Chances Are (1989)

Robert Downey Jr.: Alex Finch

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Miranda sneaks into Alex's bedroom and into his bed wearing only lingerie, crawling under the sheets with him] 

  Alex Finch : [Alex thinking it's Corinne, invitingly responds]  Hi, darling.

  Miranda Jeffries : [Miranda whispers]  Shh! Mom's next door.

  Alex Finch : [Alex sits up turning on the bedroom light]  What are you doing here?

  Miranda Jeffries : What does it look like I'm doing?

  Alex Finch : Miranda!

  [Alex covers his naked chest with the blanket sheet] 

  Miranda Jeffries : What?

  Alex Finch : [Alex sounding like a father says]  It's way past your bedtime. Go to your room!

• [the woman in the bookstore asks Alex who he was before] 

  Woman in the bookstore : Who were you?

  Alex Finch : Oh, me? I was no one special.

  Woman in the bookstore : Oh, we're all special!

  Alex Finch : I mean, I wasn't Cleopatra or Hannibal or someone great or famous.

  Woman in the bookstore : [the woman chuckles]  I know you weren't Cleopatra. I was.

• [Alex and Philip get in a fight on the floor about not believing Alex is Louie] 

  Alex Finch : [Alex defensively yells]  I'm Louie!

  Philip Train : Yeah, and I'm Cleopatra!

  Alex Finch : [Philip wrestles Alex down]  You are not!

  Alex Finch : You fight like her though!

• [Miranda has an argument with the librarian, Mrs. Handy, as Alex Finch comes in and takes over for her] 

  Miranda Jeffries : God, is she always that awful?

  Alex Finch : [Alex makes a disgusted look to her crude remark]  Mom? No.

  Miranda Jeffries : Uh. I'm sorry.

• [Alex Finch gets on the library computer to correct the problem of Miranda's unpaid books] 

  Alex Finch : This is bad.

  Miranda Jeffries : How bad?

  Alex Finch : Worse than I thought.

  Miranda Jeffries : How worse?

  Alex Finch : A lot. According to this, these books weren't legally checked out.

  Miranda Jeffries : [Miranda nervously replies]  Yeah. So?

  Alex Finch : [Alex aggressively replies back]  Yeah! So it means that I can't charge you for them! You beat the system.

  [Miranda realizes Alex corrected the problem of her unpaid books by doing her a kindness, Miranda blushes as Alex smiles] 

• [Alex drives home Philip to Corinne's house] 

  Philip Train : [Philip looks around the mess throughout Alex's front seat]  What are you doing for dinner?

  Alex Finch : Dinner? Uh...

  Philip Train : [Alex opens his glove compartment revealing a couple oranges and a newspaper]  You're coming with me. My friends live just down the street.

• [Alex comes out of the bathroom, remembering that he was Louie in a previous life] 

  Alex Finch : Philip, it's great to see you again.

  Philip Train : [Alex wraps a tight hug around Philip]  It's great to see you.

  Alex Finch : [Alex and Philip turn to see both Miranda and Corinne staring them down, as Alex gets terrified again to have to run back into the bathroom]  Excuse me.

  [Alex runs back into the bathroom slamming the door shut] 

• [Alex and Miranda sit on the guest room bed beside each other] 

  Alex Finch : Have you had a happy life?

  Miranda Jeffries : [Miranda chuckles]  Yeah, I guess so.

  Alex Finch : Is there anything you've wanted that you haven't had?

  Miranda Jeffries : My father.

  Alex Finch : He was a pretty great guy, huh?

  Miranda Jeffries : That's what they tell me.

  Alex Finch : God, you sure have grown up nicely.

  Miranda Jeffries : I'm glad you approve.

  Alex Finch : [Miranda leans forward to kiss Alex on the lips, as Alex holds her off]  Good night.

• [Alex tries to tell Corinne that he's Louie] 

  Alex Finch : I'm not going to beat around the bush. You won't believe me, but there's something you should know.

  Corinne Jeffries : All right.

  Alex Finch : [Alex holds back from telling Corinne the truth, yelling]  Our rain forests are being destroyed at a rate of 50 acres a minute!

• [Alex meets the woman in the bookstore after some books fall] 

  Woman in the bookstore : This your first time as a human?

  Alex Finch : What?

  Woman in the bookstore : [the woman takes a guess as to what Alex was in a previous life]  I'm getting a strong German Shepherd vibration.

  Alex Finch : Uh. I used to be a lawyer.

  Woman in the bookstore : [the woman frowns]  Oh. Close.

• [Alex and Corinne have a pillow fight as she denies to believe he's the real Louie] 

  Alex Finch : I know everything about you, Corinne. I know that you love peanut butter, and rhubarb, and cats with yellow eyes.

  Corinne Jeffries : You're a psychic. You're one of Shirley McClaine's kooks! A spook-bender.

  Alex Finch : You love Johnny Manthis.

  Corinne Jeffries : [Corinne hits Alex with the pillow]  Get out of here!

  Alex Finch : You hate flat feet.

  Corinne Jeffries : [Corinne hits Alex with the pillow again]  Before I scream so loud that everybody in the neighborhood shows up. I'll have you arrested for impersonating a person.

  Alex Finch : And I know you did the Watusi before Lucy Baines, remember? Remember this?

  [Alex kisses Corinne's mouth which gets her mouth to scream while closed, as she moans, the two fall-kissing in her and Louie's bed] 

• [Corinne and Alex talk about Miranda while out on a date] 

  Alex Finch : What was Miranda like at 10?

  Corinne Jeffries : At 10? Precocious. Opinionated. Fiercely independent. She got braces then, which she removed with pliers after wearing them for about an hour.

  Corinne Jeffries : [Alex chuckles]  I remember Philip telling her, 'All great beauties must suffer and sacrifice'

• [Alex asks Corinne to have more babies with him] 

  Alex Finch : [Alex holds Corinne in his hands]  I want to have at least... Two more.

  Corinne Jeffries : Babies?

  Alex Finch : [Alex nods]  It's not too late is it?

  Corinne Jeffries : No.

  Alex Finch : [Alex frowns and smiles]  Can we start tonight?

• [the real Alex compliments Corinne on getting married to Philip] 

  Alex Finch : I just want to say congratulations. You and Philip make a great pair.

  Corinne Jeffries : [Corinne takes Alex by the shoulder]  Thanks Alex. You know. You're the first boyfriend of Miranda's I ever really liked.

• [last lines] 

  Alex Finch : Philip.

  Philip Train : Yeah.

  Alex Finch : There's something I have to tell you.

  Philip Train : Now?

  Alex Finch : I'm in love with Miranda.

  Philip Train : I know.

  [both men smile, as Alex looks to Miranda walking up the aisle in her bridesmaid dress, and Philip looks to Corinne walking up the aisle in her wedding dress] 

  Second Minister : [the wedding Officiant begins to speak]  Dearly beloved, we have come together in the presence of God to witness and bless...

• [Miranda gets Alex to dance with her at the museum party] 

  Alex Finch : [Miranda begins dancing rather close]  Where did you learn to dance like that?

  Miranda Jeffries : I inherited it from my father.

  [Alex nervously grunts continuing to dance]