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Reviews
Avenue 5 (2020)
Hilarious Satire of Corporate Control
This was one of the funniest series have seen in years. The use of satire, from the passengers, to the Judd corporation is fantastic. It makes fun of some many levels in today's world. You have to just sit back, see it for the comedy of making fun of what a cruise ship could be like controlled by a corporation. Hugh Laurie of course makes the cast a success, but the clever use of even small comedy areas in the background is great. You have to allow yourself several episodes before you start to follow the characters and why their actions are later deemed funny. Don't be surprised by the end of the second season you will be wishing you could have a season three.
Joe Pickett (2021)
Poorly Written and Directed
There are so many fails, it really makes the story stupid. This must be the first cheap film this guy directed. Each "show" is wrought with fails from climate to law to human response. For example: What husband puts his kids down to sleep for 6 minutes knowing wife is answering late night phone call from doctor about her blood work? Really? Director obviously is not married or in any relationship.
The Day Time Ended (1979)
Alien Gumby and his Prehistoric Clay Friends
Before CGI, there were people in rubber suits and clay figures to scare you. Certainty not in the worse film category and it brings back memories of those films my parents allowed me to watch since to them it was completely stupid. Remember Clutch Cargo and the human lips in the cartoon faces where the voices did match up? This film is better than that!
The Invitation (2015)
S L O O O O O O W
The first hour was a complete waste of time, almost pointless. Save your sanity and wash the dishes or surf the net for the first hour. The last half slowly begins to reveal the point of the movie. It could have been worse, but not by much.
Don't Speak (2020)
Best Movie They Have Shown At Our Prison In Years
Usually on my cell block they pick stupid movies, but this was really scary and kept me up all night with my cell mate. It reminded me of 40 years ago when they they showed Amityville Horror on our cell block and I was up all night. Acting was better than most of my cell block brothers when they do plays in the cafeteria area. Luckily my cell mate was able to hold me when I would have nightmares about this film.
The Lucky One (2012)
Little Too Much Fake Testosterone
Good film, but all the men in the film from the Ex, to Efron, to even the mayor must be prescribed too much testosterone prior to filming. Efron has some real psychological issues and is trying too much to actually be a man, he missed the mark. I liked him better when he played the female parts of films. He must be confused on male and female lifestyle. All the other men are mean or just unfriendly. Should have just made the film about a woman home from the war who hooks up with the kennel owner. By the way, the book in concrete is BS. It would have rotted out within a year.
Missile to the Moon (1958)
Great for No CGI or Actual Knowledge of the Moon
I love these old space films where there was no CGI and the design/art was what they could make with their hands or change with lighting. After all, this is made 3 years before the first man flies in space and 11 years before the first man walks on the moon. So they can only guess what space flight would be like. The other favorite fact about these early space films is what they thought rockets would be like if you traveled in them and mostly what they thought the moon landscape would be. Caves on the Moon?? Why not. Seemed reasonable to think that telescopes could only see so much, so maybe there could be caves. Of course a race of colored blue women and a giant spider might be stretching the possibility, but thinking caves might be on the moon, even rock creatures, sure. I think my secret favorite shot of the film is towards the end as they are escaping in the ship, the large cuckoo clock hanging on the wall behind them. Just good ol' early space films.
Out of Death (2021)
Not Your Die Hard Bruce Willis
Suppose to be set in South Georgia, but the forest of banana plants clearly puts it sub-tropical. The entire plot which should span several days appears to occur only within a few minutes. So in the middle of the "forest" dirty deputies do something bad. Witness stumbles upon it and then runs. "Hours" later they find witness hiding nearby, but luckily Bruce appears from behind a banana plant. Then hours or days go by??? And suddenly Bruce appears again among the banana plants.
Here is what really happened. The low-budget film needed a big name. So they asked Bruce if they could film in his back acres of his estate in Puerto Rico. He said yes, but only allowed them one acre to film in. They then cleared paths with a bush hog cutter in an over-grown area of Bruce's property so everybody would have trails to run down. They then paid Bruce 50% of the film cost in exchange for him walking out of his house a couple of times to do the filming. I imagine he would be sitting in his house watching tv, they would knock and ask him to come hold the gun next to a tree and yell something. Five minutes later he was back inside his house $25k richer. On the positive side, all the actors get to say they worked with Bruce Willis.
Of course if you like this film and thought it was dramatic, then you don't get out of your mother's basement much.
We Need to Do Something (2021)
Poorly Written - Failed Script/ Good Nap Time!
So imagine you and your entire family are trapped in the bathroom for days because the door is stuck from a thunderstorm. You slowly all die. The story would have been better if a heavy blanket had been blown over them and weighted them down. The liberal family is incapable of getting out because they can't solve anything for themselves. They are thirsty and needing water, but they can't drink from the faucet or tub until the dad finishes the coffee from his thermos so the mom can fill it and pass it around.
The actors are okay, but they only did this stupid movie so they would not have to go back waiting tables at work. I only watched this because the movie came on the tv and I could not find the remote. Of course I could not get up and manually change it since the cat was on my lap. Luckily I fell asleep after about 30 minutes and got a good nap in.....so it wasn't a total waste, it did allow me to catch up on some zzzzzz.
Shattered City: The Halifax Explosion (2003)
Good. Except Wrong
Although a true story about the wreck and the explosion, no evidence was found of German spies in the city and certainly no German spies tried to scuttle the ship to save thousands of lives. To give credit to the German army for their actions in WWI in this movie is a disgrace to Canadians and Norwegians and all civilized peoples everywhere. You might as well say that the Ottoman Empire worked closely with the Germans to try and save lives. Could have been a great movie about history and the loss of innocent life, but it's message is that German spies attempted to save the city. Probably written and directed by people with a family history tied to Germany and wanting everyone to think that they were not that bad. After all, they only attacked other countries w/o provocation with the assistance of the Ottoman Empire in 1917. It's not like 25 years later they got really bad or anything.
Retfærdighedens ryttere (2020)
Nothing Fake, Just Great Action
I am an action fanatic, but most films have far-fetched action that are really unrealistic. But this Danish film even with English subs kept me interested and ready for my own brand of payback. It takes a minute to get going, but once the payback starts, it's incredible. One of the best foreign films I've seen for realistic killing and it's not fake looking. Guys don't fall back 20 feet after getting shot, nobody is jumping from a helicopter through a roof to shoot people. It's just good ol' street justice. Very well done on how tough guy bands with computer geeks and science guys as they pool their knowledge for this action packed retaliation. Not sure why it says comedy/action as type, but I guess there are few light-hearted spots, but all films have that. I would say it's more action/drama, than comedy.
Alone (2015)
True Survival Except Alone - The Beast
First few seasons were great and believable. So many times females would out-survive the males, but I guess Alone producers really needed to fake one for females, so they created Alone-The Beast (ATB). All the males quickly tap out early. Really???? Sad that Alone dropped to that level when you see so many males and females really surviving in the wild on earlier seasons. The filming was great in the first 8 seasons, but ATB was lacking. Females have always kicked a$$ on Alone, but we don't need a guaranteed win. Shame on the male producers for not seeing the truth. Do real reality not fakality.
Don't Look Up (2021)
Spoof about Hillary as President
One of the funniest films I have ever seen. Unfortunately it could have actually come true on some levels. Throughout the movie you see overtones of Democrat decisions. Too bad it did not come out last year to show the possible destruction of what they can do to an entire planet with their misdirection and failed leadership.
The Escape of Prisoner 614 (2018)
Dry Humor Throughout Movie
I'm not sure how they did it, but the writer and actors made this movie hilarious throughout the film. Every scene had either dry humor lines or something in the scene that was dry humor. One of the best comedy films I have seen in years. Actors were so good at using dry humor that they came across as realistic.
It could have been set in the 1920s or the 1980s or anywhere in between. It could have been trickery, but I'm pretty sure it was chicory.
Earth Has Fallen (2021)
S l O W Sleepy Silent Movie
Not a single word spoken by the actor. Of course, that was probably a good thing considering the story was horrible. At the end of the movie, thank goodness it ended, I thought it would have been better if the screen would have just been black for the entire time too. Then I could have slept and got something out of my time. There was nothing realistic or similar to what a real person would do in a situation. Oh, by the way, there are several other people without lines either, just a bunch of close-up shots of faces to give you that "look" of emotion.
I suggest you watch it for 10 minutes, then you will understand how the entire movie is and you will go watch paint dry before you watch this.
The Stand at Paxton County (2020)
Horror - Government Control
This true story is not about diseased and abused animals, but a diseased and abusive government. Once animal rights activists start twisting the simple-minded government officials, the scourge runs rampant throughout the rural areas. Sad it still continues to spread throughout America.
La casa de papel (2017)
Top 5 of Heist Movies Ever
I was surprised how entertaining this series was. It's 5 parts ( 5 seasons) and it keeps you entertained on every episode. The truth is, it is more realistic than most other great heist movies. Oceans 11, Inception and The Sting may have great actors, but this film is definitely entertaining. Set in Spain and dubbed in English, it's still great.
Bloodline: Part 32 (2017)
Writers are on Cocaine
This is what happens when the writers do lines of coke and then write the script. I'm sure the actors didn't care either since the show was being canceled. The office talk went something like this, "We are all out of jobs, lets do lines of coke and write the next to last episode.
Zoo (2015)
Loss of Major Actress similar to New Coke
I enjoyed the show, although some really stupid animal or creature attacks. But luckily almost every scene had Chloe (Nora Arnezeder). However, once she was killed off, there was no more hot babe to root for. So I found other interests.
According to info, they wanted to "shake up" the show, but what they really did was eliminate Coke and create New Coke. Clearly the reason why Zoo was canceled.
Look in Any Window (1961)
Bad porno lines w/o the nudity
So the reason this did not make a good movie or was even remembered as a good film: The story is about every neighbor in the neighborhood being either a bored housewife or a cheating man. What makes this a porno is the corny porn lines like, - you like chocolate cake, would you like to try some, come on over - or - I forgot to buy light bulbs for the house, but we can light a candle - or- night swimming relaxes me because I have been so tense. The best part was a husband that heads to Vegas in his convertible, but stops in front of the female neighbor. She then jumps in and they make out in front of their two houses....really???
The entire movie is set around a group of sexually charged adults who are unhappy in their own lives, so they hook up with the next door neighbors. The only thing missing is the delivery guy saying he has a package for the lady.
Communion (1989)
Two Scary Things
Two very scary things about this movie. 1- The anal probe coming out of the wall left me less than comfortable. 2- The fact that I just wasted 1.47 hours of my life watching a movie that made no sense, had the least scary aliens ever and that they wasted 5 million dollars on this movie. Thank goodness I didn't have to pay to see this.
And the reason for 3 stars as opposed to 1 star? Quality actors and good film techniques.
Guilt (2020)
Keeps you interested
First off, she is a bad-ass. It does have a clever twist in the middle that make you think, but other than that, you are all in for Vigilante Jessie. Wish we had more vigilantes in the world.
Flora (2017)
Not Bad
I like sci-fi, but for a group of newbies, this film was pretty good. The acting was good and the writing was good too. Kind of similar to The Happening, but on a very very low budget.
Main Street (2010)
Watching Paint Dry
So it has some great actors, but after an hour and half you want to stick a pencil in your brain or somebody's brain for wasting your time. Now I was stuck watching it because the other inmates had chosen Prime this Tuesday evening. I begged to go back to my cell, but only one guard was available and he enjoys movies as exciting as watching paint dry, so we watched too. .
The Two Faces of January (2014)
Realistic and entertaining.
This is one of those hidden gems. You get sucked in quickly and realize you could easily be Rydal (the acquaintance), sucked into what you think is a small problem and now your in deep crap. This has action every few minutes that keeps you on the edge of your seat. It is a fast moving film. Great movie.