The Mary Tyler Moore Show (1970–1977)
Edward Asner: Lou Grant
Photos
Quotes
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Lou Grant : You know, Mary, you've got spunk.
Mary Richards : Why, thank you, Mr. Grant.
Lou Grant : I hate spunk.
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Mary Richards : Well, what's the cut-off point Mr. Grant? I mean, is... is there some number? You know, I'd really like to know. How many men is a woman allowed to have before she becomes *that* sort of woman?
Lou Grant : Six.
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Lou Grant : You want a raise, is that it?
Ted Baxter : Lou, I've written a figure on this pad.
Lou Grant : Ted, I've written two words on this pad.
Ted Baxter : Lou, I thing there's some room for negotiation between that figure and those words.
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Lou Grant : Put it on an idiot card for Ted.
Ted Baxter : Cue cards, Lou. I don't know why everyone insists on calling cue cards idiot cards.
Murray Slaughter : We just have trouble thinking of you as a cue.
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[explaining a dream to Lou and Murray]
Ted Baxter : I dreamt I was an old man, all wrinkled and shriveled, sitting alone on this park bench, and then this-this guy walked up to me, and he looked kind of familiar, and he just stood there, looking at me. And I said, "Who are you?" And he said, "I'm the son you never had." And then-then this woman appeared, and I said, "Who are you?", and she said, "I'm the daughter you never had." And then-then about twenty kids appeared, and I said, "Who are you?" And they said, "we're the children of the children you never had." Then a bunch of dogs and cats appeared, and I said, "Who are you?" And they said, "We're the pets of the children of the children you never had." And then a bunch of guys in white coats came up, and I said, "Who are you?" And they said, "We're the Veterinarians of the pets of the children of the children you never had." And then, and then...
Lou Grant : Ted, just-just skip to the finish of the dream. Tell us how it ended.
Ted Baxter : Oh like all my dreams end, with Marlo Thomas and Winston Churchill applauding me.
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Mary Richards : Mr. Grant? Could I say what I wanted to say now? Please?
Lou Grant : Okay, Mary.
Mary Richards : Well I just wanted to let you know that sometimes I get concerned about being a career woman. I get to thinking that my job is too important to me. And I tell myself that the people I work with are just the people I work with. But last night I thought what is family anyway? It's the people who make you feel less alone and really loved.
[she sobs]
Mary Richards : And that's what you've done for me. Thank you for beginning MY family.
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[there is a party at Mary's. Mary has suggested playing a game where one person says a word and the next person thinks of a word that begins with the last letter of the word they heard]
Lou Grant : Does this game go on forever or does it have an end?
Mary Richards : It ends when a person can't think of a word.
Lou Grant : Oh, I'll start. (Lou turns to Ted Baxter.) Box! (Ted cannot think of a word and says nothing.) Game's over.
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Lou Grant : Rule number one: never hire friends. I hired a friend once and you know what happened? Worked out great. But that's me. You couldn't handle it.
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Lou Grant : Mary, I don't want you to take this wrong, but you're a jerk.
Mary Richards : How could I possibly take that wrong?
