sifu_annie Reviews

Withnail & I (1987)

Dedicated for a most beloved colleague who didn't think I'd like this movie

[8/10 · 24 October 2023]

Jodie was right - there was very little that I could relate to with my current lifestyle however I did enjoy watching someone else fall into such depths of despair. I wanted to give the movie a 7 for its range and humour - I thought it was genuinely funny in a serious-unserious self-deprecating way - however I begrudgingly settled on the 8 because I also valued its authenticity.

With-nuhl with all of his dramatics makes a fine actor and entertainer however we see how absolutely wasted he is with his corrupted body and soul. Anyone with half a brain can tell you that he's being stupid and that he needs to work on himself if he wants to rescue himself from his impending life of destitution and fulfill his dreams of playing the Dane (Hamlet) - he later plays Hamlet in front of a few zoo animals which is unfortunately the only kind of audience he deserves in the end. Pulling yourself together is really not difficult - all you need to do is go back to the basics like we see 'I' do multiple times - in the end 'I' gets a haircut and understands that he needs to cut his losses if he wants to move ahead in life; common sense to Jodie and in no way as profound as some pretentious artists make it out to be however I suppose this revelation may be profound to the unenlightened.

Do I like this movie? I love the characters and their chemistry: Withnuhl, Monty and I make a terrifically unhappy trio. A lot of the characters we meet are all deranged and gross and the sort no decent person would want to associate themselves with. However 'I' comes across as a breath of fresh air in this bleak world - his inner commentaries are a safe anchor for the viewer, and without him the film would have been a flop.

Jodie - I am so sorry that I didn't get around to watching 'Body on the Beach: What Happened to Annie?' It was not meant to be. Stay safe and well wherever it is that you exist.

Justice League Dark: Apokolips War (2020 Video)

Cringe-fest from beginning to end

[3/10 · 1 July 2020]

• The Justice League were completely out of character at the beginning of the movie.
• Gore-fest and misery-porn throughout the bulk.
• John Constantine becomes the weird protagonist of this weird movie. The most cliché of British stereotypes included to create cheap laughs and pander to the dimwits of the English-speaking world.
• Cop-out ending. Love and destiny saves the day which begs the question why couldn't it save the world earlier on? They just force-fed us an unbelievably dumb plot. Suspension of disbelief is good and all but there was too much retardation involved for my own liking.
• The script was bland and boring. It wasn't witty or edgy at all -- just cringy.
• Raven was literally a plot device and had no other purpose and use in the entire movie which was very frustrating to watch. They did her dirty.
• I really regret wasting 90 minutes of my life on this piece of faeces. At least the effects were decent.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (2013–2020)

The show just got better and better

[9/10 · 17 May 2014]

I remember how I felt after watching the first episode. It was 'meh' to describe it best. I think it was only out of sheer boredom I continued to watch it. I especially didn't like Skye. I found her too intrusive and irritating for my liking. But I knew the show still had some potential. The other characters entranced me. Sure the plot was bland and boring but I knew it was only the first few episodes out of twenty two. This meant there was room for development. And by gum did that last episode delivered.

The things with new series are is that they require patience. You have to be very picky if you expect an amazingly complicated plot right at the beginning. A slow start makes sense. It matters on where the show takes us afterwards. And we've been to a lot of places in AoS. It just took time to pull everything together for a neat finish. And I'm glad they took their time; how else are we able to achieve such a deep and rich relationship with all the characters?

I find it really funny how some of the viewers are still bitching about how there were no major SUPERheroes featured in the show. Well, the show made it clear that it was gonna be about the agents and the strength of humanity. Who cares the mains don't have any superpowers? It made me admire them only more.

This show lacked nothing at the end. But perhaps I shall give it a nine for the minor inconvenience of the first couple of episodes.

Only Lovers Left Alive (2013)

Wow. Sexy, intelligent and powerful.

[9/10 · 5 May 2014]

First of all, I want to compliment Jim Jarmusch on how he was able to create and sustain such a dark but very delicate tone in the duration of this movie; of course, compliments to Jozef van Weissem and SQÜRL for the amazing music that helped keep the edgy vibe going. Seriously, the music is top notch. It has that very hypnotic and charming Gothic rock tune to it but there's also this indescribable distorted metallic undertone that helps keep the feeling gritty, humble, melancholic and somewhat industrial. I don't know, maybe I'm just rambling but the classy haunting mood expressed in the chords was probably the one thing that, personally, had the biggest impact on me.

But that's not to say that there isn't anything else to talk about. There was a very well sustained amount of dry humour in the script and, honestly, the movie made me laugh quite hard several times despite the repetitive waves of bleakness and hopelessness that I could feel being emitted by Adam.

It could be argued that this movie was awful since it lacked the conventional amount of substance and action but I found it quite lively in an odd, living-dead, muted sort of way. The movie was fun in my opinion. Even though only a few things happen in this movie, the sheer class, quality and style expressed by the director and the performances by the actors were enough to satisfy me. The movie looks much deeper into love, human condition and life than is normally seen in a romance movie. The focus was more focused on a very healthy, mutual and endearing relationship between two lovers -- thrice-married, I think -- and I guess we just learn at the end of it that they'll continue to endure their immortal existence with each other by their side, despite their differences.

I wouldn't classify this as a horrific vampire movie because I believe that Jarmusch only added the entire vampire concept to capture the timelessness and the everlasting themes of nostalgia and loss that are expressed through the characters. I love this couple to bits. Sure they come across as snobs but they're both extremely intelligent, civil and compassionate -- well, we don't see really see much of that last thing in Adam much, more like a rigid command of tolerance.

Also, the settings and visuals are stunning. Detroit: the isolation, the decay, the ruin and the slow deterioration of all things considered good in life and the declining state of morality and purity in humankind -- contamination comes into mind -- which pretty much reflects the thoughts of Adam and Eve. They pretty much, overall, despise us zombies -- or perhaps I've gone a bit too far in my interpretation?

The truth of the matter lies that this movie has a lot of thought put into it and it is so rich and vivid with it that people like me are literally drooling over the movie's awesomeness. The movie suggests that no matter how many times society may crumble around the pair, they will both survive through the ordeals together, and no matter now much they might change after every century or so, Adam and Eve will continue to love, support and look out for each other. These two understand each other deeply and know each other so very well that I guess it is their intimacy and passion that fuels the mood and tone of the movie that I had mentioned previously.

So to conclude: this is why the movie is called Only Lovers Left Alive and this is why you should watch it.

Coriolanus (2011)

Spectacularly amazing.

[9/10 · 5 May 2014]

Great performances by the cast, well directed, plenty of drama on Shakespeare's part -- what more can you ask for in a great movie? I love Shakespearean tragedies; they always hit so close home to me, every time, so I wonder why the movie has scored such a low number on IMDb so far?

Tell me, is it the old tongue that daunts you so? I think the movie made the language extremely accessible to us without straying too far from source material; that, in its own right, is truly meritorious.

I myself have never been a fan of Shakespeare before. I always thought his plays to be dull, unmoving and a fanciful dullard's play. Perhaps it was the numerous times in secondary school where we'd have cold readings of the script in my classroom and the very rare allowances of real, live, professional performances in actual theatre houses that made me feel this way. I blame this on the incompetence of most of my English teachers since, at times, I didn't get what it was they were trying to teach us -- and they were speaking plain English to us in the classroom, mind you!

Shakespeare wrote his plays to be performed and what a fine job Ralph Fiennes did at delivering the story to us! I actually was able to follow most of what was going on without referring to any footnotes since Coriolanus was originally a play I've never heard of -- I blame this majorally on the fact that popular culture hasn't brought the story up nearly as often as like, say, Othello or Macbeth. (Remember, I was never a fan of Shakespeare.)

The movie integrated a modern setting into the production -- and yes, I can already hear everyone's groans -- but Fiennes was able to pull it off like Luhrmann before him. There were done stunning visuals and all the blood and gore and violence made this two hour long viewing seem very brisk and fast-paced.

Yet, addressing all previous complaints about the characters speaking in a relatively tongue, if you can't understand what's going on then perhaps you should go away and learn a bit more of the English language. Or, you can perhaps be a little more sympathetic towards such movies like these so you don't sound like a unintelligible bitch moaning about how unfair the movie is to us common people. I must admit, this movie does have an appeal to a certain group of the audience but never forget that your 'we' should never be used as a poor substitute for 'I' because that's a little unfair to the movie, don't you think?

Alas, I've spent much of my time venting my frustration with other reviewers so let's get back to the gritty basics.

Coriolanus explores themes such as pride, patriotism, fascism, politics, war. It tells the tale of a man who's both contemptuous and admirable, asking us whether it is right to lay down your beliefs of what is fair and moral to the demands of the mob, for the sake of peace. Like many of Shakespearean adaptations, this movie is intelligent, insightful and perceptive of human nature and behaviour.

If this seems like a movie for you then grab a bag of popcorn because you'll enjoy this.