George Perez credited as playing...
Ricardo Montoya
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: Man, this stuff is great. It's opening up my lungs, it's making me breathe easier.
- Ricardo Montoya: Evidently it's making you fart easier, too.
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: I didn't fart.
- Ricardo Montoya: It's the first rule of prep school etiquette. When you're in a basement with no windows, don't fart.
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: No, the first rule of prep school etiquette is to pretend you're asleep when your roommate's beating off.
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: No, the first rule of prep school etiquette is to wait until your roommate falls asleep before beating off.
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: Was that a personal remark directed at me, roommate?
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: Choke your chicken. It's yours.
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: You slap your monkey all the time! I can't sleep at night!
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: This had better not be mouthwash.
- William "Billy" Tepper: Trust me.
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: [after drinking] Trust me... Asshole, this *is* mouthwash!
- William "Billy" Tepper: No, it's not.
- Ricardo Montoya: It tastes like mouthwash. What the hell is it?
- William "Billy" Tepper: Four parts 100 proof Vodka. Two parts Peppermint Schnapps for that *mouthwash* flavor and one part Crème de Menthe to make it green.
- Luis Cali: Do you speak Spanish?
- Ricardo Montoya: No, not really.
- Luis Cali: [in Spanish] Put a bullet in him.
- Ricardo Montoya: No, wait.
- Luis Cali: Wait? What? You don't speak Spanish.
- Ricardo Montoya: I'm sorry, sir. I do speak a little Spanish.
- [Cali knocks his leg out with his gun]
- Henry "Hank" Giles, III: Well, we managed to stay together anyways.
- Ricardo Montoya: Yeah, that's my ambition in life - to die with you guys.
- Ricardo Montoya: You can't smoke in the dorms.
- Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: What are they going to do? Kick me out?
- William "Billy" Tepper: You're fuckin' morons. You know that don't you? You're fuckin' morons.
- Ricardo Montoya: That's why we hang with you Billy.