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CraigNewman1973
Reviews
Werewolf by Night (2022)
Yay!
The director of this homage is not only very skilled and in his direction, but music composition as well, Brilliant. Taking all que's from universal horror, expressionist cinema et al with dashes of humour (from said era's) make it a delight for anybody in the know. Good stuff, make more! (Longer)
*Edit*
Sorry, I guess I'll have to make up enough characters up in order to submit... Err? I thought I gushed enough about the film as it was? Tra lala... Was this always necessary? I'm sure on other reviews I kept it short and sweet? And I've still got 66 characters left! 27 now. 16. The film is great!
Mayhem (2017)
Contrived.
The was the second attempt at trying to watch this film as in all honesty I'd forgotten why I switched it off originally... And it was mainly down to one word, contrived. This sort of movie is usually up my street, but the try hard nature just put me off, over acting, implausibility, just everything screams 'me too'. It just amounts to flashy muddled direction, lazy script and tons of fake blood. A very Poor four.
Alma's Not Normal (2020)
Who gives this 1 star?
Seriously, are there people out there with no funny bone? It's proper gritty Northern humour, don't like it? Sod off and watch bloody friends. I'm a Northern lad and quite a lot of this resonates with me, similar situations and such (not escorting, but I'm free 😉) Sophie Willan has done a fine job at making me laugh... You go girl.
Cyst (2020)
This needs higher reviews...
My what a glorious little comedy/horror piece. It deserves more praise. Idiots putting it down, need putting down. Reminded me a lot of re-animator... Good stuff indeed.
The Devil's Rock (2011)
Oh my...
What a startling little horror film, that caught me Totally off guard. As an aficionado of horror I just have to give this 9 stars. Great acting, great direction, great script, and last but not least, great gore! Bravo!
Flower Boy (2019)
Eh?
Are all these reviews via shills or something? This is so badly acted and directed it's untrue...I had to turn off after 10 minutes because the female 'actors' were atrocious, then we had the fact that it looked like it was shot with a steady cam from the 80's (apart from the fact it wasn't steady at all, just crap quality and all over the place) utter rubbish. As I live in the UK stuff like this just doesn't happen. One assumes this child like director thought it was a good premise... It wasn't. Amateurish at best.
Prisoners of the Ghostland (2021)
Personally i thought this was great fun.But...
It has been brought down in score by (one assumes) American armchair critics who don't know their arse from their elbow...Ever heard of Akira kurosowa? He blended westerns with Samurai. This had it all, and for once Cage wasn't that bad. Action, gore, cyberpunk.... What's not to like? Don't listen to the idiots who gave this a 1 (just because they don't understand symbolism or even culture for that matter) Give it a pop (corn) watch and just be entertained for a while.
Unsane (2018)
Armchair critics...
Probably American, just don't have a bloody clue. I thought it was tightly scripted and had enough pace too keep me engaged... Maybe these people don't have hd TVs? But my view of the imagery was super fine. Keep it down, idiots.
Funny Cow (2017)
As per usual...
Americans can't seem to grasp our concept of kitchen sink drama, they are the only ones marking this down as it's not a 'comedy' (quelle surprise bozos) It's marketed as a drama/comedy (there are funny bits in it) but it is in reality a dark tale of sexism in the north of England in the 70's. And the labour of love a woman put in. Either this or there are a lot of misogynists on here. Anyhow Maxine Peake puts in a powerhouse of a performance, as does the ever fantastic Paddy Considine. Solid 8.
The Toll (2021)
You are honestly asking for subtitles?
Americans bemuse me, asking for bloody subtitles, yet i seem to understand all of your accents? No wonder the world says 'dumb yanks'. On point, what an excellent little indie, full of the cream of British actors/comedians. Tight as a gnats chuff script, great acting and cinematography and lovely dark humour peppered throughout. Again i don't give 8's lightly but come on...Subtitles? (it had them for the welsh bits) Go and watch a bit of World cinema (And not Hollywood crud) this film was great. Well deserving of the 8, as it was written brilliantly. Meh, heathens make my blood boil. Anyway 8+ (just to anger the stupid)
The Inbetweeners (2012)
Oh my days...
A complete and utter insult to the UK original. Do yourselves a favour and skip this complete abomination. Everybody involved should be ashamed.
Pets United (2019)
Excellent animation...BUT!
I honestly can't believe i watched this tripe. Excellent animation (all done in China), marred by a terrible script (all done in America) with terrible voice actors (i couldn't even be bothered to look them up)
AVOID!!! (and if you have kids make them avoid also) so many stereotypes it's untrue. What a waste of talent. (I.e The Chinese animators) Absolutely awful film.
Filth (2013)
Nice too see yanks...
Who have never read the novel (it's even worse with regards to vulgarity) Pro tip learn to read. In Scottish and stop marking this down (it just makes you as stupid as you already are)
Gangs of London (2020)
Some people are just plain stupid.
What is there not to like here? Great acting (always been a fan of Joe Cole) some great direction (the upside down shots had my head turning) and fantastic action and gore (as i grew up as a gore hound, i can't get enough) from all the way back (horror wise) to Tod Browning and Freaks. If you don't get it, don't watch it. But to give one star is unacceptable.
The Kevin Bishop Show (2008)
Aw, come on...
This was a great show, no idea why somebody gave it 6?? Funny as, and I'm going back via 4od. His spoofs are bloody clever. And Star stories was brilliant as well. Shame he's not on the screen anymore??
Warcraft (2016)
Aw come on you detractors...
It takes a lot of verve to pull something like this off, special credit goes to the CGI team and soundtrack.
Ok the story is somewhat limited (But what did you expect coming from a video game? ) Personally (and i'm a big fan of LOTR) I found this strong and stable in a universe that is based on an ye old tropes.
People in basements (cellars) messing around on a computer game (and consider this rubbish are mindless idiots) ...I Think the franchise (film wise) should continue.
Cruel Hearts (2018)
What a fantastic indie....
I'm no shill (i'm from the UK for crying out loud) but this little piece is expertly crafted Granted it's a bit patchy, but i think the director and actors involved were great, plus the writing was superb..A great ride, and one hopes the director goes on to bigger and better things. Solid 9 for effort alone.
Nighty Night (2004)
The people underscoring this are idiots.
Julia Davis is so underrated its untrue..this series garnered 4 awards for crying out loud...It has a medley of the best British comic talent, and yet one reviewer labeled it as a 1 star? They are either American (and don't get it) or morons that don't get it.
Julia Davis plays the biggest 'Cant' (if you're British you'll get that) in the world, and is hilarious in her written role (by herself) role as Jill.
The sheer audacity when people undermine a talented female writer/actress should be ashamed of themselves
What have YOU done exactly? Oh write a negative review on Imdb...
You should check out her other work. I don't care if her work is as black as a Black hole. She's incredibly talented, And extremely funny.
You go girl!
Starred Up (2013)
Top movie, intensive... You have to know it, to know it.
Quite possibly the best English prison drama to come out since Scum. Everyone who rates this down is either American, or not from our isles.
You Might Be the Killer (2018)
Clever...
A very smart, funny slasher flick that literally turns the genre on its head. Kudos to the director / writer. Thoroughly enjoyed this effort...
211 (2018)
Painting by numbers...
You like wood? Great, just check out the 'acting' in this abomination. A shame as the camera work is actually ok, but the bloody acting ( if you can call it that) is so stilted and forced it's untrue. I'm about 20 minutes in, but I'm a glutton for punishment... I'll sit through this crap so you don't have too. Yep I'm a martyr.
Ok, I've finished it, my opinion hasn't changed, it's bloody awful... Infact I'm knocking a star off from 4 to 3... So contrived it made my eyes bleed.