Little Shop of Horrors (1986)
Rick Moranis: Seymour Krelborn
Photos
Quotes
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Seymour : The Audrey Two is not a healthy girl.
Mr. Mushnik : Strictly between us - neither is the Audrey One.
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Audrey II : Feed me!
Seymour : Does it have to be human?
Audrey II : Feed me!
Seymour : Does it have to be mine?
Audrey II : Feeeed me!
Seymour : Where am I supposed to get it?
Audrey II : [singing] Feed me, Seymour / Feed me all night long - That's right, boy! - You can do it! Feed me, Seymour / Feed me all night long / Ha ha ha ha ha! / Cause if you feed me, Seymour / I can grow up big and strong.
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Seymour : [singing] Poor/All my life I've always been poor/I keep asking God what I'm for/And he tells me, "Gee, I'm not sure"/"Sweep that floor, kid!"/Oh, I started life as an orphan/A child of the street/Here on skid row/He took me in/Gave me shelter, a bed/Crust of bread and a job/Treats me like dirt, calls me a slob/Which I am/So I live...
Company : Downtown!
Seymour : That's your home address/You live...
Company : Downtown!
Seymour : When your life's a mess/You live...
Company : Downtown!
Seymour : Where depression's just status quo.
Company : Down on Skid Row.
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Seymour : It's true! I chopped him up. But I didn't kill him!
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Seymour : Every household in America? Thousands of you eating... that's what you had in mind all along, isn't it?
Audrey II : No shit, Sherlock.
Seymour : We're not talking about one hungry plant here, we're talking about world conquest.
Audrey II : And I want to thank you.
Seymour : You're not gonna get away with this. Your kind never does!
Audrey II : [laughs wildly at Seymour]
Seymour : I don't care what it takes. Only one of us gets out of here alive!
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Seymour : The guy sure looks like plant food to me.
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Orin : [holding a dentist's tool] Let me ask you something! Does this scare you? Would you like if I took this and headed right for your damn incisors?
Seymour : [looks terrified]
Orin : It'd hurt, right?
Seymour : Uh huh.
Orin : You'd scream, right?
Seymour : Uh huh.
Orin : Well get your ass in here!
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Seymour : Wait a minute, Audrey II, that's not a very nice thing to say!
Audrey II : But it's true, isn't it?
Seymour : No! I don't know anybody who deserves to get chopped up and fed to a hungry plant!
Audrey II : Mmmmmm, sure you do!
[Turns Seymour around to look out the window. They see Orin and Audrey. Orin yells at Audrey and at last hits her]
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Patrick Martin : Me and the guys at the home office have been following this plant of yours. We've come up with one incredible idea. We're very proud of it. Picture this: we take leaf cuttings, develop little Audrey IIs and sell them to florist shops across the nation. Pretty soon every household in America could have one.
Seymour : [concerned] Every household in America!
Patrick Martin : For starters, kid. Why, this thing could go... worldwide!
Seymour , Audrey : [to each other, panicked:] *Worldwide*?
Patrick Martin : With the right advertising, this thing could be bigger than Hula-Hoops.
Audrey : [to Seymour, intrigued:] Bigger than Hula-Hoops?
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Seymour : Wait for me, Audrey. This is between me and the vegetable!
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Orin : Look Seymour, this could happen to you. Unless I take immediate action.
Seymour : [helpless in dentist chair] What's that?
Orin : [enthusiastically] A drill.
Seymour : It's rusty!
Orin : It's an antique. They don't make 'em like this any more. Sturdy. Heavy. Dull!
Orin : I'm gonna want some gas fer this.
Seymour : Oh, thank God. I thought you weren't gonna use any.
Orin : Oh, the gas isn't for you Seymour, it's for me. You see, I wanna really enjoy this.
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[Seymour points a gun at him]
Orin : [while wearing a gas mask, sees it] Huh? What the hell's that? A gun?
[laughs out of control]
Orin : [sarcastically while laughing still] Kid's got a goddamn revolver Oh, Jesus! I'm in trouble now, huh?
[Orin laughs still as Seymour goes nervous still pointing the gun at him]
Orin : Oh, wait till I turn this gas off.
[takes the cap off by accident]
Orin : Uh-oh! Oh, give me a hand, would you? No, I guess you wouldn't, would you?
[laughs again but coughs as he tries to take the mask off]
Orin : You see, Seymour, I could asphyx...
[coughs out of control]
Orin : I could asphyx...
[continues laughing and coughing until he collapses on the floor]
Orin : [stops laughing] What'd I ever do to you?
Seymour : [lowers the gun] Nothing. It's what you did to her.
Orin : Her who?
[Seymour does not answer]
Orin : [finally gets it] Oh... her...
[Orin then dies from too much nitrous oxide as Seymour goes puzzled]
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[Seymour recounts how he found Audrey II]
Seymour : You remember that total eclipse of the sun about a week ago?
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : [singing] Da-doo!
Seymour : I was walkin' in the wholesale flower district that day...
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : Shoop da-doo.
Seymour : And I passed by this place, where this old Chinese man...
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : Chang, da-doo.
Seymour : He sometimes sells me weird and exotic cuttings...
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : Snip, da-doo.
Seymour : 'Cause he knows, you see, that strange plants are my hobby.
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : Da da da da da da-doo.
Seymour : He didn't have anything unusual there that day.
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : Nope, da-doo.
Seymour : So, I was just about to, you know, walk on by...
Doo-Wop Street Singer : Good for you.
Doo-Wop Street Singer , Doo-Wop Street Singer , Doo-Wop Street Singer , Doo-Wop Street Singer : [scatting]
Seymour : When suddenly, and without warning, there was this...
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : ...total eclipse of the sun!
Seymour : It got very dark, and there was this strange humming sound, like something from another world.
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : Da-doo!
Seymour : And when the light came back, this weird plant was just sitting there...
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : Whoop, see-doo.
Seymour : Just, you know, stuck in, among the zinnias.
Crystal , Ronette , Chiffon : Audrey II!
Seymour : I coulda sworn it hadn't been there before, but the old Chinese man sold it to me anyways, for a dollar ninety-five.
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Audrey II : [Seymour quietly tries to sneak out of the shop with suitcases while the plant is asleep. As he slowly opens the door...] Feed me.
Seymour : Under NO circumstances.
Audrey II : FEED me.
Seymour : [annoyed] I will not, so stop asking.
Audrey II : Feed me!
Seymour : [puts down suitcase] No! No more! I can't keep living with the guilt
Audrey II : [coldly] Tough titty.
Seymour : You watch your language.
Audrey II : [stands up to full height] Ooooh, cut the crap! Bring on the meat!
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[Seymour is attempting to put a plant on a high shelf. The shelving unit falls and the plants crash to the floor]
Mr. Mushnik : Seymour, what's going on?
Seymour : Very little, Mr. Mushnik.
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Seymour : [singing] Suddenly Seymour / Is standing beside you
Audrey : [singing] Suddenly Seymour / Showed me I can...
Seymour : [singing over sustain] Yes you can...
Patrick Martin : Excuse me! Pardon me, beg your pardon, if you two kids would stop singing for just a moment I've got something I want to discuss with you.
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Mr. Mushnik : [after Seymour asks why Mushnik is angry at him] Little red dots all over the linoleum, little red spots on the concrete outside - I'm talking blood, Krelborn! I'm talking under my own roof!
[grabs an axe]
Mr. Mushnik : An axe murderer!
[Seymour goes alarmed]
Audrey II : [sings off-screen] He's got your number now.
Mr. Mushnik : I saw everything!
Audrey II : He knows just what you've done.
Mr. Mushnik : Everything you did to her boyfriend!
Audrey II : You've got no place to hide.
Mr. Mushnik : [swings the axe] I saw you chopping him!
Audrey II : You've got nowhere to run.
Seymour : [innocently] It's true! I chopped him up, but I didn't kill him!
Audrey II : He knows your life of crime.
Mr. Mushnik : [points a gun at him] Tell it to the police!
Audrey II : I think it's suppertime!
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[theatrical cut]
Seymour : [after saving Audrey from Audrey II] Are you okay?
Audrey : Yes... No...
[Audrey collapses]
Seymour : Audrey! Audrey!
Audrey : [gets back up] No, I'm okay.
Seymour : I'm sorry, Audrey, I'm just so sorry. I never meant to hurt you, I never meant to hurt anyone. It's just that somehow it makes things happen - terrible things. Well, I guess I should've stopped when I found out what it lived on, but it was cute and harmless, and we started doing business and making money and you like me...
Audrey : Seymour! Do you really think I liked you because of that?
[Seymour goes silent]
Audrey : I liked you from the day I came to work here.
Seymour : You mean you still like me, even if I wasn't famous?
Audrey : [smiles] I'd still love you Seymour.
Seymour : Really?
Audrey : All I ever wanted was you... and that sweet little house.
Seymour : [happily] Oh, Audrey, you're the most wonderful person that ever lived! We're gonna get that little house and everything will be okay somehow, you'll see!
[sings]
Seymour : Suddenly Seymour is standing beside you.
Audrey : [sings] Suddenly Seymour showed me I can!
Seymour : Yes, you can!
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Patrick Martin : Whaddya say, Seymour? Do we have a deal?
Seymour : No! Keep your contract. Nobody's touchin' that plant, you hear?
Patrick Martin : Hey, we're offerin' a lotta money here!
Seymour : Forget the money. Take the money and leave!
Patrick Martin : Whaddya, nuts?
Seymour : Yeah, I'm nuts! Get outta here!
Patrick Martin : Hey, now, come on!
Seymour : Go on! Get outta here!
Patrick Martin : You're a loon!
Seymour : Go on and get out!
Patrick Martin : Look, I'll come back when you're in a better mood!
Seymour : Go on, get outta here now!
Patrick Martin : Alright!
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Seymour , Audrey : [singing] Gee, it sure would be swell to get outta here/Bid the gutter farewell and get outta here/I'd move Heaven and Hell to get outta Skid/I'd do I don't know what to get outta Skid...
Company : Downtown!
Seymour , Audrey : But a hell of a lot to get outta Skid...
Company : Downtown!
Seymour , Audrey : People tell me there's not a way outta Skid...
Company : Downtown!
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[director's cut]
Seymour : 'Every household in America'! That's what you had in mind, isn't it?
Audrey II : No shit, Sherlock!
Seymour : We're not talking about one hungry plant here; we're talking about world conquest!
Audrey II : And I wanna thank you!
Seymour : [distraught] You ate the only thing I ever loved!
[Audrey II laughs at him]
Seymour : You're a monster, and so am I! It's gotta end! It's gotta stop right here!
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Seymour : Audrey, that's all behind you now. You got nothing to be ashamed of. You're a very nice person. l always knew you were. Underneath the bruises and the handcuffs, you know what l saw? A girl l respected. I still do.
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Seymour : You okay?
Audrey : Yes... no...
[Audrey falls to the ground. Seymour helps her up and holds her in his arms]
Seymour : Don't die, Audrey! Please don't die!
Audrey : You know, the plant just said the strangest thing just now. It said Orin and Mr. Mushnik are already inside!
Seymour : It's true. I did it. I fed them to it.
Audrey : And that's what made it so big and strong, and you so famous?
Seymour : I've done terrible things, Audrey, but not to you. Never to you.
Audrey : But... I want you to, Seymour.
Seymour : What?
Audrey : When I die, which should be very shortly, give me to the plant, so that it will live and bring you all the wonderful things you deserve.
Seymour : You don't know what you're saying.
Audrey : But I do! It's the one gift I can give you. And if I'm in the plant, then I am part of the plant, so in a way... we'll always be together.
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Seymour : [singing] Gee, l'd like a Harley machine, Tooling around like l was James Dean, Making all the guys on the corner turn green...
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Audrey II : Feed me!
Seymour : I beg your pardon?
Audrey II : Feed me!
Seymour : Twoey, you talked! You opened your... .trap, your thing, and you said... .
Audrey II : Feed me, Krelborn! Feed me now!
Seymour : I can't
Audrey II : I'm starving!
Seymour : [Trying to drip blood from his finger] Oh boy, look, maybe I can squeeze a little out of this one, but... .
Audrey II : I need some food!
Seymour : I know, but you can't get food from a... .
Audrey II : More! More!
Seymour : I haven't got any more! What do you want me to do, slit my wrists?
[Audrey turns towards Seymour and does a big, expectant, open-mouthed take]
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Seymour : You're a plant, Audrey II! An inanimate object!
Audrey II : [Violently writhing its tentacles, using them to rake a chair across the floor, forcing Seymour into it] Does this look inanimate to you, punk? If I can move, and I can talk, who's to say I can't do anything I want?
Seymour : Like what?
Audrey II : Like deliver, pal! Like see your secret, greasy heart get everything it desires!
[singing]
Audrey II : Would you like a Cadillac Car/ Or a guest spot on Jack Parr/ How about a date with Hedy Lamarr?
