The Gay Deception (1935)
Francis Lederer: Sandro
Quotes
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Consul-General : Your highness is a bellboy?
Sandro : I was a bellboy. That's why I came to see you. I got fired.
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Mr. Squires : Young man, I'll tell you a secret - just among men, okay?
Sandro : Yeah.
Mr. Squires : All Women's hats are monstrosities.
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Consul-General : Perhaps your highness would prefer to be the janitor?
Sandro : Oh, janitor, or general manager, house detective, anything. I don't care.
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Sandro : Such a pretty little guest and a monstrosity of the hat.
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Sandro : Does madam wish to order?
Mirabel : I'll have fried chicken.
Sandro : Well, if I may suggest..
Mirabel : What?
Sandro : The pigeonette du clos, I assure madam, is superb.
Mirabel : I'll have the chicken, please.
Sandro : But, the pigeonette eh...
Mirabel : Fried chicken!
Sandro : The pigeonette du clos with a............
Mirabel : [Slamming her hand on the table] Fried chicken!
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Mr. Squires : I'll tell you another secret.
Sandro : Yes, please.
Mr. Squires : You won't tell anybody?
Sandro : Oh, no. What is it?
Mr. Squires : You're fired.
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Mr. Squires : Young man, you are fired.
Sandro : I know.
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Sandro : Say, what's the matter? You don't seem very glad to see me.
Consul-General : But I don't see. Your highness can't possibly be here.
Sandro : Can't I?
Consul-General : Your highness mustn't be here. Your highness isn't here.
Sandro : Well, where am I then?
Consul-General : Your highness, your highness is on the Colonia, in the middle of the ocean.
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Consul-General : Your highness is a bellboy?
Sandro : I was a bellboy. That's why I came to see you. I got fired.
Consul-General : Huh?
Sandro : Yes, I got fired.
Consul-General : What? They cannot fire Prince Alesandro d'Alesandria
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Sandro : You've got to call the Walsdorf-Plaza. Ask for Mr. Spitzer, and tell him that if he wants the contracts, it, uh, might be wise to reinstate one of your countrymen - a bellboy, Number 14, huh.
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Mirabel : Do you want me to call the head waiter?
Sandro : I don't care if you call the police, madam, I am only trying to tell you that you are right and I am wrong. You are the guest and I am the waiter. I forgot myself. I beg you to forgive me. Please, don't you understand? I apologize.
Head Waiter : [Arriving at her table] What is wrong, madam?
[to Sandro]
Head Waiter : What's going on here?
Sandro : Please go away. Don't disturb us.
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Mr. Squires : Young man, I'll tell you a secret - just among men, okay?
Sandro : Yeah.
Mr. Squires : All Women's hats are monstrosities.
Sandro : No kid... Oh, that's so true, Mr. Squires.
Mr. Squires : That's a secret we men must carry to our graves.
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Mirabel : Or maybe you think I like everything about you.
Sandro : All right, let's start with what you don't like about me.
Mirabel : Well, your nose is crooked.
Sandro : My nose is crooked? I never knew that. Well, I can have that fixed. Is that all?
Mirabel : No, it isn't even half. You're impudent, egotistical, presumptuous, and fresh.
Sandro : All right, I'll tell you what we'll do. I promise to change everything about myself, if you'll promise to stay exactly as you are.