The Bill (1984–2010)
Mark Wingett: D.C. Carver, PC Jim Carver, D.C. Jim Carver, P.C. Carver, DC Jim Carver, P.C. Jim Carver, DS Jim Carver
Photos
Quotes
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PC Jim Carver : Bradford? She's got about as much community spirit as Adolf Hitler.
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[about Inspector Gina Gold]
PC Jim Carver : How's the dragon this morning? Is she breathing fire or smoking it?
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DC Jim Carver : Here you go: one fresh tortoise.
PC Reg Hollis : Oh, dear.
PC Honey Harman : What?
PC Reg Hollis : Well, it's just as I thought... It's Greek.
PC Honey Harman : How can you tell that?
DC Jim Carver : The accent?
PC Reg Hollis : It's where they come from when they're imported from the wild. Has he got any others?
DC Jim Carver : No, that was the last one. But he said he was expecting another delivery this evening.
PC Gary Best : Is this serious? We're doing a stakeout on some tortoises?
PC Reg Hollis : Yeah, all right, Gary, no jesting. Look, Jim's got some very good information that the man in the shop round the corner is expecting a delivery tonight of illegally-imported wild tortoises. Get yourself outside the shop where you can have a good look at the front of it.
PC Gary Best : Is there a back entrance?
DC Jim Carver : No.
PC Reg Hollis : And listen, if it all goes off, we're just here, give us a shout.
PC Gary Best : All goes off? These tortoises on crack or what? I've always wanted to be in the flying squad, and this is obviously what it's like!
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PC Jim Carver : Say you got a credit card, right?
DC Alfred 'Tosh' Lines : Yep.
PC Jim Carver : And some slag's got your details...
DC Alfred 'Tosh' Lines : Yep, yep.
PC Jim Carver : And they're usin' it, buying stuff.
DC Alfred 'Tosh' Lines : Yep, yep, what's your point?
PC Jim Carver : Well, you are still entitled to the points aren't you?
DC Alfred 'Tosh' Lines : Penetrating intelligence like yours, Jim, I don't know why you've not been promoted.
PC Jim Carver : You takin' the mickey?
