- John: Are you the new soldier fella?
- Major Bernard R. 'Barney' Benson: Yeah.
- John: You got a lot of ribbons, what do they stand for?
- Major Bernard R. 'Barney' Benson: Good conduct.
- Major Bernard R. 'Barney' Benson: Pull yourself together, Flaherty.
- Cadet Thomas 'Tiger' Flaherty: I can't help it, I'm gonna throw up!
- Major Bernard R. 'Barney' Benson: We've gotta turn these milkshake drinking school boys into whiskey drinking soldiers.
- Cadet Thomas 'Tiger' Flaherty: [saying evening prayers] ... lead us not into temptation but deliver is from eagles. Amen.
- Mother Redempta: No, Thomas. Deliver us from evil, not eagles.
- Mother Redempta: [showing Benson a portrait of a priest] This is our school's founder. He was canonized in 1857.
- Major Bernard R. 'Barney' Benson: Aw, gee... That's too bad.
- [first lines]
- Young Lieutenant: Major, you're exposed!
- Major Bernard R. 'Barney' Benson: Get the men back to their original positions. We'll try it again.
- Young Lieutenant: Major, we've executed the maneuver twenty-seven times since noon. The men are tired.
- Major Bernard R. 'Barney' Benson: They missed their objective by seventeen seconds. Now do it till they do it right.
- Young Lieutenant: Yes, sir.