- [criticizing England's youth culture]
- Old Man: Mods and Rockers!
- Dress Shop Owner: I thought I would never see such purity of passion. Absolute ripeness. I must please you and I think I can. Don't fear me. Cause, I shall never be able to trust myself with a woman again, ever Try it on! I'm sure. I know I can please you. Show me. Wait for me.
- Tom: What's the most frightening building in London?
- Colin: Great Ormond Street Hospital for Children.
- Tom: I believe you're right.
- Nancy Jones: What's that?
- Colin: Great Ormond Street Hospital for Children.
- Nancy Jones: That's nice. That's true. That's a nice thing to say.
- Colin: At 13, were you promiscuous?
- Tom: We're all of us, more or less, sexual failures.
- Colin: Well, Tolen isn't a sexual failure.
- Tom: Well, he needed 5 hours a day, he says.
- Colin: Well then he can't be a sexual failure, can he? He can't be a sexual failure? Well, he can't be a sexual failure having it 5 hours a day, can he?
- [first lines: Colin imagines that Tolen has a long queue of identically-clad young women all the way up the stairs to his bedroom]
- Colin: It's not like that; it's an exaggeration! He has just got a certain success with the ladies - that's all.
- Tolen: Women, not indivduals, just types. Types. Women surrendering, free from responsibility, if pushed. Man must dominate. Dominate. Dominate. Dominate.
- Tolen: Food is of the utmost importance. Food is of the essence. One's body needs protein and energy-giving substance. I find that with my, perhaps, unusual sexual demands, my body requires at least twice the normal daily intake of protein.
- Tolen: How do I acquire the knack, Tolen?
- Colin: Yes! How, Tolen. How? The knack?
- Tolen: Well, now, first you must establish contact.
- Colin: Yes! Contact, Tolen!
- Tolen: I'm busy, Colin.
- Colin: Come on, Tolen. You were telling me to establish contact.
- Tolen: Yes and I'm not referring to touch.
- Colin: Not to touch.
- Tolen: Tactile communication. But, of course, touch comes later.
- Colin: Touch comes later!
- Tolen: Excuse me. I mean, there's a feeling - between you.
- Colin: A feeling!
- Tolen: You're aware of the girl.
- Colin: You're aware!
- Tolen: The girl is aware of of you.
- Colin: She's aware!
- Tolen: The vibrations between you.
- Colin: Vibrations!
- Tolen: Rory is well aware that he will profit by the arrangement. He will learn much, Colin, from the women who have been with me.
- Colin: Couldn't I just share your women, Tolen? I mean, you don't want Rory rampaging through the house, all over the place, with women and things. I mean, a house full of women - sharing - and doing things that none of us ever dreamt of doing before!
- Tolen: A clever man. A gifted man. A man I can respect. He knows a great many things. Rory McBryde was doing things at 13, Colin, that you haven't ever done. Things you don't even know about.
- Home Improvement Voiceover #1 - Woman: I adore a piece of wood. It's feel. I hope I always get a kick from the feel of a length of wood.
- Home Improvement Voiceover #5 - Man: Shame to hide a good screw.
- Home Improvement Voiceover #3 - Man: There's mastery in a job well done if you have a way with tools.
- Home Improvement Voiceover #4 - Man: I like the twist of a good screw.
- Man on the Street: I come from Hampton Wick myself; so, I'm used to innuendo.
- Colin: [to Tolen] Satisfy her.
- Nancy Jones: Rape.
- Colin: She wants raping; so, go in there and rape her!
- Nancy Jones: I'm not being done twice.
- Colin: Now, let's look at this objectively. Some tea. You'll feel better after a nice cup of tea. I'm sure.
- Colin: I couldn't stand it. It would drive me mad. Two of them? The stairs would be on the continual go. All those women. Oh, my blood's not up to it. And the bathroom, what about the bathroom? You'd never get near to the bathroom.
- [he enters the bathroom and sees it filled with women]
- Colin: That's not a gross exaggeration.
- [of Tolen's "rough play" with women]
- Tom: Just think of what you could do with a real whip, Tolen. A real whip.
- Colin: That's what we need in this house - a real steadying influence... A monk! There must be monks, or older men who are accountants. Poor old men, in sexless professions.
- Older Woman on Bus #1: [watching Nancy leave the bus] Open. That's what she's doing. Open to being debauched.
- Older Man on Bus: It's bound to end in tears.
- Older Woman on Bus #2: Innocent eyes of blue. What her legs are walking her into.
- Colin: Her class was doing the behaving! My lads are made of flesh. All that leapin' up-and-down in those... That's what I behavior - that's provocative behavior. We've all got to make allowances. Find our equilibrium at every turn. How?
- Home Improvement Voiceover #2 - Woman: Jerry-built. Pardon my French.
- Tom: In Walt Disney's early films, there were cows and the censors cut the udders out. Yeah. So, he - so, he put brassieres on 'em. Imagine. Well, Jersey cows wear brassieres, it's true. Jersey cows wear brassieres - there's something wrong there, you know. Cows shouldn't need brassieres. Human beings need 'em; because, they stand upright. They used to go on all fours and they hung downwards - vertically. But, now they stand upright and it puts on a terrible strain.
- [Nancy giggles]
- Tom: Alright. Alright, but, it's true.
- Woman on the Street: I was never given the opportunity to so much as breaststroke before I was sent to sea - and I'm much better for it.
- Tolen: What's the matter? Is anything wrong? Is there anything the matter with you?
- Nancy Jones: No, no.
- Tolen: Why are you so nervous?
- Nancy Jones: I'm not.
- Tolen: You look nervous.
- Nancy Jones: Me? Nervous? Do I?
- Tolen: Yes.
- Nancy Jones: Oh.
- Tolen: Yes.
- Nancy Jones: Nothing.
- Tolen: What's the matter?
- Nancy Jones: It - it's...
- Tolen: What?
- Nancy Jones: It's...
- Tolen: You are nervous, aren't you. Very nervous. Why don't you take your clothes off.
- Nancy Jones: I don't want to.
- Tolen: Oh, my dear. No. You - you take it off.
- Nancy Jones: I don't want to.
- Tolen: Why don't you want to?
- Tom: As you know, any organ not in constant use atrophies. So, the jaw began to shrivel and shrivel and - and so, drop off. Not that you need worry about anything like that.
- Tolen: No ones going to rape you.
- Nancy Jones: Oh?
- Tolen: No. Girls don't get raped unless they want it.
- Nancy Jones: Want it?
- Tolen: You've got Chinese eyebrows.
- Nancy Jones: Eh?
- Tolen: Chinese eyebrows. Very clear arch. Very delicate.
- Nancy Jones: Have I?
- Tolen: If you've got a mirror, I'll show you.
- Tolen: All right, Colin, she's all yours.
- Colin: What?
- Tolen: You have a try.
- Colin: Me?
- Tolen: Yes.
- Colin: Has Cardiff got big docks?
- Nancy Jones: What?
- Tolen: Has Cardiff got big docks?
- Nancy Jones: What?
- Colin: Welsh.
- Nancy Jones: Welsh?
- Colin: Aren't you?
- Nancy Jones: Where did you say the YWCA was?
- Nancy Jones: Keep off. Keep off! You hear? Don't touch me. All right? All right? Now, now then, now - what is it? What you want with me? What you tryin' on, eh? What you tryin' to do? Smarty. Smarty, you. Mr., you, smart. Mr., you smarty. You think - you think you're all right. You think you're pretty clever. You do, don't you, Mr. Smarty Tight - Tight Trousers. Mr. Tight Trousers. Mr. Narrow Slacks. You think you're the kit - the cat's. I'll show you Mr. Tight Trousers. Just you don't better come near me. Did you hear? Just you don't - better come near me. Well, just you, well. Come near me. Well, Mr. Tight Slacks. Mr. - come near me. Come near me! Come near me! Come near me! Come! Come.
- Tolen: How sweet you are. Such a sweet face. Such sweetness. Come upstairs. Come. Come up. Come upstairs.
- Nancy Jones: Oh?