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Black Adam (2022)
Coherently done, which for DC...is a Masterpiece!
Storyline: C-
Dialogue: D+ (cringy)
Characters: C-
Visuals: A
Black Adam character: C (meh)
Atom Smasher: B- (He was a discount Antman in powers and personality, but not bad)
Cyclone: C (meh)
Dr. Fate: A (solid)
Hawkman: B- (why not)
Supporting actors (mom/son/uncle): D (horrendously wrote and acted, the uncle was kinda funny)
Villain: F- (No, just no, we have to do better)
McGuffin: F- (a crown or something, nah, nope)
The Rock: C+ (sigh) I mean, what do you expect from him at this point? He does the same role he does in every movie, he plays Dwayne Johnson. He barely had any lines in this movie. Sheesh. Luckily he is jacked and has charisma, because man, he still has zero acting ability. Also, he's not a believable anti-hero, so this kind of messes up the immersion.
Takeaways:
- Shoutout to Hawkman and Doctor Fate who tried to carry the movie with their friendship and acting.
- I would've taken a story centered around Doctor Fate instead. Pierce Brosnan showed up!
- Djimon Hounsou keeps getting criminally disrespected with these non-speaking type roles like he's not a top notch actor, smh.
- The backstory is awful. They tried to tie it back in with a twist towards the end, which helped it be not totally dumpster juice.
- If this was a world ending issue, where was the Justice League? Suicide Squad?
- Amanda Waller be talking reckless to everyone, lol
- Cameo by Superman at the end was dope.
- I mean at least it wasn't a total DC disaster.
- I like the people of color representation.
- Not cringy bad, not good, but very entertaining.
Old Henry (2021)
Why don't they make movies like this anymore?
This reminds me of the excellence that was The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford. I actually think it's a little better! If you love storytelling, subtle dialogue, twists that aren't given away, pacing character studies, characters you'll care about, storylines and themes that aren't overdone, coming of age stories that are realistic, villains that aren't over the top, supporting characters that also have depth, leading actors delivering at the top of their game, Westerns that are gritty, gore-y and gray...then this is a MUST SEE!!!!! YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT. And the finale??? Sheesh. PERFECTION.
The Contractor (2022)
Contract: Mid-level Exception
Not on par with classics like "Bourne," not nearly as beastly as "Extraction," a simple story, a thriller, great acting, realistic action and ops work. Chris Pine is legit, again he's no Matt Damon or Chris Hemsworth, not even Chris Evans or Chris Pratt, but he's believable.
My boy Ben Foster is a monster per usual stealing scenes. Kiefer Sutherland is out here looking EXACTLY like his pops and LITERALLY acts and sounds just like him, he played a good role.
Again, it's no "13 Hours" or anything, but it is a great watch and it's very refreshing as their making so much glittery garbage these days.
This does not have any twists, no climactic third act, no memorable car chases, shootouts or fight scenes, no incredible dialogue or set pieces, just pretty solid acting and believable outcomes. Enjoy.
The Man Who Fell to Earth (2022)
I started losing interest during the pilot!
I decided to continue to give it as much of a shot as I could because I love Chiwetel Ejiofor, but this is really bad.
1. Chiwetel Ejiofor cannot act his way out of this one because the script is so poorly written and the nature of him being an alien eliminates his acting ability because he literally has to act wooden as an alien.
2. Naomie Harris' character is horribly written and totally unbelievable as she is supposed to technically be one of the smartest people on earth. Her character does not make you feel like this is true.
3. Why is she working under the table at hazardous waste site? She's one of the smartest people on earth. I'm supposed to believe she really works there? Come on...
4. Her initial interactions upon meeting what she doesn't know is an alien is truly unbelievable. As someone who is supposed to be as intelligent as she is, you expect me to believe that she was this clueless and baffled by meeting the lead character. The questions she asked, the way she interacted with him, her lack of probing, none of these things gave me vibes that tells me she's a scientist.
5. The situation with her dad, his medication, his condition, all feels forced.
6. When she first met the lead character at the police station she was frightened by him, but it felt like she should've taken more time to try and figure out how he knew the things he knew about her. Again, she just doesn't feel like an intelligent scientist that put together an earthshaking thesis on fusion.
7. Parts of the script feel very goofy and TV sitcom-ish. Particularly, the parts with Edie and Hatch Flood in the way they run their company and the issues they have with each other and how everything between them is handled. It seems very "3 Stooges" instead of a huge tech company. It doesn't feel serious. The reason she fires him feels contrived and stupid and goofy.
8. I stopped watching this around episode 4 when Edie Flood started talking sassy to them as they were presenting the quantum fusion to OriGen and trying to negotiate a partnership. She was acting all high and mighty as if she doesn't need what they have. If someone is saying they have the invention that will replace the oil on planet earth and your rebottle is that you don't want to give up majority ownership in your current tech company because the price is unreasonable to go into a partnership then this negotiation loses all credibility.
9. In the pitch meeting for partnership they are being rebutted with questions like, "Does it really work? Where is it? Show us how it works again." It just didn't feel serious and it felt goofy. If you're going to go into business with someone and their idea doesn't work then it just doesn't work and your contract is voided. Why would they be attempting to go into a partnership with you if they have a product that doesn't work. Obviously, they are going to be exposed immediately if it doesn't actually work.
10. Edie's son was way over the top. Not only did he have Tourette's syndrome and a coke habit, but he was also spoiled and incompetent. It was just too much.
Again, I stopped watching in the middle of episode 4 so I have no idea what else happened. This went downhill in a hurry!
Meet Joe Black (1998)
A Masterpiece's Masterpiece
This movie is a masterpiece of the highest, highest order!
Acting: A+++++ Pitt & Hopkins, and LITERALLY every cast member is on another level! They all play off each other beautifully.
Story: A++++ Everything about the look into humanity, and people, and relationships, and legacy is simply perfect! PERFECT!!!
Pacing: A+++ Simple and yet, beautiful, and masterful. A slow, light beauty.
Characters: A++ You will not find it done better in any movie. This is how you write characters, even the supporting ones.
Score: A+++++ Sheesh, simple, subtle, and just INCREDIBLE.
Dialogue/Writing: A+++ This is how you write interactions and conversations. Everything stands alone, and at the same time, everything means so much more than what they're saying. Nothing is over the top, everything is believable, nothing is wasted.
Emily the Criminal (2022)
Not everything has a killer twist and that's ok.
What makes it believable is also what makes it unremarkable. You're waiting for something explosive, something that shocks and awes, but it never happens. It's a character study of sorts. It's a story about a regular man, a regular woman, and how life makes you feel like you're only option to get ahead is to draw outside the lines, so you do, and before you know it, you're okay operating all the way outside the lines for the right opportunity.
Rossi has been great since Sons of Anarchy and Aubrey is perfect with her awkward, offbeat brand of beauty and acting. It all feels like it could happen to you.
While the film does a great job immersing you into it's world, it suffers from the thing that makes it great, there's no twist, no final villain, no boss-level to get past at the end. The final act is great in its own right, but is underwhelming from the standpoint that as movie goers we're always looking for the "Sixth Sense" twist to make me leave the theater with my jaw on the ground. There's none of that.
In fact, the main actress' decision in the end is not even noble, it's self preservation and it's kinda scummy, but it's in line with what she has become by the end.
I enjoyed it.
Beast (2022)
Brought a Knife to a Lion Fight!
1. Idris sees his friend get chummy, up close and personal with a pride of lions -> IMMEDIATELY LEAVE because you have daughters and you're not risking a catastrophe. MOVIE OVER.
2. Idris sees a whole village mauled to death -> IMMEDIATELY LEAVE because you have daughters and you're not risking a catastrophe. MOVIE OVER.
3. Idris sees a bloody survivor on the way out -> PUT GUY IN CAR & IMMEDIATELY LEAVE because you have daughters and you're not risking a catastrophe. MOVIE OVER.
4. Idris' friend has lion bite and is about pass out -> SAY A PRAYER & IMMEDIATELY LEAVE because you have daughters and you're not risking a catastrophe. MOVIE OVER.
5. Stopping to sew everyone up.
6. Attending to daughters wounds instead of driving away IMMEDIATELY.
7. Attending to daughters wounds instead of securing the poacher's building IMMEDIATELY.
8. Going to fight a lion with a knife.
9. Surviving a fight with a lion for more than 3 seconds.
10. Getting 2 stabs in on the lion with a knife.
11. Lion shakes off the car drop off a cliff.
12. Lion shakes off being lit on fire.
13. Lion shakes off group of poachers firing at him with semi-automatic and automatic rifles.
14. Lion finds them after they drive away in a vehicle for presumably miles.
15. Vehicle low on gas, so let's stop.
16. Girls do whatever they want. Defiant. Unbothered. But then scared at times.
17. Girl stabs the lion with a tranquilizer.
18. Kicking the lion in the face works repeatedly.
19. Lions baiting traps.
20. Lions avenging their pride.
21. Lions murdering people.
22. I could keep going, but why?
The Boys (2019)
Shock and Awe, but with a Purpose
Yes, the show is gross, gore-filled and utterly shocking at times with how far it pushes the envelope...HOWEVER, if you can stomach the over the top blood, guts and sexual deviancy (Not much nudity, but deviant sexual situations), then you'll find exactly what mature, thinking consumers are looking for:
- Crafted, complex characters you can invest in.
- Calculated, humanistic villains with real motivations.
- Situations that have actual stakes and consequences.
- Imperfect protagonists and sympathetic antagonists.
- Thought-out stories with payoffs and growth.
- Themes that are deeper than "take over the world."
- Problems that aren't resolved in 30min.
- Issues where both sides have plausible pros and cons.
- Political ideas that are explored, but not forced down your throat, as well as having the opposing thought represented unbiased.
- Good film direction.
- Season 1: 7/10 - It's slow and is setting things up. Solid.
- Season 2: 7.5/10 - Strong themes and characters. Great writing.
- Season 3: 9/10 - Takes the gloves off. Exceptional character arcs. Well crafted writing. Shocks, awes, and leaves speechless at times. Finds it's niche somewhere between thought provoking and TMI.
Altered Carbon (2018)
Season 2 real deaths one of the best SciFi storylines
Season 1: Brilliant. Incredible Ideas. Well executed plots. Excellent world building. Multifaceted villains. Superb pacing and slow-burn storytelling. Nice twists you didn't see coming.
Season 2: (4 episodes in) Why change the pacing and dark settings? What happened to the goth, neo-noir, punk, psychedelic feel? The storyline ideas now remind me of the CW shows!
Nobody is calculated or cunning. Bad guys are doing evil monologues with one dimensional motivations. Recycling endearing characters without doing them justice. The Last Envoy keeps getting owned by everyone. Weird Quell Falconer storyline feels like a shallow payoff after her character was so iconically built up in season 1. It's Quell but not Quell. Smh.
Storytelling has dropped to bargain basement. Characters are HORRIBLE!!!! Tak, the bounty hunter mom, Jaeger, Governor Harlan, the Dig AI, Tanaseda, literally EVERY CHARACTER is HORRIBLE!!!! Nobody thinks. Everyone rushes into danger. Standoffs with guns but no one ever shoots. Poe is great, but he is "broken" now so he's not helpful and he no longer has chemistry with Tak. Smh.
I'm beyond disappointed. I'm gonna tap out.
Reacher (2022)
Thank God they didn't mess this up like Jack Ryan.
- Over the top? Yes. But still believable.
- Very good casting!
- Good enough acting.
- Storyline is dramatic, but not fantasy.
- Reacher character isn't forced. Thank God.
- Supporting characters are decently written.
- Antagonist could've been better, but at least it wasn't cartoonish.
- Flashbacks to his childhood were well done.
- No political agendas.
- Female leads were strong and tough, but still feminine and not over the top.
- Finlay was a great co-star, basically the opposite of Reacher.
- I wish he would've been with Neagley instead of Roscoe, but that's my personal preference, lol.
Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)
No Way Nostalgia Alone can Save this! Nostalgia A+ Overall B-/C+
My thoughts in chronological order as I watched it:
The beginning is very cheesy. Tons of manufactured tension and corny humor. This is why I'm not a huge fan of Homecoming and Far from Home.
Off the rip...WHERE IS EVERYONE? Where is S. H. I. E. L. D.? Spider-Man knows tons of heroes with tons of access to technology and means which can solve this movie's issues rather quickly, but whatever...
Ned: C- (his character is just nonsensical)
MJ: C+ (their chemistry and relationship is so forced)
Why did everyone just believe the reporting when it was leaked that Peter was Spider-Man? How come he just didn't deny it. Where is S. H. I. E. L. D.?
Dare Devil cameo: C- (It wasn't really that cool, but ok)
THIS IS CRITICAL: The reason for the spell to be cast was super cheesy! Because they didn't get into MIT and now they're all famous, which is making their life hard, sigh. I expect this from a 17yo kid, but Dr. Strange actually does this for him? Sigh...
Why does he need money and why is he having trouble getting into college? He's Spider-Man! He knows some of the most powerful, famous, well-connected people on the planet! He shouldn't be lacking money or have trouble getting into ANY college if he wants! Or any place, or institution in general! Sigh... Where is S. H. I. E. L. D.?
The reason the spell got messed up is cheesy, he basically wouldn't stop talking and Dr. Strange made a mistake. Sigh...
Dr. Strange messed up the spell, really? Really? Sigh...
Dr. Strange: Solid B (I love Benedict Cumberbatch, it's not his fault, they watered him down from his usual serious, all business character to a cheesy guy who argues with teenagers. Sigh...)
Why does Strange agree to do the spell so easily? Why does Wong agree? Sigh...
Why wouldn't Peter know the multiverse is real? He was acting like he didn't live through the snap and then come back and help with everything in Infinity Wars. Sigh...
Why does Spider-Man have to go "find" all the villains that entered our verse from the spell? Why wouldn't Strange be able to know exactly where every person is that didn't belong?
Why does he leave Spider-Man to find them and not help? Where is S. H. I. E. L. D.?
He doesn't want to tell Wong because he'll be "upset" even though there are verse shattering stakes? Sigh...
Where are the Avengers? Fury? Anyone? Where is S. H. I. E. L. D.?
Why is only MJ and Ned helping? Why not anyone else? ANYONE! Where is S. H. I. E. L. D.?
Why did Jamie Foxx/Electro not look like he did in the original movie? Why is he not nerdy anymore? He got a makeover and a completely different personality? Sigh...
How did Aunt May want Peter to help Osborn when Osborn first wandered in? What could he have done? Just zap him and let's go! Why does she want Peter to "make a difference" by trying to change the villains fate? Did they not see what tampering with verses does from the Infinity Wars?
Why does Aunt May want to be involved so much all of a sudden?
Why would Peter want to reverse the villains' deaths? Why does he want to change their fate? What's his motivation? Why does he care? What does he think he can do? Why does he go from respecting and revering Strange to challenging his orders so quickly?
Why did he stop Strange from reversing the spell when they initially caught all the villains? What did he really think he could do? Does he think he understood more about the multiverse than Strange? Sigh...
How come he could still use his body when Strange pushed his spirit from his physical body? How come Peter just "knew" everything about mysticism and the mirror dimension that it took Strange his whole movie to learn?
Parker beat Strange???? I think I'm all set...
Parker beat Strange while they were IN the mirror dimension???? I'm definitely all set...
How does Wong not sense all this is happening?
Stark fabricator device that just macguffins out cures like pastries??? Nothing is explained? Sigh...
Why did Happy have this sitting around at his apartment like it was a blender or something?
What is Jonah Jameson's motivation? He's always around. ALWAYS!
How come the Green Goblin can go toe-to-toe with Spider-Man without his gadgets or glider? I mean I know he also has super strength, but with all the stuff Spider-Man has done, seen, and battled in this version of him, GG without his toys just seems low level. Sigh...
The Green Goblin spoiling everything and tricking everyone at the condo when they were coming up with the cures feels super manufactured. Sigh...
Aunt May's death was an EXCELLENT scene, REALLY good! A+ BUT IT DID NOT NEED TO HAPPEN. Why was she trying so hard to help Peter fight super beings?
How come Ned could do the spells?????? Just because he had on Strange's ring? I'm all set... Sigh...
The 3 Spider-Men together on screen was simply AMAZING AND MAGNIFICENT: A+++++
They're just coming up with cures and stuff on the fly???? They all worked perfectly? Sigh...
What's Sandman's motivation? Wouldn't he want to go home to his verse to see his daughter ASAP?
What's The Lizard/Doctor Connors' motivation? He's just hanging out enjoying the chaos? Sigh...
Doc Ock helping at the end was BEAUTIFUL! A+
The way MJ and Ned accidentally brought Strange back from the mirror dimension was never explained and was sudden and stupid.
Wouldn't the villains not dying mess with other stuff in their respective dimensions/verses? What happened to ripple effects and such?
Strange comes back from the mirror dimension for the final fight scene and has a hard time with Green Goblin? GG gets the drop on him and destroys the box? Why? Why does Strange suck in this movie?
Andrew Garfield's Spider-Man saving MJ as a redemption for his own MJ dying was SUPERB! A+
So, all this happened because of Peter messing up the spell? Because he didn't get into MIT? Sigh...
Strange doesn't seem to have many answers. He's way toned down.
MJ is taller than Peter and she's slightly annoying.
Where were all the news crews, helicopters, police and EVERYONE during the Statue of Liberty battle? Where is S. H. I. E. L. D.?
The final spell feels weird, shouldn't there be more fall out if everyone forgets Peter existed?
As a movie, this does nothing to further the Marvel Universe's story or give us hope that Marvel will put out good stuff. This was an awesome trip down Nostalgia lane, but it was not a good movie. It was hollow.
Zero storyline. Zero explanations. Manufactured tension. Macguffins galore!
This was a treat, but it was not a good movie. Sigh...
Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol (2011)
Even my wife could see through the awful writing...
I never write reviews, but I had to with this one. This movie was a joke on so many levels. If you have a brain and actually want to know why things are happening and what's going on, please don't watch this. The writers of this movie should have their Screen Writers Guild Memberships revoked permanently.
First I'll start with the Pros: 1.Cinematography and Screenplay: Breathtaking and beautifully done. 2.Nope, that's it! Only one pro!
Now the Cons: 1.Cruise: Was his old self, good as usual but not great. His role was bad because the writing was elementary at best. He was the old Ethan Hunt minus being intelligent, smart, quick on his feet, calculated
etc. He just hit people and jumped off stuff. 2.Female Agent: Horrible casting. She doesn't work, she's not believable. 3.Tech Specialist Agent: Was apparently supposed to be comic relief. He was a joke. 4.Ving Rhames: Not in the movie except for an ending cameo! Unforgivable! 5.Analyst/Other Male Agent: Good actor, bad writing. The story of why he was no longer in the field was weak! You failed a mission and a woman you don't know died so you quit the field? Weak writing! 6.Russian Cops: Ethan evades them like 5 times. Really? Weak writing! 7.Plot: Never developed. We never know who the crazy guy that wants to blow up the World really is, why he wants to do it, and why does he want to make it look like the IMF team was behind it. He wants to start a nuclear war to "start the World over". Really? Very weak writing! And why the age old Soviet vs. USA plot? 8.Disavowed IMF team: So we fire all our intelligence, counter- intelligence, espionage and special ops people because a building blew up? We've done a lot worst for a lot less and given people medals for it! Weak writing! 9.Prison Escape: It was too easy and elementary. Especially since we later learn that Ethan didn't know they were coming for him. It looked rehearsed; he knew how to perfectly get through every door. How did he know to wait in that room when the ground opened up? 10.Kremlin: His disguise as the general was weak. The gadget to render the hallway image was cool. He got in and out the Kremlin WAY too easy! Then they blew it up! Come on! Is it that easy to blow up government maximally secured buildings these days? 11.Burj Khalifa Scene: No comment. Just No Comment. 12.Billionaire: Coughs up the codes pretty easy huh? Not to mention he's comical and unrealistic. The female agent is pathetic in this scene as well. She's supposed to be seducing him, but she doesn't, but he's still interested. He's a billionaire at his own party with a whole bunch of rich people and can have any chick he wants, but this bumbling woman catches his eyes? Right! 13.Escaping Death: Ethan AKA Evel Knievel escapes death dozens of times. I mean Mission Impossible, yes, but this stuff was literally unrealistic. Freestyle climbing a skyscraper! Escaping maximum security prison! Surviving a sandstorm! Falling to a steep hundred foot crash head on in a vehicle! All kinds of other jumps! All pretty much unscathed! Give me a break. Did I mention the female agent takes a bullet dead on, but is strong enough to fight on for another 20 min! What! 14.Fight Choreography: A joke! Ethan beats on 2 dozen hardened inmates during his escape, but gets smacked around by a senior citizen with a briefcase in the final fight scene? Why did he have such a hard time getting that briefcase from the guy that looked 20 years older than him! Why did the other male agent have such a hard time with the guy in the electrical room when the tech specialist agent had to come in and shoot him. And the cherry, the chick fight was horrible. It's supposed to be super agent vs. super assassin, but the assassin gets handled pretty swiftly? That sucked! 15.The Launch Code Exchange: The tech specialist agent pulls the old fake arm trick? Really? Really? She conveniently finds the contact lens camera? Really? Horrible writing! 16.Sandstorm: What? First of all, why? What are the odds of this happening precisely when this mission is happening? Then, he runs, fights, and tactically pursues in at 120 miles an hour? What? He just happens to have the goggles? What? The dude gets away? What? 17.The Nuke: This was the most unrealistic of them all. First, you can't just buy warheads, buy launch codes and buy a satellite and poof! It doesn't work that way. If a missile is even aimed at a country, every government in the entire world knows it, it's called counter intelligence and satellites of our own! Even pointing a warhead, much less initializing or launching one is an act of war. This would have never even gotten this far, it's called the Cold War. You're telling me they pointed, initialized, launched and stopped a warhead inches from detonating in a major US city? In reality, it would have never reached the Western hemisphere before being shot down by counter missiles. Who wrote this?
Horrible movie. Just bad.