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Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008)
thank heaven they finished
The clone wars is one of my favorite things that has ever come about from star wars being brought back, and I was originally devastated when it had no conclusion. Finishing it made this series stand exactly where it deserves - in the upper echelon of the star wars universe.
Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
Story problem
The CGI = phenomenal. The acting = top notch. The world they are inhabiting = completely epic. The story = garbage. I understand the emperor was brought back in the comics, but this half-hearted attempt to mesh profit and shoving fandom into one film was a complete failure from a story standpoint. The emperor is a completely unnecessary villain, and how he has his body makes no sense, and Finn's character is wasted as is Rose's (she's basically not even in it), and the relationship between Rey and Ben is a problem to say the least, and I don't want to imagine that the emperor got it on at any point and had kids plz and thank you... Also Rey killing the emperor after he told her to and then it actually being good is like what just happened? And they can only come up with a fleet of death stars as easy to destroy as the original, which they made Rogue One to explain why it was, and everyone in the galaxy coming in to join a basically impossible fight after no one did in the last film against a far more beatable enemy, just like - what? There was no effort put into this, and to top it off, the supposed LGBTQIA+ scene they were talking up isn't even noticeable - I've watched the movie twice, known it would be there both times, and still haven't seen it. Thanks Disney for this - and oh yeah, Anakin is totally pathetic I guess for not just knowing you can kiss someone to save their life. Ugh.
Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)
could've been worse
I was not expecting Ehrenreich to be Ford, which I think helped in viewing this film. He wasn't like bad at imitating in some respects, but I don't think he had to be Ford. The approach he took was more intelligent, and it added a different spin on a classic character. The other performances were all very enjoyable to watch too, although the end didn't really do it for me. Like, the very end. In really any way. I know you have to get to a point where Solo will be on his own cuz he ends up with Leia (until he doesn't?), but still, I think canonizing Maul's return in film and having Clarke's character be trapped was a little lame. Not everyone needs to be brought back to life. Some people can stay dead, and if fans and writers want to imagine them still alive in comics and books, go ahead, but can't movies have any aspect of reality anymore? The end is what keeps my rating from being higher.
Rogue One (2016)
pleasantly surprised
The film starts slow and didn't really have me into it, but once all the different characters start getting introduced, actual life starts to form in this film. By the end, it has some real heart and a spectacular climax on par with some of the best Star Wars films out there. It is a genuinely great twist thrown in there, and I did not see it coming at all. I also had no awareness of what the movie was about going into it, which may have helped in that respect, as I didn't care to see it in theatres since I assumed it wouldn't be too interesting. I was way wrong on that one.
Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)
Jar Jar the sith lord
I saw this movie first when I was a kid and I loved it and Jar Jar. I legit just thought Liam Neeson was Qui Gon, and he is a very cool jedi. Watching this film as an adult now though, I can see why such a highly anticipated film was hugely disappointing for a lot of the original fans. The franchise that people nostalgized and glorified as time went by played right back into some of the cheesier aspects of the originals (specifically "A New Hope"), but the original fans were older with higher expectations and wanted something higher in artistic quality. No matter, one way of correcting the many wrongs of the franchise since would be to canonize Jar Jar as the ultimate sith lord, cuz why not? Maybe not, but there's no denying this film is still from a more worthy pre-Disney era of the galaxy from a long long time ago.
Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones (2002)
come on now
I just cannot fathom how Lucas decided to write and direct this film. I cannot deny his ideas are epic and better than maybe anyone in cinema history, but my GOD plz just hire another screenwriter. I find it hard to blame Christensen too much for his performance, as while it was downright creepy at times, like, you don't have to use those takes!!! Offer the kid some freaking direction! Maybe don't write such creepy lines for him to say! Or, you know, hire an established actor for one of the most anticipated roles to ever be cast... My oh my, I just can't. I will always love this franchise and this film, if only for the idea of it. But come on now George. Come on.
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)
same old Lucas
This film is the embodiment of the best and worst of George Lucas. It has an amazing storyline and wonderfully constructed plot, but the screenplay and direction is lacking. Not nearly enough development of Anakin's character is shown for the biggest turn in the entire series, and the scene in which he kills younglings is just completely unnecessary. They could've shown him killing other Jedi in the temple or something, but come on, that's a little dark for a movie you wanna bring your kids to. Plz don't imply the main character kills children in a children's movie. Now, those frustrating moments in the script still can't take away from the quality of the story and the fact this is obviously a good film.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)
Likable at best
I don't think it's possible to love this film in the Jones franchise, as it just has too many cheesy moments (a greaser fight scene? Really?) but I'm still here for it. It's watchable, and Ford is always good in these things. The alien twist is most definitely an odd choice of direction, but hey - might as well try, right? Maybe not tho. It was a weird decision, especially making them like alive by the end. Still tho, it's likable enough to watch if you don't know what else to do, and kids will probably like it.
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)
meh
This film is the epitome of mindless entertainment. That doesn't mean it's not worth a watch tho, as the plot is amusing enough, and there are certainly worse movies out there. It did enough for me to be slightly above average, so I gave it a 6.
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984)
alright throughout
I watched this movie immediately after seeing the first one since there was a marathon on tv. It certainly passed the time. Ford is fun, and he does his usual thing, but it gets kinda repetitive and goes on a little too long by the end. I didn't change the channel though, so I feel like that says something.
Alpha Rift (2021)
acting carries this one
Alright so I love an independent film centered on gaming, especially one with Lance Henriksen (Aliens, Predator, The Terminator). I also greatly appreciated the acting of Nielsen (Mare of Easttown) and Dalla Villa too. I thought the three of them in particular elevated a rather average script to have some endearing moments. Despite the fact this film seems not to be able to commit to what it should be (a kid's film in the vein of "Journey to the Center of the Earth" would've been the best approach), I can't help but rate it maybe better than it deserves. The acting by the main three deserves that much, and they made me like this one.
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)
Best of the originals
Out of all the Indiana Jones films, this one works the best. The give all the characters some emotional depth, which you cannot say about a lot of the other films in this franchise. I think it has good value that can still be seen in it.
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (2005)
Faithful adaptaion
I have to start by saying that I love Liam Neeson's voice, he is perfect as Aslan. This movie is an easy family flick that has some emotional depth to boot. The graphics are solid too, and I love the costumes. Good job Disney!