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Reviews
The Dead Pool (1988)
The Dead Pool
Harry's two favourite words are back: "marvelous" and "swell". Oh and that means Harry is back with a new partner, this one is actually funny at times.
I want to start by criticising the laziness of the use of Welcome To The Jungle, as well as attributing horror films like It's Alive 3 and Creature From The Black Lagoon (among others) to fictional film director with a particular set of skills, Peter Swan.
Now I want to continue by praising the car chase scene, which is inventive but implausible. When you watch it stop to wonder how any of it can be happening. But it is very good and welcome.
Harry has to contend with contrived imbeciles acting as his superiors again and, of course, is incredibly rude to them. Why is he not fired? Fire this man and lock him up when he gets himself in trouble!
So Dirty Harry ends on a tongue in cheek bang. Marvelous! Swell! Thank God for that.
No Popwell this time.
Death Wish 4: The Crackdown (1987)
Death Wish 4
As always the spirit of Kersey has managed to get himself back into a good place only for the evil of Satan to get back into his life and ruin it. This time it's drugs and organised crime rather than street thugs that decimate his inner kingdom.
The spirit of Kersey is, as always, dragged down into hell to become of evil in order that he will dispassionately clean up the streets and this time he is up against some serious problems.
Despite the absence of the great Michael Winner this film fits into the franchise very well and it is the first film of the series to have a plot with twists and turns. It's a good film.
Sudden Impact (1983)
Sudden Impact
Harry's new favourite word is "swell" and he just can't stop saying it ironically. He is also up to his old tricks again: right at the start his case is thrown out under the same circumstances as the first film, and just as in the first film Harry is shocked to hear that he has broken the law.
Why hasn't this man been fired? He is a headache for his superiors, rude and arrogant to his superiors, doesn't know the law despite it being his only job, costs the city millions, and his illegal arrests count for nothing. What's wrong with this man? Self-righteous and irritating. He also has an ugly farting dog with him here.
Anyway this is the most interesting Dirty Harry film because it is set in the mind of Sondra Locke's character.
She is getting revenge on a bunch of devils and manifests a Christ-like figure in Dirty Harry to unknowingly help and protect her. She draws him in from the chaotic wilderness of her mind and he can't stop it from happening.
Albert Popwell: Horace.
Death Wish 3 (1985)
Death Wish 3
The spirit of Kersey is back and is plunged into hell once again. He cannot get away from the evil that plagues him and here he comes up against hordes and hordes of demonic spirits who are wreaking pure havoc in his inner kingdom.
This time he has help from innocent citizens, which shows that his light is illuminating the paths of his other spirits and emboldening them in a good way.
It is wildly entertaining but not gory enough. The sleaze and violence is less impactful than that of the previous entry, the great Death Wish 2, and overall it is more tongue in cheek. I would have appreciated a lot more blood and gore for what happens in this film as that would have made it monumental.
The Enforcer (1976)
The Enforcer
Here Harry's new favourite world is "marvellous", only to be said ironically of course. Yes he is back for a third time, doing nothing but causing destruction, being irresponsible, dealing with superiors who chide him and scapegoat him rather than fire him for being a complete idiot.
What's Harry all about here? Doing his "duty" and moaning and moping about it like an overgrown teenager. Now he is paired up with a woman who is mostly there for comic relief, and Bradford Dillman is the contrived superior with an obsession for Harry.
There's a lot of running around in this one, some exciting chases, and familiar faces. On a par with Magnum Force.
Albert Popwell: Mustafah.
Magnum Force (1973)
Magnum Force
Here we go again with Harry Callahan, looking cool but being a complete beta with his pretentious one-liners and scowling.
This time he is upset about being mugged of his hard-done-by renegade image by a bunch of crooked cops taking the law into their own hands and he must stop them because before long all the cops will be as bad as him and he won't be unique anymore.
It's a bit better than the first film, Harry isn't such a child here, and Hal Holbrook is very good as Mr Evil. It's an intriguing plot with more character development for Harry. I also like his partner.
But then how lazy could they be injecting a hot girlfriend out of nowhere for Harry to suddenly care about? Why insult me with such laziness? At least there was no time wasted in the first film with romance.
Albert Popwell: Pimp.
Death Wish (1974)
Death Wish
This is about the traumatised mind. Once Kersey's loved ones are defiled beyond repair he begins to transmutate from a bleeding-heart liberal to a stone cold avenger.
The muggers who accost him at night are the demons of his imagination. The manifestations of untrammeled scumbags are constant and he can only defend himself with a gun- a gun that came to him in the wake of the traumatic event, much like the evildoers do.
To watch Death Wish is like watching the kingdom within fall to satan after something nasty happens in your life. Everything changes and evil wills those changes constantly in the mind to not only keep your pain levels up, but to drag you down to its level in the bottomless bowels of hell.
There is no end, a fact that is illustrated perfectly through Bronson's Kersey.
Dirty Harry (1971)
Dirty Harry
Dirty Harry has a reputation as being one of, if not the, coolest fictional cops on film. He looks cool, but in reality he is a whining whinger. He incessantly screws up, costing the tax payer untold fortunes, and takes absolutely no responsibility.
He is a seasoned homicide detective and doesn't even know what the laws are. Then when he is informed that his law-breaking antics have jeopardised the investigation, rather than being accountable he looks shocked and blames the law.
All the way through the film he is repeatedly shown to be put upon by his "dumb" superiors. It is an exhausting experience watching Harry storm out of offices, scowling, and in such a way that I am supposed to be on his side.
Then there's his monologues and one-liners which, though culturally iconic, take suspension of disbelief to whole new heights.
He puts the public at risk, flouts the law, causes serious damage to the urban environment, moans and scowls like a teenage boy, gets his partners killed, is rude and abusive to all of his superiors, and messes everything up to the point where he ends up on a vigilante rampage.
Andrew Robinson is excellent as the killer. He is a real monster and a joy to watch. The OST is also great.
But what is the film about? It is about rebellion, pure and simple. Dirty Harry is the Bart Simpson of movie cops, dressed up as a "right wing" hero.
Albert Popwell: Armed Robber.
Chaotix (1995)
KNUCKLES' CHAOTIX
This is the only spin off game that I play alongside the main series. It's great. It gets a lot of hate from people who get frustrated by the tether mechanic but let me tell you, if you give it time you'll realise that you can move accurately and with great speed!
Play as Knuckles, Espio, Mighty, Charmy, Vector, Bomb and Heavy through tower block levels of platforming madness! Bonus stages inspired by a small animated scene from SONIC CD, truly classic special stages, and bosses marginally harder than those of SONIC CD!
I love it.