danieljmcewen Reviews

Demon Squad (2019)

My ears!

[2/10 · 8 May 2022]

The story was whatever. Demon hunter/gumshoe falls for sexy client. They fight demons. Not original but that's fine.

The problem was the acting. It was atrocious. Watching wasn't bad but listening was another story. Might have been a better movie with the volume down and closed captioning on.

Redwoods (2009)

Not worth the watch

[2/10 · 18 April 2022]

The acting, the background music that sometimes overpowered the dialogue. I have no idea what was going on with Billy the son/stepson (don't know which he is). I liked Chase and I liked Shane. The rest were just weird. It's like the writer wanted you to think about that the characters should have said but without having anyone say it.

The ending was good and not because it ended. The visit was powerful but that was not about Chase than anything else. He was the kind of guy who could make an impact on those around him. Despite the ending, it was a boring movie DVD I can't recommend anyone take the time to watch it.

Voodoo Academy (2000 Video)

So bad it's bad

[2/10 · 8 April 2022]

Some movies are just bad. Not so bad it's good but bad. Really bad. The second star I gave was for the hot guys in underwear. There were no other redeeming values to this film.

I've seen movies with worse acting so that's technically a plus.

Vampire Boys (2011 Video)

Nothing good to say

[1/10 · 8 April 2022]

Boring story. Terrible acting. Terrible plot. Jasin is eternally 20? Laughable. Friend goes missing permanently? Who cares? I'll spend eternity with his murders. There so much bad in this. I liked Paul. He was the cutest and most well-rounded character. Also the best actor. Too bad he didn't get more screentime.

Triple Crossed (2013)

Entertaining

[6/10 · 25 March 2022]

I didn't think it was all that bad. It was a triple cross for sure but who was crossing who? It was a light-hearted movie, despite it being about assassination and greed, there was some fun to it. As long as you know it's not meant to be overly serious it should help you to see it in a different light.

Everlasting Love (2014)

Really creepy

[3/10 · 25 March 2022]

I was okay with it in the beginning. "Boy" meets man while cruising. Boy is smitten but it's largely a one-way street. All of this is fine. Then we have the end. It is twisted and disturbing.

Vampires: Brighter in Darkness (2011)

Scary movie

[1/10 · 23 March 2022]

This is terrible. The acting, every vampire seeming to be gay and hot and incomprehensible plots. Plus, v vampires have high tech inside of ancient pyramids?

During an airplane trip we see a view of the plane from above. It's a plastic toy airplane being moved through clouds. When a vampire jumps off and lands in an Egyptian desert, there's a vaguely pyramid shaped pile of dirt. Doesn't even look like a pyramid.

One and only good things about this movie are the hot guys.

Lurking Fear (1994)

True horror

[2/10 · 21 March 2022]

You have to look away and even then there's no guarantee the monster won't get you. Yes, this movie i is almost impossible to watch. It's not "so bad it's good". No, instead we have "so bad I wish I could wipe it from my memory." There's nothing good about this movie.

You're Killing Me (2015)

Bizarre

[6/10 · 13 April 2021]

I related in the beginning in the sense that I made fun of for lacking knowledge of things deemed gay culture. All in fun, of course. That's the end.

The movie was probably best described as black comedy. The stuff happening no one knows about is crazy. A little too crazy, especially given what Joe was doing. Funny how it made him happy and helped him find love.

It was an unexpected ending for me but also not strange. Though it was interesting I wouldn't call it a work of art. If you're bored and have nothing to watch, give it a go.

The Speed of Thought (2011)

Intriguing movie for the genre

[7/10 · 28 March 2021]

A group of telepaths called Scopers have power but it comes with a fairly short lifespan. No one lives past 29.

On a mission for the NSA, Joshua encounters another Scoper, unknown to the NSA. This leads to a change for Joshua and down a new path.

We eventually learn the cause of the early deaths but I figured it out pretty early on in the movie. It made sense.

The wrap up was nice but a little too "happily ever after".

Encounter (II) (2018)

Don't waste your time

[3/10 · 25 February 2021]

Vague plot. You never really know what's going on or why this creature is going what it is. Then the ending, if you can call or that. It came out of nowhere. Worse still, everyone happily accepted the results.

I'm trying to avoid spoilers of any kind. The best I can say is that it was a bad story where the writer didn't know how to end and so just stopped.

A Deadly Legend (2020)

Do not waste even a minute on this

[1/10 · 2 February 2021]

The writing was absolute trash, as was the acting. This is not a case of "it's so bad it's good". If the prior two sentences aren't enough of a warning then you have my pity.

Happy Endings Sleepover (2019)

Worst CIA agent ever

[4/10 · 1 February 2021]

Johnnie is terrible at his job. Johnnie falls in love. A mission is treated like a road trip. I'd rate it lower but I loved Sander. He was a bright spot in the movie. He came across as the most genuine character to be found.

Nightwish (1989)

A disgrace to bad movies

[1/10 · 4 January 2021]

I'm trying to think about what could have been good in this movie. It's not a case of "it's so bad it's good". It's just mad.

The acting was atrocious. The professor behaved like a villain pretty much from the start. The students aren't especially intelligent. Not necessarily needed for participation in an experiment so that's not the worst thing.

Too many variables in play. Per the description there were ghosts, aliens and satanic entities. Hard to focus on what elements are at play at any given time.

I have no problem with horror movies being campy. My problem here is that it wasn't fun to watch. I found it boring. I stuck through to the end but I regret it. The ending didn't leave me satisfied.