Flirting with Disaster (1996)

Jonathan Teague Cook: Sheriff

Quotes 

• Sheriff : Bobby, take these forms back to the office, these release forms and get these nice people their car keys. This is all over here. This is a Federal agent here, and he just told me the whole story about the Shlytings.

  Mr. Coplin : Schlitinooks.

  Sheriff : Shitkings.

  Mrs. Coplin : No, Schlichtings

  Sheriff : Well, anyway, it's clear that we have the wrong people here.

  Mel : That's what I've been trying to tell this guy for the last half hour.

  Mrs. Coplin : Thank God for this Federal agent. And by the way, w-w-why are you not wearing pants?

  Agent Paul : I had an experience, that's why.

  Mrs. Coplin : What do you mean?

  Agent Paul : I resisted at first, and then it evolved and it continues to evolve for me.

  Mrs. Coplin : I don't know what the hell he's talking about, but I got some jewelery somewhere, if you please.