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kier_finnegan
Reviews
Strange Magic (2015)
An AI generated film trained on A-Level scripts and fairy fan art
Imagine a film created solely by AI that was trained on scripts written by A-Level students and an image dump from DeviantArt with the keywords "fairy fan art+1990s". Imagine song choices gathered using the ChatGPT prompt "please give me a list of the most tedious love songs of all time". Imagine sourcing a decent cast and for some reason directing them to perform these tedious songs in the most obnoxious way possible.
It really takes a lot for me to hate a film but there is nothing redeemable about it and it makes me furious. It's insufferable. It looks absolutely dreadful. It has no depth. They try and throw in a few jokes for the parents but this only serves to make the viewer feel like they've watched someone humiliate themselves in public. You experience the 5 stages of grief with each musical number. And it's inexplicably, painfully, long. My 5 year old daughter really likes it for some reason and it's the 3rd time she's watched it. Please send help.
Suspect (2022)
TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED! Ok. Since you shouted...
Why did I watch this? Channel 4 and great cast. James Nesbitt has been in some good dramas of late. But. This show involves James Nesbitt meeting a different person each episode, shouting at them, and them giving him some information. That is literally it. The viewer sits passively while they are told or shown "some stuff". Do we care that his daughter died? No. We do not see her or them together at any point. Do we care how her mum feels? No she's in it for 10 minutes. Is there any suspense? No we're just told things in sequence. THERE ARE NO CHARACTERS, JUST PEOPLE SAYING THINGS. THERE ARE NO RELATIONSHIPS. THERE IS NO POINT. It's also hilariously bad at times. The fight scene in the gym had me cracking up.
Have you ever listened to a child tell a story? "And then, and then..." It's that.
Two stars for Nesbitt's eyebrows, the most interesting and compelling thing about this series.