Strange Brew (1983)
Rick Moranis: Bob McKenzie
Photos
Quotes
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Bob MacKenzie : [to Pam in a beer tank that's being flooded with beer] My brother and I used to say that drownin' in beer was like heaven, eh? Now he's not here, and I've got two soakers... this isn't heaven. This sucks!
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Doug McKenzie : I am your father, Luke. Give in to the dark side of the force, you knob.
Bob McKenzie : He saw Jedi 17 times, eh.
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Bob McKenzie : This movie was shot in 3B - three beers - and it looks good, eh?
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[realizing that the brakes don't work on their speeding van]
Doug McKenzie : [folding his arms] No point in steering now.
Bob McKenzie : You steer this thing!
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Bob McKenzie : [holding up a piece of cardboard with "2051 A.D. Ten years after World War 4"] Give enough time to see- okay.
Doug McKenzie : Okay, then. "Ten years after World War 4", eh.
Bob McKenzie : 2051- No, more! 2051, the future!
Doug McKenzie : [fighting with Bob over the cardboard] What, no! They saw it already! Take off!
Bob McKenzie : [Camera suddenly cuts to a shot of Bob standing on some rocks]
[voice-over]
Bob McKenzie : I was the only one left on the planet after the holocaust, eh.
Doug McKenzie : [behind the camera] Hey, hoser! Go!
[Bob starts moving]
Bob McKenzie : [voice-over] The Earth had been like desur-stated by nucular war. Like Russia blew up the US and the US blew up Russia, eh.
Bob McKenzie : [picks up a broken Statue of Liberty figurine; looking directly at the camera] Statue of Liberty.
Doug McKenzie : [directing Bob] Psst, act! Act!
Bob McKenzie : [voice-over] Lucky for me, I'd been off planet - on vacation at the time of the war, eh. There wasn't much to do. All the bowling alleys had been wrecked. So's I spent most of my time looking for beer.
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Bob McKenzie : [to their dog] Eh... Hosehead, once you get there you can have all the free beer and sausages you want.
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Bob McKenzie : [to Pam] If I didn't have puke breath, I'd kiss you.
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Bob McKenzie : I gotta take a leak so bad I can taste it!
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Bob McKenzie : One day, I was out looking for a nice place to build a city for my children, when I spotted a mutant in the Forbidden Zone.
[Camera cuts between Bob pretending to fly while glancing at the camera and a model of the van "flying" across the field]
Bob McKenzie : I landed my vehicle to pursue and destroy this genetic freak before he could warn other mutants in the underground caves. I was kinda like a one-man force, eh, like Charlton Heston in "Omega Man." Did you see it? It's beauty.
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Bob McKenzie : He once got our dead battery goin' by mixin' bird feces and spit, cause there's like acids in it, eh?
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[Bob and Doug are on the witness stand in the courtroom after being sworn on the Bible to tell the truth prior to testimony]
Bob McKenzie : I do.
Doug McKenzie : I do.
Bob McKenzie : I guess we're married, clerk.
Doug McKenzie : Oh.
Bob McKenzie : Where's the honeymoon?
The Judge : Order, Order!
Bob McKenzie : Gimmie a toasted back bacon, hold the toast.
Doug McKenzie : Don't make me laugh, eh.
The Judge : I remind you not to speak, until you are spoken to!
Bob McKenzie : He's startin' to sound like the old man. Soon he'll be sending me out for beers.
[Doug sneezes out the two bullets in his nose... which ricochet around the courtroom!]
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Bob McKenzie : Jeez, two minutes for elbowing!
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Doug McKenzie : [after pouring a beer for their dad into a glass from a dog dish] You take it to him.
Bob McKenzie : No way, you take it to him.
Doug McKenzie : No, you.
Bob McKenzie : [both holding the glass] No! I'm gonna let go. I'm lettin' go and you're takin it.
Doug McKenzie : No! I'm lettin' go.
Bob McKenzie : Let go then.
Doug McKenzie : [both let go and the glass smashes] Dad! Bob broke your beer!
Bob McKenzie : No I didn't! Doug broke it!
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Bob McKenzie : Ok, all cops, get out of your cars.
[the cops get out of their cars]
Bob McKenzie : Ok, I want to take a head count. Like maybe we'll have some breakfast. Some back bacon sandwiches while we was waiting. Ok, another thing, you all went through the stop sign back there, and that's a moving violation, and my brother and I... we have a lot of parking tickets...
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[Doug and Bob are hooked up to a polygraph lie detector]
Ted : What have you done with the disk?
Doug McKenzie : What are you looking at me for? I don't got it.
[Ted looks at the polygraph which doesn't show anything off]
Bob McKenzie : Maybe it's out of gas, eh?
[Doug then passes gas in a loud flatulence noise]
Bob McKenzie : Uh, man! You farted!
Doug McKenzie : It wasn't me, it was the chair!
Bob McKenzie : He's lying!
[now the polograph begins showing activity]
Ted : He's definitely lying all right.
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Doug McKenzie : Figures you wouldn't know how to work it if it's got a computer.
Bob McKenzie : Oh yeah, Mister Wizard, you know, eh...
Doug McKenzie : Let me try, I'm a genius.
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Bob McKenzie : Fleshy-headed mutant. Are you friendly?
Doug McKenzie : No way, eh? Ra-... radiation has made... me an enemy of civilization.
Bob McKenzie : [into a comm unit] Alpha Base. This is Bob McKenzie. I've spotted a fleshy-headed mutant in sector 16B.
[Doug walks off camera behind the van; camera cuts to Bob shooting Doug with a toy foam launcher]
Doug McKenzie : Ahhh! Take off, you hoser.
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Bob McKenzie : Remind me to pay his bill on time, eh?
Doug McKenzie : Yeah, Chuck Norris for the defense, eh?
Bob McKenzie : Beauties.
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Bob McKenzie : He's guarding the beer, what're we going to do?
Doug McKenzie : Bribe him.
Bob McKenzie : Well, give him a donut. A jelly, he likes jelly. Jelly donut comin'! Ok, Hosehead?
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Pam Elsinore : You know how to handle one of those big rigs?
Bob McKenzie : Jeez, it's a ten-speed.
Doug McKenzie : Yeah, sure, o' corse, like, uh, we drive 'em, all the time, eh.
Pam Elsinore : Well take off, eh.