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Reviews
Loot (2022)
SNL...
Unpopular opinion... SNL ruins actors she is terrible in everything Similar to other female SNL cast and many male casts (albeit fewer seemed cursed) every scene theyre in just feels like a painfully long SNL skit. Its like they just reenact their characters from their popular snl skits. Kristen wigg in Palm Royale fell into it as did both of them in Bridesmaids. They slip in and out of their jokey variety show schtick. Its a distracting and just all around bad. A few people transitioned - Jane Curtain is one. Bill murray. Eddie murphy. Julia Louis Dreyfus dare I say Adam Sandler. Maybe its people who only stayed a short time? Anyway. Thats mostly what i see when i watch Loot. SNL skits that are too long with "Guest" stars.
Lessons in Chemistry (2023)
Major Spoilers - 2 episodes
Sorry major spoilers right ouuta the gate. I didn't read the read the book so just going off the show.... 1. Aren't golden labradoodles a designer dog from the 1990s?? What is one doing in the a show set in the 50?? 2. really - asshole dog is the reason for the love interests death and no ones gonna say anything?? Based on what I've read the dog is in the rest of the show so she didnt get rid of him... Why change Calvins death from a "slip" in the book (according to synopsis) to making it the dogs fault? Now I hate the dog and have no desire to see him in the rest of the show. That god they took out the "narration, talking part - (again, so I've read). I was enjoying the show till the ahole dog caused the death. But it was clear something would happen as Calvin was clearly "too happy".
Wednesday (2022)
TBD as i watch more...
Im 10 mins in and already turned off. Sorry CZJ as morticia is fine but LG as gomez is terrible. I get Gomez is not ur traditional, classic handsome man but there is supposed to be something abt him - a je ne sais quoi... eg tim curry - in anything. And I get this is for kids But to be blunt - LG is really really really unattractive. Theres no chemistry whatsoever. Not anything that makes u go.. ok not me cupnif tea but i get it. Its just plain awkward, hard to watch. And its like they do angles to make him even more unattractive. And to pair w CZJ is just distracting. And yes i know there supposed to be opposites - tall/short, pretty/ not handsome etc. But this is just uncomfortable. Ok. Thats the 1st 10 mins. Well see how the rest goes.
I Believe in Santa (2022)
Elf .... kinda
WOW. This is really bad. Like poor mans Hallmark movie x 10 bad without the over the top , magical sap that makes hallmarks movies fun. So just comes across as creepy man. Comparing being ostracized for believing in santa to being muslim.
It like they tried to find a really cheap + creepy Will ferrel / Elf character who also comes across as a gay man playing it straight and just a grown ass man that thinks xmas is real. A grinch woman with a child but hates xmas - sad for the kid.
Really AWFUL acting plus terrible prod design. The xmas trees look dead. The flocking sad. Green wire lights against the white flocking and creepy xmas decorations .. all terrible
Couldn't finish. Went to sleep.
Pig (2021)
FINALLY an Oscar worthy film.
Sorry to be so aggressive but People complaining about it being boring or terrible Are just plain ignorant and or have zero emotional intelligence. Going fwd i will actually use this film as a gage to judge people people. Your review of this film will speak volumes about you!
To everyone saying - Nic Cage is back. I say "not that we went anywhere" Lol (if u know u know).
Instead of watching the story unfold and accepting it for what it was I think some pol went into it with assumptions and got angry it didn't meet those immature expectations. At no point did I think this would be a "cage rage" revenge film. I have zero understanding as to why anyone with a heart and a brain would think that. Nothing about the marketing, the trailer, the cover gives that impression.
I know a chef like Robin and they are a rare breed. If you cant comprehend food cooked from the heart with passion and love I guess you can't even begin to appreciate the nuanced beauty of that world that are shown in this film or even understand certain aspects of this film.
If you've never had a truly heartbreaking soul crushing loss that destroyed ur world I guess you can't even begin to understand or appreciate the other aspects of this film. Maybe having been a part of this world of passion for ingredients and cooking makes me biased.
Aside from being a beautiful story that's beautifully shot with beautiful acting - The screen writers did an amazing job of capturing the intimate relationship between a chef and the food they cooks, the ingredients they use, and the people they cook for.
No, not every chef has that intuition or passion or connection but when they do it is a truly beautiful experience to be on the receiving end of.
And all of that is just the setting or metaphor for a poignant story about love and loss and difficulty dealing with it.
I know I use beautiful a lot in this review but this film is perhaps one of the few films most deserving of its use. If youre looking for cage rage revenge summer blockbuster movie (not a film) PLEASE go see something else. Don't tarnish it for others.
This is one of very few films I've ever seen that i had zero - i wish they had done xyz instead - moments. And one of the few I can say with certainty deserves multiple oscars for acting, direction, and screenplay. I appreciate Tarantino but Once upon a time in Hollywood was GOD. AWFUL. If that self indulgent, piece of crap can win oscars and PIG / Cage dont.... then oscars have lost any and all meaning /value.
Gone in the Night (2022)
DONT DO IT!!
I was intrigued by the trailer. But man oh man was this awful. Within 30 minutes you knew the supposed, painfully obvious "twist". Mis matched characters with awkward conversations. No depth or explanation As to why the characters are the way they are. Had WR actually been serious at the end and just not trying to fake them out THAT might've been an interesting plot twist. She and DM kinda made a nice couple.
Not sure if that's what the ending was attempting to imply? That maybe she was going to either stick around and live there and just leave the others to die in the shipping container? Or maybe she was contemplating using the treatment. Way too ambiguous of an ending and not in a good way.
If it's free go ahead and waste 90 mins watching it. But no way is it worth the 7$
Flowers in the Attic: The Origin (2022)
MUCH BETTER THAN THE FITA series
Read the FITA series and all the VC Andrews stories growing up. Loved them! Was soooo disappointed with the FITA heather gram series. HG IS AWFUL. The actor who played Kathy AWFUL. But the origin story series was actually surprisingly good!! Acting so much better. And did a great job showing how grandmother's disturbing behavior came to be.
Please have THIS cast remake the FITA series so there is continuity with the set/house and characters.
Senior Year (2022)
WTF did I just watch
It took 4 tries to get thru it. What a GOD AWFUL piece of "marmite". Terrible story. Terrible acting by Rebel Wilson - she is just NOT funny. Was this just a vehicle to show off a new figure? The body suit prom dress, the dance? SO SO SO BAD. Like it makes me angry how bad it is. I can't find one redeeming thing about it. Never been a fan of Rebel's but she at least had MAYBE a few funny lines in Pitch Perfect 1. This had nothing from her or anyone, but at least they weren't painful to watch. She is not a leading lady or even a co-lead (terrible in Hustle). How this gets green lit is beyond me.
Yellowstone (2018)
Most unlikeable character....
Just like Pretty cinematography doesnt equal a good story being a child doesnt equal a likable character. I dont know if its just bad acting or bad writing but man Kacey + Monica's son is perhaps THE most annoying in TV history. Not cute. Not funny. Not watchable. Bad enough to make me skip their scenes. The Monica character is pretty annoying too so maybe the child is supposed to reflect that.
The show is okay. Definitely starts to feel a bit too soap opera / overly dramatic.
Other annoying characters -
Mom monica
Mom (johns wife)
Brother Jaime.
The Shrink Next Door (2021)
Oy!
I can't get past the terrible attempts at a Jewish accent and Jewish culture. Is there even one Jewish person in the cast or on this project? It's so bad it's borderline offensive.
The Morning Show (2019)
Jennifer Aniston brings it down
The show is great but episodes that Aniston is featured in brings it down. Her character is so unlikable and too much of a whiny self-absorbed entitled. Yes that's her character but it's also the way JA plays it. She's just a terrible actor unfortunately. Her crying scenes are painful to watch because they're like watching someone pretending to cry, pretending to act sad. It's just not authentic at all. Reese W. Is borderline, a little better than JA. Sadly they just killed off one of the best and most interesting/ complex characters and best actors - Steve Carrell. Its astounding that JA gets the kudos she does. She really is just a terrible actor.
Season 3 -
Billy crudup / Cory - continues to be the best part of the show - fantastic.
The story is more engaging interesting. But the acting from Aniston is terrible and Reese's acting gets worse too. Both have this awful duck face fake cry that is so distractingly awful. Anistons acting waas briefly better but by end of season it was painfully bad - probably cause she had to show more emotion. Which she and Reese suck at.
Production wise - please fire the continuity person. In addition to the many plot holes and story lines they expect you to somehow know (Reed on the golf course? Sloan? Skipping whole pandemic? Flash backs that dont add up) the continuity is so sloppy. Its day its night its same night but the outfits are different.
When cory meets paul marks in the hotel he walk IN carrying a folder which he places on the table. When he leaves he hands the folder to the hotel person like it's a menu. I kept waiting for there to be some secret document hand off plot twister... but nope. I rewatched multiple times to see what I missed... nothing.
Also they incorrectly make claims to stuff that happened - you go back and watch and it didnt happen - Reeses claim Paul knew exactly what laura said to her - that he quoted her... No he didnt. Her paranoia came outta nowhere and made no sense. I had to go back and rewatch.
This goes to the bad acting but the only relationship that shows any ,ind of emotion of feeling like it might be real human emotion is Cory towards Reeses and occasionally Reese toward Cory. Laura and Reese are terrible - zero chemistry or rhyme or reason. It's like they just decide okay - now you two date.
The whole eavesdropping / spying / blackmail of a huge company and employees.... they're gonna just IGNORE... THAT'S how they start "CLEAN" and "better"?? Eye roll.
Whatever happened in the hospital with cory and reese when they go looking for her brother? They keept flashing back to her washing her hands but never reference what it is. And the whole Chip and Aniston unrequited love... that just comes outta no where. No signs of it - just suddenly theres jealousy in season 2.
For the budget they have the writing, story lines, acting, continuity should be tighter. They cant get rid of Aniston at this point I assume Reese will come back. And hopefully the saving grace of cory.
It's entertaining to watch and see what happens but aside from Cory its not award winning show.
This Is Your Death (2017)
WTF did I just watch
As they used to say way back when - complete waste of film. Terrible premise. God awful acting (except for Gian Carlos). No story development. No depth so feel nothing for any of the characters. Plot holes as far as the eye can see. Why? How does crap like this get made?
Truth Be Told (2019)
Good production value....bad execution
I dont know if it's bad writing or bad acting or a combination of the 2. Poppy/Octavia is terrible. Her character is annoyingly indignant + defensive, jumps to absurd conclusions, and is generally not a likable character. In what world are civilians allowed to interfere in police investigations to the degree she does.
How many times can character Markus say "I'm former OPD". That is his response to everything in season 1 + 2!
I'm embarrassed for some of the actors and the scenes. The sister showing up on her motorcycle to yell at Micah/Kate Hudson 🙄. Kate's reaction. Poppy in most scenes. Markus in most scenes. Aaron was great in season 1 but it just made poppy/ocativa look that much worse.
The stories have the potential to be interesting but they're just so annoyingly portrayed. Pretty sure I've already figured out what happens in season 2.
Afternoon Delight (2013)
Whats the point ? Spoilers
Spoilers....
Watching Ted Lasso made me look for other films the characters have been in.
Soo in a misplaced effort to help someone she thinks is worse off than her, a bored house wife injects herself into a dancer/sex workers life and ruins her sobriety.
With the exception of Josh R I'm a fan of the cast but the story was lacking. When i saw there was only 30 mins left i was disappointed they weren't going to actaully address any of the real issues they had lightly touched on.
So 55 days of sobriety ruined. One marriage ruined. And is she never gonna tell her husband she watched/participated? Seems like a time bomb waiting to off later.
This movie just makes upper class suburban white moms look self absorbed and pathetic. I don't mind a character that has flaws but this just showed you the flaws and destruction with no redemption for those harmed.
Schmigadoon! (2021)
How the reviews so good??
This was painful. I dont mind musicals but this was just annoying. Thankfully i was able to fast fwd thru the song+dance numbers. I may be in the minority here but i feel like people from SNL are terrible actors. They may be ok in the skits but they rarely transition well into anything else (yes of course there are a few exceptions, sorry kristen wigg not being one of them). SNL is rarely funny these days and Lorne Michaels forays into tv/film rarely are either. 2 stars for the possibility of Keegan being funny.
Malcolm & Marie (2021)
TLDR
Self indulgent. Too long. Pretentious. I dont get all the fuss about zendaya. Shes ok in this I guess but i don't get all the excitement about her abilities. Maybe im too old to appreciate her. She still comes across as a 15 year old tying to act adult.
And then theres flashes of her same personality i see in interviews trying to act tough and be cool. Didnt mind her in something like Spiderman and i havent seen her in euphoria but i believe she plays a teen so maybe it works.
This was a painful 1:45.
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood (2002)
Rewatched. Spoilers
Spoiler alert.
I just re-watched this and I'm wondering if I missed something? Was the big "secret" that mama had a breakdown and beat the kids that one time ? Is that supposed to be the big "trauma"? Yes it's terrible but some kids got that on a regular basis not just one time. Then mama goes away and comes back and it's all sunny again? Then what's soda holding a grudge for? Is there more to it in the book?