The Flintstones (1994)

Kyle MacLachlan: Cliff Vandercave

Photos 

Quotes 

• Mr. Slate : Gentlemen, please, I can't endorse this modernization if it means laying off all those workers. Some of them have been here since the beginning of time.

  Cliff Vandercave : What if I could quadruple your income?

  Mr. Slate : I'll miss them. You were saying?

• Cliff Vandercave : Son of a Brachiosaurus!

• Sharon Stone : I'm worried, Cliff, I think Mr. Flintstone is smarter than we thought.

  Cliff Vandercave : Ha. He'd have to be to get himself dressed in the morning.

• Cliff Vandercave : Do you know what we do up here?

  Fred Flintstone : Well, me and the guys have always wondered.

  Cliff Vandercave : We interface, Flintstone. We conceptualize, tenderize, prioritize.

  Fred Flintstone : When do we eat?

• Cliff Vandercave : [happily]  OK, Fred.

  [clasps his hands together] 

  Cliff Vandercave : Are you ready for your first executive action?

  Fred Flintstone : Ready and willing! Whatever you need, consider it done!

  Cliff Vandercave : Good.

  [seriously] 

  Cliff Vandercave : I want you to fire Bernard Rubble.

  Fred Flintstone : [punches his open palm]  Done!

  [realises] 

  Fred Flintstone : What? Fire Barney? Why?

  Cliff Vandercave : Well, for starters, he scored the lowest on the management aptitude test. He's an imbecile! The company can't afford to have dead weight like him on the payroll!

  Fred Flintstone : But, Mr. Vandercave, he's got a new kid, a mortgage. I'm his best friend. I can't.

  Cliff Vandercave : Fred.

  [puts his arm around Fred] 

  Cliff Vandercave : If you don't fire him, I will. And then I'll fire *you.*

  [Fred looks nervous as Cliff pats him on the shoulder] 

• Fred Flintstone : This is my office? This is my chair?

  Cliff Vandercave : Yeah, not to throw too much at you on your first day, but this big thing here is your desk.

  Fred Flintstone : My desk?

• Cliff Vandercave : Look at those pathetic worms burrowing their lives away. Do you know why I'm up here and they're down there, Miss Stone?

  Sharon Stone : Because you lied on your résumé?

  Cliff Vandercave : No. Because I have vision, and right now I have a vision of you and me dripping with coconut oil on a beach in Rockapulco with Mr. Slate's fortune to keep us company.

  Sharon Stone : I'm glad we see eye to eye.

  Cliff Vandercave : And somewhere down there is the ignorant stooge who will make all my schemes come true.

• Cliff Vandercave : Through the miracle of geothermal power, the raw material is elevated to the second stage where our steam-powered conveyor belts carry...

  Executive in Boardroom : Steam? He's a mad man!

  Cliff Vandercave : *Steam*-powered conveyor belts, carry the product...

• Cliff Vandercave : And in the words of my beloved mother: I'm taking the money and moving to a warmer climate.

• Fred Flintstone : [slams a file down on his desk]  They made a fool out of me.

  Dictabird : Yeah, well, look what they had to work with.

  [laughs, then ducks as Fred throws a piece of the broken file at him; Cliff and Miss Stone burst into Fred's office] 

  Cliff Vandercave : Flintstone! Heard you were down in the file room. Find anything interesting?

  Fred Flintstone : Yeah! I'm on to your little scam! Billing phoney companies and keeping the money for yourself! I'm going to Mr. Slate.

  Cliff Vandercave : Good idea. Turning yourself in might buy you a little leniency.

  Fred Flintstone : *Me*? This entire scheme was *your* idea!

  Cliff Vandercave : True, but I've graciously decided to give you all the credit, since it's *your* name on the requisitions.

  Fred Flintstone : I never touched *any* of that money!

  Cliff Vandercave : Fred, please! Remodeling your house? Furs? Cars? A fully equipped Le Sabertooth?

  [wags his finger] 

  Cliff Vandercave : Tsk, tsk tsk. You should have been more discreet.

  Fred Flintstone : I'm *innocent*!

  Cliff Vandercave : [sarcastically]  Oh, boo-hoo-hoo.

  [seriously] 

  Cliff Vandercave : Miss Stone, call security. Tell them we've uncovered an embezzler.

  [Miss Stone reaches for the phone] 

  Fred Flintstone : [grabs her hand]  Miss Stone, you'll back me up, won't you?

  [glares at Cliff] 

  Sharon Stone : You better run while you still have a chance.

  [Fred looks shockingly at her and heads for the door] 

  Fred Flintstone : [points angrily at Cliff]  You'll never get away with this.

  Cliff Vandercave : I already have.

  [smiles as Fred dashes out of the office]