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Reviews
Inheritance (2020)
Convoluted at best
This movie is just a series of stupid choices. All I took away from this is that the world revolves around stupid and these are the people in power. If that was the writer's intention he nailed it. You're going to have a lot of moments of that's pretty stupid or that doesn't make sense.
We are dealing with D. A.'a, lawyers, politicians and CEO's yet one singular guy that was chained up for 30 years for NO reason. Let me reiterate that last part he should've been dead. They had 30 plus years to just kill this "very evil man" but no. We actually involve our clueless daughter into this. This is a lifetime movie with a better production value.
Secret Society (2021)
A misrepresentation of trans women
This has to be one of the most egregious portrayals of trans women ever put to film. I don't know where the writer sourced his material but I wonder if they ever met a trans person. It played into stereotypes and for 2022 I think we are beyond that. Do better.
Last Night in Soho (2021)
It got this many stars because of Anya
This writer hates women. The dialogue between the women at the fashion school was deplorable. I cannot imagine any self actualized adult speaking that way. They sounded and were painted as a bunch of just true skunks. After awhile it was almost satirical. With some stretch I can imagine some really dumb highschoolers speaking this way but I don't, nobody I know does and I haven't ever come across another adult woman that speaks like this.
Gwledd (2021)
Quite slow with little to no reward
The protagonist came off quite slow as in mentally challenged for most of the movie. It was an unusual acting choice. I guess they were going for curiosity or wonderment. She is definitely a local forest spirit or sprite and not Mother Nature as most suggest. In one scene they are cutting up melon (a food foreign to the area and having to be shipped in as the mother points out) for a fruit tray and when she tastes it she put it down in disgust however when offered local food from the farm she ate ravenously. Also she only came out to stop the development for the sole fact it would disturb the local area which has been up until the events in the movie untouched. I just wish the pace moved along faster.
It also falls apart on repeated watching. She arrives with her hair wet and we later find out her car crashed into a lake at the very beginning, yet her clothes were dry. She left the two dead rabbits for the father yet acted as if they were the most disgusting things she ever saw when asked to dress them for the pot. The last 10-15 mins was where all the action was condensed however the rest of the movie was pretty one note till that point. The shock value bits seemed like just that. A cheap ploy as some of it didn't fit with the theme of the movie.
Gayniggers from Outer Space (1992)
Under parents guide
There is NO sex or nudity in this. No sex scenes and everyone is fully clothed the entire time. Not sure how it got a severe under the parents guide section.
Tore tanzt (2013)
Good movie
I hate when movies say "based on true events" with no further reference. It sometimes comes off as a marketing ploy. Unless and until the movie provides the inspiration material, it's nothing more than pure fiction and nothing else. Now this completely voids the necessity to put that it's based on real events in the first place.
The Possession (2012)
A father surrounded by 3 stupid b!tches
I felt bad for the dad. He was a fine, caring, upstanding person. His ex wife and daughters came off as huge ungrateful obstacles. I kept wondering what he was fighting for and why. His family was ungrateful, judging, unloving. They threw him under the bus so fast. The youngest daughter starts acting unhinged, erratic AND violent on numerous occasions yet everyone believed the father (who never touched her) was all of a sudden slapping her etc. To reiterate, the ONLY one acting out of sorts throughout the entire film was the daughter yet somehow the very normal acting always upstanding dad gets dragged. Make it make sense. The ex wife was just a piece of work. I cared nothing for her and was rooting for her to die. Actually I wanted someone to die and unfortunately none of them did. That's how bad it was. I rooted for no one in this film. Even the father dying would've been better because at least he'd get to escape the 3 ungrateful hateful b!tches he's burdened with.
AlRawabi School for Girls (2021)
Based on episode one.
This is based on episode 1. Um where do I start? I will give it up till episode 3 but tbh it went from good to bad to dumb.
Is school like this? Never have I ever in the history of school heard a bully say "do you know who my father is?" Nobody cared, you can see me with them hands. I never saw cliques of bullies just walking around like they own the place. People attempted to bully but if one has any sense of self respect (which they made the main character Marian out to be from the beginning) you fought back in some way every time. Students were not allowed to run, disrespect or talk down to staff and faculty. I also went to school with a mix of backgrounds including quite affluent kids. One of my friends drove to school in a Porsche or Jeep.
It made me happy and grateful I did NOT go to a school like that. I hope the show gets better but if this is what we're perpetuating to our young adults we need to re-evaluate and maybe stop setting these stories in a high school.
College perhaps or a setting where it's a 19 yr old and up group but I have a theory why the setting is always a HS, because the main characters are too stupid at points which still doesn't excuse the behavior of the never seen and many times useless adults in these depictions. Better writing. Smarter choices. Make it make sense without the tired and unrealistic tropes.
Beyond the Black Rainbow (2010)
Artsy for the sake of being artsy
I hate when a film could cut about 20 mins or more or footage and be better. One does not need to watch a phone ring for 30 seconds or a man swallow a pill for 20 seconds. It was long and dragged out for no reason and I get setting up mood or whatever but pacing should be a concern and if it adds nothing to the story then perhaps trim the fat. Slow pace doesn't have to be boring but give me something to watch please.
Kim Bok-nam salinsageonui jeonmal (2010)
The ending was bullish!t
Great movie but the lead was a POS in the beginning and a POS at the end. She went through no true growth or redemption arc. The one who suffered through the entire movie was mercilessly killed even tho she reached out and kept hope throughout the entire film. The writing was lazy by thinking the POS lead after given one opportunity after the other to do the right thing had redemption because she pointed her finger at 1 criminal at the end. It was so stupid.
I Care a Lot (2020)
I rooted for no one!
This was bleak and quite frankly a kick in the face to lesbians. Pike who here is just a piece of nasty work is of course a lesbian because all lgbt people are bottom of the barrel villains. Why not?!? A trope I wish Hollywood would abandon. Not one of the characters except the guy who shoots at the end were worth rooting for. If they all ended up suffering the worst of fates it would be ok. Also the Russian mafia should sue for defamation. This movie really made them out to be bumbling idiots.
Antebellum (2020)
Not that good.
Had higher hopes for this movie. There were so many great places they could've gone with it but decided not to. The twist was sub par and came off like a disappointing Shyamalan "reveal" and you can just imagine the collective groan an audience would make, the eye rolls and shoulder shrugs of "that's really it?"
The highlight was janelle monae, the acting was good and the production value was on point. Her outfits and looks were also on point. As far as the general story that would be a no for me. I could've been witchcraft, voodoo, a parallel universe, a curse, legit time travel, memories of her ancestors because of her activism work. Any of these would've worked better than what they came up with. The most satisfying part of the movie was the way she dispatched with the 3 horrid men as far as Malone's character went I felt she could've been dragged and put through the ringer more. She looked to pristine upon her death. At least give us something to have fun with at the end!
Borderland (2007)
The climax was disappointing
So you go through this ride of gory horror where the major villains really put their victims through the paces and when waiting for them to get the ultimate justice, their minions and background players get the worse of it while the major villains (2 in this movie) basically get dispatched quickly with gunshots to the head. Sean Astin's death was the only satisfactory one in this movie. It's almost like the directors are afraid of their own creations and don't want to disrespect them or something. I would love for a horror director to finally give the audience the satisfaction they deserve by giving these heinous villains the death they actually deserve, something Very very looooooooooooong drawn out and extremely torturous.
Krampus (2015)
Nope!
Production values Check. A list Actors like Toni Collette Check. The rest of the movie as far as storyline, plot, continuity, or even sense then NO. Krampus comes for badly behaved children but Max was not a bad kid. He got into a fight in the opening sequence that was later explained as a bully bothering him. Idk about you but a 10 yr old scrapping once doesn't warrant his entire family and him basically going to hell for eternity. The ending was trite, unnecessary and the movie itself is just a stream of disconnected tropes. The family dynamic wasn't enough to make their fate seem deserved. Krampus takes evil wicked immoral children. Max throughout the entire film acted like a typical normal child for his age. Why was Krampus even there let alone set upon punishing what the film showed was a normal kid is beyond me, because he ripped a letter and tree it out his window! The parents in this were more problematic and not even Max's parents came off that terrible. The aunt and uncle were decidedly heinous but again this had no bearing on the outcome. The finale seemed like a rushed stretch and the movie left you feeling like wtf did I just watch and I can't get my 1.5 hours of my life back. If you want to waste time I'd recommend this but other than that watch Hereditary with Toni Colette and forget this travesty.