Review of Teeth

Teeth (I) (2007)
5/10
Not something to get your teeth stuck into
16 August 2007
Warning: Spoilers
Horror films have long used myth and psychological demons as a basis for gruesomeness. Teeth takes an underused legend (vagina dentata) and eats into the late night chick-flick gore-fest market with gusto and relish.

Hold on - late night chick-flick gore-fest market? Isn't it just guys who go to see slasher stuff? Instead of vampires deflowering virgins we have a virgin de-penis-ing sleaze bags. Not so much I Spit on Your Grave as bible-thumping-bimbo-eats-willies.

In one of the South Park episodes ('Red Hot Catholic Love'), that asks 'why Catholics must molest children,' we had a sect of Catholicism made of dangerous aliens. Their females have vaginas lined with razor-sharp teeth. South Park, of course, is unashamedly anti-everything polemic. Whereas Teeth is just entertainment. The lasting impact of such materials however, can be influenced by how well writer-producers have done their homework on matters psychological.

Blonde high-schooler Dawn is a prominent representative of a chastity-ring -style movement. She discovers she has unusual anatomical 'adaptations' down there'. (She also has that expression that says something is permanently lodged up her butt.) But after she has alternately repelled and then encouraged a sweetheart who then rapes her, she is not unreasonably convinced that the bloody stump he is left with - and the dismembered member subsequently eaten by crabs - is the result of her deformity. Notwithstanding this, she manages to attract a series of pervs who get their fingers or manhoods lopped off.

Teeth has the potential to deliver some biting social comment on the 'chastity' movement which has infected some American schools. In the classroom, Dawn's biology textbooks have stickers obscuring diagrams of the vulva - for 'obvious' reasons.

At one point there, is a chance Dawn could become the crusader with a moral calling (rather than faith obedience). Much like the Troma legend, Toxic Avenger, who hunts down the city's bad guys. In a scene where a serial seducer drugs Dawn and then offers candlelight and romance to conclude the deed, is mistakenly seen as a 'good guy' by our heroine. She amazingly has successful sex with him, and willingly. She thinks he has fulfilled her dreams. But, when he boasts to mates on the phone in flagrante delicto, she changes her mind and chops it off. If the punishment was a little heavy for just being a loudmouth, there is a sense of justice as we know his intentions had nothing to do with consent. But although Dawn feels remorse over a similarly lecherous gynaecologist, she has no compunction about deliberate entrapment of males that she credits with evil intentions. And she does so as the heroine of our film.

The vagina dentata myth is, as the film rightly points out, based on men's fear of sex. Compounding it with the modern craze by some youngsters for 'chastity' blurs the underlying psychology, even as a crowd-pleaser. The chaste woman in the sense upheld by Dawn's religious beliefs is the opposite of all that is pure about the symbols of womanhood. A shutting up, a mental 'castration,' to be reversed only by marriage. A cult that possibly even exacerbates sexual crime resulting from frustration, while denying a woman her own sexuality (A more extreme form is the barbaric practice in some countries of 'female circumcision.') The clarion call to support the heroine (who is depicted sympathetically) rests on an idea of female dominance as repugnant as the male domination of old patriarchal societies. It has developed, particularly in the USA, where American wives may even speak of husbands as men in the past spoke of a 'good, hard-working drudge'.

The end credits quip that, "No man was harmed in the making of this film." But this reviewer at least feels that women who are psychologically conditioned to think in terms of 'chastity' or 'castrating men' are indeed harming themselves.

To its credit, Teeth handles the difficult acting challenges with considerable aplomb. Jess Weixler's portrayal of Dawn is well-nuanced and brings much needed humour, ambivalence and self-doubt to her character. That the film succeeds at all is remarkable, and this first feature by writer-director Mitchell Lichtenstein bodes well for his capabilities in handling difficult subject matter in the future commercial market. He succeeds in breathing life into a well-worn genre, but at the expense of ditching his moral compass. While the film is entertaining, it fails to achieve its full potential, or the cult status of indie classics like Liquid Sky (which was written by women rather than a man). But it certainly beats yet another slasher re-run with female protagonists enthusiastically chopping carrots.
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