Bloodsuckers (1997)
1/10
Pseudo-Fassbinderian dreck masquerading as a horror film
13 November 2000
Director Ulli Lommel's mock-Fassbinder teenie thriller is a wholly unconventional vampire movie.... it's not about vampires at all, except on some obscure metaphorical level. Michelle Bonfils plays a girl who wants to join a vampire school (?), where Angelo the vampire (Lommel) tries to talk her out of it. Most of this interminable talk-fest has to do with a theatrical stage, where a bunch of drugged-out kids battle each other while adults watch in the audience. It's all a police plot to subdue homeless people. The commentary and symbolism is very obvious, and Lommel directs at a dilge-like pace. The "look" of the movie is very old-fashioned, I thought I was watching some 70s exploitation movie (but without any violence, action, or T&A). Lommel seems unsure if he's making a horror flick or a social satire, but no matter how you cut it, it's BAD. I was impressed with Lommel's horror movies of the 1980s, such as "The Boogeyman," but after years on Hollywood's poverty row, it looks like he can't make anything other than mini-budgeted vanity products.
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