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Reviews
The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power (2022)
Ok if it didn't say Lord of the Rings
One LOTR fan to another: just don't compare it to the movies. You will be disappointed.
I write this after only 2 episodes but I strongly doubt the star rating will change.
Firstly Galadriel's 'quest' is so very briefly and insufficiently explain that you are left questioning what she's actually doing.
The actress, whether by director choice or because she's a bad actor, is completely emotionless. Literally. She's also haughty and dislikeable. Again not sure who's to blame.
There are several lines of dialogue identical to the LOTR movie. Not amused.
Also some elves had a deceiving nature... That didn't ring true with what I knew.
There were a lot of general cliches (I won't give any away) that just seem lazy writing.
The build up was VERY very slow. There were too many storylines and not enough progression. Too many characters, with very little depth. Not a single character was rounded enough that you knew them.
Dwarf doors are invisible when closed. Just saying.
CGI was hit and miss.
On a small positive:
I liked Elrond. He had style akin to Hugo Weaving.
I liked Disa and Durin. They had good chemistry and there was nothing in-your-face woke.
I didn't mind the introduction of new races as this reflects what has been lost since LOTR.
I liked Nori. She was comic relief like Perrin. She had the most emotion of all characters.
The scenery was breathe taking.
Thirteen Lives (2022)
Very watchable
No overdramatising here.
Great acting! And yet, despite 3 a-list actors I also wouldn't say they carried the film. It was very much a shared film between the well known and not well known. Which was great.
At least a third was in original Thai language so this added authenticity.
Very little composed music, which is good because you're not relying on added drama.
As I understand, this story, unlike many 'true stories' is closely accurate to actual events. It was tense and not at all boring. Very unpretentious. It would have been nice to have seen more of the other aspects of the rescue, such as the 'water guy' and his role. And yet the film was already 2.5hrs long and it didn't feel dragged.
The dynamics between the actors was great. Very unpretentious. No unnecessary frills. The actors did their own stunts and it paid off because the reality of the situation the film was portraying was brought to life.
My singular criticism is that Viggo Mortensen's English accent sounded at times more African. But I forgive him because I love him.
North & South (2004)
Watchable
Story: good, slow burning, but watchable enough
Costumes: fairly accurate
Setting: as above
Music: as above and not overused
Casting: here there's a problem. Daniela Denby-Ashe is the only one stiff and unemotional. Whether angry, sad or happy her face never changes.
If she was re-cast (and the brother because he's a drip) it would make for a better programme.
Lo imposible (2012)
Emotional
Ok, the beginning part where they 'develop' the adult characters is cringe worthy.
As for the rest... harrowing, realistic, scary.
I cry every time at the end.
The Wheel of Time (2021)
Don't compare to books!!
This is a VERY LOOSE adaptation.
I'd advise anyone to enjoy it for what it is rather than make a comparison.
Start thinking about the book and you'll find the series a disappointment.
Acting good.
Setting good.
The casting is diverse for the sake of diversity.
Actually plot... questionable. Overly heavy on feminism. And I'm a woman. Certain story points have been removed, which is expected, while others have been added for no good reason. I refer to the whole of episode 4. Also some areas have been undermined: Mat's dagger.
A mixed bag.
Better, as I say, to pretend it's not based on the book. And even then, the 'added' scenes/ plots, do not enhance the overall story, so seem a bit pointless.
The Wheel of Time (2021)
Don't compare to books!!
This is a VERY LOOSE adaptation.
I'd advise anyone to enjoy it for what it is rather than make a comparison.
Start thinking about the book and you'll find the series a disappointment.
Acting good.
Setting good.
The casting is diverse for the sake of diversity.
Actually plot... questionable. Overly heavy on feminism. And I'm a woman. Certain story points have been removed, which is expected, while others have been added for no good reason. I refer to the whole of episode 4. Also some areas have been undermined: Mat's dagger.
A mixed bag.
Better, as I say, to pretend it's not based on the book. And even then, the 'added' scenes/ plots, do not enhance the overall story, so seem a bit pointless.
Mary Queen of Scots (2018)
2hrs of my life I won't get back.
Margot Robbie was the best part
The inaccuracy of the plot, accents, characters is painful.
Mary was FRENCH.
Mary never met Elizabeth.
Mary was not a character that inspired sympathy.
Mary's storyline seemed very pointless.
Elizabeth's storyline was subtle, sad and reasonably accurate.
The Witcher (2019)
Naff
For anyone who has not read the book, myself included, this is a complete mess. Too many character names and places are dropped you have no bloody idea who is who or where you are. It took until episode 3 to realise that Gerult, Ciri and Yen's storyline are at all different times yet there is no clear indication to show the different passages of time. Gerult was likeable until his relationship with Yen. Yen is a b***h. Enough said. She's meant to be really powerful but we see no evidence to suggest she is extraordinary. Ciri seems pointless until right at the end. Also can someone please explain what in the name of hell is the Law of Surprise! I was not aware at first that Gerult's 'storyline' is episodic. Queen Clanthe is badly cast. Way too young to be Ciri's nan, it just added to the confusion. Between the multiple names, time swaps and utterly, pointless cringing sex it is dreadful. The stars are for Henry's acting, stage sets and fighting.
The Strangers (2008)
No substance
The cameraman should be fired. Shaky AF!
No character depth. Lots of empty silences. Very tiny backstory.
Idiot characters. I couldn't tell whether they had moved in, the killers knew the house better than they did!
Many opportunities to leave. Didn't leave. Made more noise than a toddler when they should have been silent.
First 20mins had lots of suspense but stupidity let the rest of the film down.
Bird Box (2018)
Nothing like the book
I think what should be considered is that it is based on the book. So the idea, the premise, of creatures that cause suicides, and the setting of the house, is based based on the author's idea.
After that the entire story is very much left to the liberty of the director because it doesn't compare to the book.
The characters are all different and in some cases new.
Whilst I like Sandra Bullock, Malorie is meant to be 24 and never has a relationship with Tom. If you wanted a big name fine but this was badly cast.
The suspense in the book is rarely felt in the film and it's flat and doesn't reflect enough on Malorie's teachings on the children.
The best bit was Tom Hollander's character. Well cast.
Watch if you're curious but prepare for disappointment.
Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle (2017)
Funny and original
Loved the storyline and acting. Funny and modern.
Yes, there's CGI and it's not all great. But it doesn't take you out of story.
The Lion King (2019)
No circle. No life.
Truly awful voice acting. Absolutely no life.
Best bit for me was the Hakuna Matata song but that's not what I'm watching a film for.
CGI is CGI, it can look great but doesn't make up for bad voice acting either.
Complete waste of producers money. (And mine.)
I went straight home and watched the original. Much happier after.