John Kapelos credited as playing...
Carl
- John Bender: How does one become a janitor?
- Carl: You wanna be a janitor?
- John Bender: No, I just want to know how one becomes a janitor. Because Andrew here is very interested in pursuing a career in the custodial arts.
- Carl: Oh really? You guys think I'm just some untouchable peasant? Serf? Peon? Well, maybe so. But following a broom around after shitheads like you for the last 8 years, I've learned a couple of things. I look through your letters. I look through your lockers. I listen to your conversations, you don't know that but I do. I am the eyes and ears of this institution, my friends.
- [Carl looks up at the clock and looks at his watch]
- Carl: By the way, that clock's 20 minutes fast.
- Richard Vernon: You think about this: when you get old, these kids - when *I* get old - they're going to be running the country.
- Carl: Yeah.
- Richard Vernon: Now this is the thought that wakes me up in the middle of the night. That when I get older, these kids are going to take care of me.
- Carl: I wouldn't count on it.
- Richard Vernon: What did you wanna be when you were young?
- Carl: When I was a kid, I wanted to be John Lennon.
- Richard Vernon: Carl, don't be a goof. I'm making a serious point here.
- Richard Vernon: Carl, I've been teaching for 22 years. And each year, these kids get more and more arrogant.
- Carl: Aw, bullshit, man. Come on, Vern. The kids haven't changed. You have. You took a teaching position because you thought it'd be fun, right? Thought you could have summer vacations off. And then you found out it was actually work. That really bummed you out.
- Richard Vernon: These kids turned on me. They think I'm a big fucking joke.