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Reviews
The Thin Red Line (1998)
Terrible
One of the worst war movies ever made. Terence Malice proves he knows as much about war as he did bout the Old West in "Days of Heaven". It is an insult to the fine Marines who died taking this important objective. Penn and Nolte are much too old for their roles. The script is not realistic. See the 1994 version. It is much, much better. Actually they are almost all too old as the real Marines would have been 18-22. I don't need 600 characters to review this ridiculous movie. I hope Malik never makes another one. Now they say I need to write eighty-two more characters now it's down to twenty-six.
The Last Kingdom (2015)
Needs a Narrator
The books are told in the first-person narrative by an old man. Putting the story in memory explains his youthful mistakes. But the first episode should have been devoted to uhtred's formative years. His relationship to Ragnar is essential to the story arc. Sam Eliot, Chris Kristofferson, et Al. Narrating his youth Could bring a cohesion not readily assumed by this show. Keep everything the same but explain it. But you have to include the arm rings.
The Sign of Four: Sherlock Holmes' Greatest Case (1932)
Doyle Mutt be Spinning.
Only the title is Holmes-related. The rest is pure bunkum. Interesting to note that Holmes here wears the hat Basil Rathbone wears in his series made much later. Dr. Watson as a love interest so the film ends on a kiss?! Nighttime speedboat race?! Tongan blow gunner played by An African?! No LeStrade?! The print quality is dreadful. Maybe my four start rating is inflationary.
Inventing Anna (2022)
Fascinating Story
Well written, well acted. "Anna" gives an award worthy performance. It's well worth watching. Maybe is should have been called The Gullibles, about the willing to believe a confidence artist. I'm glad to have seen it.
The French Dispatch of the Liberty, Kansas Evening Sun (2021)
Wes Anderson. . .
. . . Never fails to fail. Great ideas. Beautiful framing. No coherent story. Nonetheless, there are great vignettes that make this worthwhile watching. Performances by great actors hamming it up. No doubt a film school must-see. For visuals!; not story. There is no one to root for here. Enjoy its limitations.
Forooshande (2016)
Insightful
I love these glimpses into foreign cultures. I expected the Purity and Virtue police to arrest her for being raped. Not having eight male witnesses to verify her story, she would be branded an adulteress. Which perhaps why he did not go to any police. Well acted, filmed and directed.
Equals (2015)
A for Effort, D for credibility
Any totally controlled society would have picked up their conversations, noticed their closeness and separated them. No economy can survive universal sameness. Universal lack of entertainment.
The Eyes of Tammy Faye (2021)
Not a born fraud.
A very dear friend was once duped of everything she'd earned by the man who paid her. Tammy Faye was a sincere "Christian" who had a performance talent. Jim Bakker had charisma, Andrew Garfield does not. It is not a tragedy. It starts on the makeup but never really evolves her look. Certainly not her tattooed eyes and lips. I didn't root for her because merry unquestioning nature does not match her intelligence. But who doesn't want a gospel of .prosperity and the rewards that accompany it? Chastain is fabulous.
Phantom from Space (1953)
'50's SciFi Camp
This is so low budget a flick that you have to admire it. Seventy years later, it is a hoot. One actor, the major, had a twenty-year career as character actor. One guy looks and sounds like Rod Serling. It's competent hokum in that both the basic premise that anyone from "the outer limits" (Yes, that's right from the script) is a killer monster, and the failure of any government entity moving in to take over. Not to be taken seriously on any level. Endure it so you can say you saw it through.
The Green Knight (2021)
Dreadful
The opening titles are illegible for a reason. No one wants to be associated with this mess. Medieval scholars would probably burn any theater that showed it. Casting Dev Patel as a "knight" of King Arthur's makes as much sense as him playing David Copperfield. Oh wait. That was another miscasting. I like Dev Patel in general. He's a perfectly adequate actor.
The plots is indiscernible. Cinematography is excellent and wasted on this drivel. I write this twenty minutes into it. If I watch it all the way through, I will probably drop my raring further. You have been warned.
Around the World in 80 Days (2021)
So Disappointing
Made it halfway through the first episode and gave up in disgust. They've changed the story and the characters! Tennet is unlikeable. So you don't care if he makes it. The policeman has been change to a female reporter, from a challenge to an annoyance. No chase. No giveadamn about anyone. No even the old valet he leaves behind. See the star-studded Mike Todd production. One hundred times better.
The Wheel of Time (2021)
The Folk Musick Isn't
Many English and French folk tunes have survived the Medieval period. They are lively, danceable music. Some mournful. But instruments of the period could not hold notes. So minuets, gavottes, and other Terpsichoreean dance require lively.
Cusp (2021)
No One to Like
You really don't care what happens to these girls who have no respect for themselves and no hope for a better life. The result is depressing without being interesting. A documentary about anthills would be more involving.
Der schweigende Stern (1960)
Ten for execution, Zero for science
The surface of Venus is four times the boiling point. Gravity is 90% of Earth's. Same plot, same cast, same SFX on Mars and I'd give it an eight. English version dubbing is excellent. Listing the pretty Japanese doctor as the lead star is odd. Dialog is shared among the actors. No one is really the hero. I've seen it twice now. A few years apart. Liked it better the second viewing. But my science part of science fiction rebels at giving it a higher rating.
But, heck,I'm 80. Great flick for third-graders.
Six Minutes to Midnight (2020)
Beyond Stupid
The plot is ridiculous. The acting stiff. A waste of some talent. Izzard a little and Dench and broadbent a lot. I guess WWII spy plots have died an ungainly death. Where is Len Deighton when we really need him?
Invisible Ghost (1941)
One of the Worst Ever
This movie makes Ed Wood look like a genius. Those onLy remotely interesting thing is the lighting from below stag left in certain scenes. The script is nonsense. The acting stiff. Lugosi must have been desperate. He certainly was when Ed Wood cast him. It's not even bad enough to be campy.
Voyagers (2021)
Kids in Spaaaace!
No one in his/her right mind would send all these immature children on an exploratory mission without adequate adult supervision. No adult supervisor would take a delinquent boy on am space walk. This mission would have to have military order and discipline. Avoid watching to keep your faith in mankind's futurre intact.
Nordwand (2008)
Needs a Better Director.
They are too old to be Privates. She should be a pretty love interest. Everything is shot the same. You could make this dramatic by telling it for someone's perspective. Instead any tension is wasted on a you-are-there equal camerawork. The Nazis must have been huge supporters. A race to the top is not announced. No newsreel cameras. Est ist sinloss, wirklich.
Perfect Sense (2011)
Prescient
In 2021, this is a documentary. Symptoms mimic COVID-19. Restaurant stress already experienced. It's a tad frightening when SciFi is history.
They Came from Beyond Space (1967)
Remarkable Filmmaking
The cinematography is awesome. The jazz score amazing. Well ahead of its time. Corny as heck. But less dated than any SciFi flick of its age. The Brits should be proud of this effort.
L.A. Story (1991)
A Little Gem
This a delightful light comedy. The talking road sign is a great device. Steve Martin is perfect. Enjoy!
The Vampire Bat (1933)
Great Lighting.
The story is terrible. The acting wooden. The fine cast wasted. But the art direction is tres moderne. Especially atmospheric. You'd never guess Melvyn Douglas would go one to win two Oscars. You could waste an hour is worse ways. Enjoy it for what it is. Classically dreadful. Good film school material. Don't make these mistakes. It's most assuredly a B- movie. Enjoy!
The Living Ghost (1942)
A '40s Romp
This is one of those B movies that makes you stay in the theater, it's got everything including a one-hour runtime. You'll never guess WhoDunIt. Better hours of your time are hard to find.
A Call to Spy (2019)
An Insult . . .
. . . To the brave agents of the SOE and good filmmaking. Spies live under constant tension. The suspense level is deadening. You really don't care for the characters. The story of these courageous female agents deserves far better.
Wild Mountain Thyme (2020)
Perfectly Dreary
Irish accents might have turned this mediocre movie into something slightly charming. But with a mostly American cast and no budget for a dialogue coach, it falls flat at every turn. "Will ye go, lassie, go" is a grand song that dies on Emily Blount's lips. Even Christopher Walken can't help. He left his quirkiness in the States. Save your eyes for something even slightly better.