She's the One (1996)

Michael McGlone: Francis Fitzpatrick

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Quotes 

• Mr. Fitzpatrick : Let me get this straight. You don't want to cheat on your girlfriend with your wife?

  Francis : Yeah. I guess so.

  Mr. Fitzpatrick : Jesus Christ, Francis! Are you sure I'm your father? You know, I'm gonna have to double check with your mother on this.

• Francis : Well, for one thing, I don't like the fact that you have sex with a geriatric.

  Heather Davis : Well, how do you think I feel about you going home and seeing your wife every night?

  Francis : I haven't had sex with my wife in months.

  Heather Davis : Well, I don't know if that is such a good idea, Francis. Clearly you need the practice.

• Mr. Fitzpatrick : She's gonna be devastated. She's been up at that goddamn church every morning praying for your brother. And then yesterday she tells me I spend too much time on the boat. I don't even want to get into that discussion. And now you're gonna get divorced? Christ. She'll be up with Father John twenty-four hours a day. Thanks a lot, buddy. I'm probably going to have to start making my own breakfast again.

  Francis : I'm sorry if my divorce interferes with your breakfast plans, Dad.

• Francis : Twenty-five fucking years, I've been waiting for the day I'd be bigger, tougher, stronger than you are. When you go down it's gonna hurt, baby. I'm gonna kick your fucking ass! Are you ready? You ready to be humiliated in front of your new wife and your father? You are an ugly bitch, I pity you...

• Heather Davis : He doesn't care about my past.

  Francis Fitzpatrick : Is that because he doesn't know you were a hooker?

  Heather Davis : He was my best customer.

• Francis : Tom, if you were single, would you date your brother's ex-girlfriend?

  Tom : I don't have a brother, Mr. Fitzpatrick.

  Francis : But if you did, is that off-limits?

  Tom : I'd have to say that only the lowest of the low, a real scumbag would date his brother's ex. There's a code between siblings.

  Francis : Thanks Tom!

• Francis Fitzpatrick : Big deal, you're happy. You're never going to make any real money.

• Francis Fitzpatrick : Romance is great, but I just want to remind you, it don't pay the bills.