in the neighborhood. Burn them all!

  [the other three "spies" all stare at him] 

  Earl Unger : Then look for that stupid car.

  Peter Beaupre : My thoughts keep turning to number 3026. It's within the operating radius of the toy car. It's in sight of all the houses I've been in.

• Peter Beaupre : We are going to Chicago.

  Earl Unger : In the winter? I packed tropical.

• [Mr. Unger and Mr. Jernigan meet Beaupre, who just found Alex's toy car, at the Alcott's house] 

  Burton Jernigan : It's a video camera. Someone's onto us.

  Earl Unger : Do you think this really matters? Chip's in the car. We're at the airport in 45 minutes.

  Peter Beaupre : Where's Alice?

  Alice : [as she pushes a baby stroller to the Alcott's shed]  What happened?

  Peter Beaupre : There's a woman in the house. I'll go back in and deal with her. Get the chip.

  [Beaupre then hands Alice the car] 

• Alex : Heads up!

  [unleashes booby trap that releases dumbbells on two criminals] 

  Peter Beaupre : How did that happen?

  Earl Unger : I don't know.

  Alex : [donging is heard]  Ouch.

• Peter Beaupre : There are 14 houses. The toy car must be in one of them. We're going have to search them all. We'll come back when it's light.

  Earl Unger : We're gonna work houses in broad daylight?

  Peter Beaupre : It's the suburbs, Mr. Unger. Nobody's home during the day.