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valkillmore93
Reviews
The Yellow Birds (2017)
Not good
The glaring military inaccuracies aside, all I can say is why?
Why would he do that with his friend? And why the cover up by killing the old man who helped with the body? Why would anyone make the decision do that and seriously think that was the better choice?
I can't imagine a single person that would do that to someone they cared about, especially after meeting their parents knowing what that would do to them. Or the sargent agreeing going along with it. Come on.
This whole movie made zero sense. I'm not sure what they were trying to achieve with it.
I think I may have missed something that would explain it better, but I can't be bothered going back and watching it again to find out what it was I may have missed.
Hollywood is a lost cause at this point.
The Alienist (2018)
Bait & Switch
The bait : season one, The Alienist
the switch : season two, The Sarah Howard Detective Agency
This was a very clever attempt at luring some of us into yet another PC Hollywood creation. Normally they hit us with the woman power stuff right away. This show sucks you in with an interesting first season, then changes the story and all but sidelines the other main characters in the name of social justice, in season 2.
Where is the darned Alienist lol!?! Why has Mr. Moore suddenly been demoted to dog walker? Lol!
The first season really was very good, so the show still gets a decent rating, and for the amazing sets and costumes. Very well done, I just hope it steers back on course.
The Prodigy (2019)
A couple jumps...
...but that's about it. The part with the boy in his chair in his room and suddenly he had the killer's face creeped me out a little and the part when the boy morphed into the serial killer running down the hall was creepy. That's about it though. So I give it a couple extra stars for being the first 'horror' in a long time to creep me out, but that's all it was, just a little creepy.
I haven't really been freaked the eff out by a horror movie since I was about 10 yrs old, even in the times when CGI was all but non-existent and make up and special effects were nothing like they are today. They have to come up with something new. Between Hollywood killing comedy, stupid real-life Matrix action movies like John Wick, constant reboots made simply to force diversity or send a political message and terrible remakes at that, and with the lack of a good fright in decades, I can't see myself wasting time with very many movies after this.
Jacob's Ladder (2019)
It's bad enough....
....that they have to blackwash every single story or movie I've enjoyed in my life, but they could at least make it good if they're going to do a reboot. This was a hot mess of I dunno what. I made it about 50 minutes in, and had to shut it off.
This seems to be a common thing these days. Probably 70% of the time I shut movies off before they are finished, if I can stay awake long enough to shut it off, that is. Reboots these days, I barely make it into them before being disgusted or bored to death and passing out.
Garbage. Hollywood could disappear off the face of the earth tomorrow and I wouldn't shed a tear. It's dead. Move on.
Kidnap (2017)
Who writes this?
Lolz! Where did all the traffic go?
From the point just before both cars went off the road with the motorcycle policeman, not a single car anywhere.
Significant overpass, roads all around. Not a single car or truck rolls by and notices a cop laid out on the side of the road, or their vehicles. Then into the tunnel.....no cars. The kidnapper lady gets tossed out of the van in the tunnel, still no cars. Still no cars crossing the long bridges. No cars anywhere. Not for ages.
Utterly ridiculous. I've never seen any city like that. Even where I live you wouldn't see that unless it's maybe 3 in the morning.
It's like they burned the budget crashing the few vehicles early on in the chase and couldn't afford more rentals, driver's or extras lmao!
And why TF didn't she run them down on the side of the road? And was that cop dead? I assume he must have been. He never called in a pursuit?
I don't know what's going on in Hollywood these days. Comedy is being strangled to death, creativity is out the window, and continuity.......
I had to turn it off at about 45 minutes.
The Stand In (2020)
Hollywood is dead
Sell your shares in anything Hollywood. It's dying, and flailing around like a chimp on fire.
Perhaps we should rate movies these days by just how far we make it thru them. 28 minutes.
The Shallows (2016)
Dumb. Nice scenery, but stupid.
This movie was painful to watch.
Sharks don't stalk a 100 lb surfer when there's 35.6 metric tonnes of whale meat just floating nearby.
It certainly isnt going to drag the whale further out into the waters and try to knock her off.....more than likely it wouldn't even care that she was there. It would eat, and leave.
A flare gun on the buoy? Really? How long has it been sitting there? And it works still? Amazing! Especially considering rust rot was bad enough to have heavy gauge chains just break like they were balsa wood or something.
And the shark is going to attack a steel buoy? Again, while there is whale meat lurking nearby, but it wants her skinny bones, and is willing to destroy itself attacking a steel structure to get to her......lmao!! Ugh.
Oh. And the whale blubber lighting the water on fire.....give me a break. That made me crack up.
And the final death scene of the shark. Just staaaaaaaahp.
Who writes this stuff? Are these 12 yr old script writers? Does anyone research the subject matter they cover in TV or movies anymore? It's amazing in the days of instant access to information, people that write this stuff are so ill informed.
And I've never found Blake Lively that engaging as an actress, or even that attractive, like so many seem to, so she couldn't pull this mess out of the dumpster.
1 star because I have to, and 2 stars for the seagull.
The Tax Collector (2020)
3 stars for laughs....
Shia LaBeouf as a tough guy is about the most hilarious thing ever. First off he got his ass handed to him up in Canada at that night club. I saw the video. Whooped. Second, this is a "man" that cried when people stole his anti-Trump flag LOL!!!
I couldn't make it 15 minutes in and I had to turn it off. But thanks for the laughs.
Oh and someone is saying he got real tattoos for this role? Lmao if so!
Go home Shia, you're drunk.
The King (2019)
Not for Shakespeare fans or historians
They could have went with a portrayal as found in Shakespeare's writings, or they could have went with historically accurate. They chose neither and basically just made up history.
While visually stunning with great sets and good acting, I just don't see what they were trying to achieve here.