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The Family Plan (2023)
Exactly what we should expect from MW
Mark Wahlberg is a very successful and competent participant in the entertainment industry. His most enjoyable roles place tactfully little pressure on his talents. Those roles use mild humor to avoid any expectation of dramatic acting. They use stunt crews and action sequences to fill out the standard 115 minutes of run time. This is one of those roles. And, typically, it does not disappoint. It doesn't disappoint because our expectations are solidly aimed at the bulls eye, going in. We all know what MW will give us, and he always does. Wahlberg is the MacDonalds of entertainment. No matter where we find him, we know what to expect, and he delivers exactly that, no more, no less. I suppose this is of some comfort, in this unpredictable world.
Alias: Q & A (2002)
Stunning effects work...
...that is, bad. Stunningly bad effects work. The very first sequence in the episode ends with Sydney driving her car off a pier into the water. I was not out looking for mistakes; I was just watching the show. But, suddenly, staring me right in the face, almost waving to me, was the cable they used to drag the car off the pier. Then, also screaming for my attention, were the front wheels turned fully to the left although the car was being dragged straight forward. Obviously, they had not been secured in a straight-forward position for the effect. And no attempt to hide the cable had been made. It's like the effects team didn't show up for the shoot that day. The director just told his production assistant to get it done somehow. Unbelievable.
Outlander (2014)
Evil Woman
Our protagonist and hero, Jamie, is a strong, honorable 18th century Scot who, through no fault of his own, is saddled with an evil, gaslighting megalomaniacal witch time traveling from the 1940s. Our self-centered, bumbling antagonist, Claire, holds forth her own deluded self-image as en erstwhile Virgin Mary, while causing, by her schemes and misdeeds, the death and destruction of anyone lured in to become close to her. While repeatedly declaring herself "unable" to kill, even in defense of her loved ones, she leaves the dirty work to those very same loved ones, who, without exception, pay the price. This path of desolation is nonetheless invisible to her, as she blithely proceeds on her egotistical course to be reunited with the devil's offspring back in the 20th century, her husband, Frank. Naturally, we despise Claire. We despise her ignorant self-confidence as she argues without a trace of logic for the righteousness of her ill-conceived plans. We despise her interminable readiness to send men who love her into death's arms on the strength of her conceited, myopic mission. We ask ourselves, do we have the stomach to keep watching? I mean, how much hating of this evil woman can we stand? Our soul is turning black, of it.
Rookie Blue (2010)
High School Musical with cops
This is basically just High School Musical without the songs, but all the characters are above the age of consent, and the locale is a police station instead of a high school. That is the level of drama we're talking. Lots of "who likes who", secrets held and exposed, and anxiety about graduation. Anything else going on is purely incidental. Of course, these rookie kids are all extraordinarily important to the outcome of any police work being done; just like real life, I'm sure. So, don't think The Wire or Southland or anything like that. This is High School Musical, Gossip Girls, 90121, etc. Just set your expectations at the right level.
How I Met Your Mother: Not a Father's Day (2008)
Props to the set director! 😉
Time to notice the fine work of Susan Mina Eschelbach, set director on this and most other episodes. For example, this show has the best, realistic set wine. Normally the liquid they pour from wine bottles on TV is a weak, pinkish, translucent water. This even when it's coming from Bordeaux bottles that are supposed to be expensive. It makes my stomach turn. But none of that for Ms. Eschenbach, no. The set wine on HIMYM is a deep, velvety color, with body like good Malbec or Australian cab/merlot blend. It makes me want to cork up a bottle and sip along with Robin and Lily. These things must be pointed out, to herald the talent of rarely mentioned contributors.
Only Murders in the Building: Persons of Interest (2022)
Oh God, not Cara...
Cara Dele-wince must have a great agent to get her a gig with these real actors. The saving grace is that her character is supposed to pretending to be someone she's not. That is Cara's idea of acting, pretending to be someone else. Like she pretends to be an actor. But her eyes tell us she doesn't believe any of her own pretenses. And neither do we. What was the producers' thought process here? A "fresh face?" Maybe her model background would lend the right arrogance for the character? Maybe financing was involved? Well, maybe she won't be too distracting in the following episodes? I'm not too hopeful....
Running with the Devil (2019)
A GOOD Cage film!
This is far better than you might expect from an under-the-radar Nicolas Cage film. The dialogue is very good and delivered honestly by a very competent cast. The story is believable (except for the bit about flying and skydiving, where they could have used a consultant). The editing made it concise and effective. There is a raw, unadorned feeling to the whole production. The arc finished the tale off in a very satisfying way without giving me time to check my watch. This is a successful film and one to be proud of. And, it shows that with good quality material, Cage is a very likable, convincing actor. I'm happy to see him in a film like this, for a change.
The Out-Laws (2023)
Should have been funny...
...but wasn't. Adam Devine can be very funny. Pierce Brosnan can be very funny. The premise could be very funny. But none of them was, in this movie. I love to praise good writing, but when the writing is dull it must be said. The writing is dull. The gags were uninventive. To be fair, the actors did what they could, and they did force the material into the realm of "mildly amusing" a few times. But even these pros couldn't make this disaster of a script funny. Not to even mention the huge bail-out of an ending that just... well, I can't even. So, don't waste your time. Watch a few reruns of parks and recreation, instead.
The Swarm: Episode #1.8 (2023)
Doesn't work that way...
It's a shame Oceangate had to give us all a quick course in the mechanics of deep-water diving. Now we all know what the effects of 400 atmospheres are on diving vessels, not to mention the human body. So, the final scenes, while poetic and hopeful in their way, stand out as completely divorced from reality. No submersible intended for depths of more than a few tens of meters could be built with a panoramic viewing window taking up half the circumference of the ships girth, like the one seen here. Likewise, opening a port to the water would require first pressurizing the airlock to 400 atmospheres, which would not be survivable for anyone in the lock. Damn my brain for not letting me ignore all that and just humor the fairytale being told....
Will Trent (2023)
Not best in class, but good
It's difficult for an amateur to identify what it is that separates the script for a series like this from, say, The Wire, which to me felt like elite drama. One aspect, however occurs to me, and that is the use of false conflict to inject emotion into the script. In this show (and many others on this level), people get mad for no reason. An example is Trent's boss, who throws the kind of "demanding boss laying down the line" anger his way. But the writers have her doing this when the two of them are in agreement. There is no conflict in the situation, only in the dialogue. I recognize this kind of facile shortcut from so many "cop shows", it seems like it must be in the TV script writers' manual for idiots. But consider The Wire, or Billions, or West Wing, or any of the elite dramas; You never find that kind of false conflict in the script. So, that's one thing....
The Swarm: Episode #1.6 (2023)
Well...
...this just took a silly turn. An unnecessarily silly turn. I was intrigued, up to now. This episode just pushed the story into the realm of "monster movie", which, for me, was a disappointment. One problem is that the pacing of it better serves a more serious, plausible idea. A monster movie requires much greater tension and quicker jabs of threat and release, e.g., Alien. Maybe this will describe the coming episodes, we'll see. My feeling now is that I t's a shame. The indigenous defense mechanisms of the natural world moving to protect the Earth from mankind, seemed to me to be a much more powerful story line. Monsters are, after all, pretty silly.
The Mother (2023)
As expected, unfortunately.
JLo has never really been an actor, so action is a good play for her. Unfortunately, that formula puts all the burden on action, plot and dialogue, the latter two of which are badly lacking in this movie. There is nothing about the plot that raises in us the barest whiff of uncertainty about what's going to happen next. It is as predictable and stimulating as a Sunday church service. While the dialogue seems as if written by an AI that's been fed solely on 80s cop shows. The cliches, once you start to track them, grate on the ear like a bad ad jingle playing on repeat. My reaction to this sort of nonchalance is, perhaps egotistically, to be insulted. How could anyone with a conscience lure me into wasting an hour of my time trying to find anything entertaining in this beige shadow of a film?
Florida Man (2023)
Just weird
To begin with, all the technical aspects of this, like cinematography, sound, lighting, costumes, hair, locations, sets, music, etc., are all professionally done. So, it takes a couple beats before we start to see that things are just off. Like, the largest elephant in the room, our protagonist, who has no Latin-American background at all, is played by a Venezuelan who hasn't been able to train away his heavy accent. Were we just supposed to ignore that? Then we notice a queasy feeling because we can't get if the script is supposed to be funny/satirical or dark/heavy or clever/intricate.... what are they going for? Oh, and then things start to clarify and we see that it isn't any of that. It's just banal and derivative. This is a student film dressed up in big-boy pants. Nothing to see here, folks. Just move along....
Unstable (2023)
Quirky Lowe redux
It's a little disappointing that this show is built around what is basically Rob Lowe's character from Parks & Rec. Any fan of that show has probably already gotten everything they can out of that guy. The same manic drive for perfection, odd self-absorbed monologue regardless of who's standing in front of him. You take that out of the mix and all you have is support characters and environments we're already used to from shows like Brooklyn 99 and Mythic Quest. So, it's ok, but every episode seems like we've already seen it. The plot points are predictable, the comedy simple and mechanical. I give it a six because I like Rob Lowe, but this is pretty empty.
Widows (2018)
Even better than you hoped
There is so much great stuff in this film. The story is fresh, with only a minimum of "good luck" needed to get from A to B. The actors need no introduction, and the dialogue is authentic so they can do their best. Beyond that is some first-class directing to give it all that raw, real-life feel. And the cinematography perfectly carries the mood with lighting and framing. I was sucked completely into the world of these characters, never coming up until the final credits. That is what you want from a film. Special kudos for avoiding any hint of "9 to 5" vibe. This was no cute girl club. These were people in a bad situation not of their own making, people who'd been conned and betrayed. People who had to stand up and fight for their survival. I'm OK with a happy ending, given that.
The Great Gatsby (2013)
A cartoon
Baz Luhrmann has made a live-action cartoon. He could be forgiven, seeing that this is fully the fifth (!) time the novel has been done on film. Something different becomes harder to devise with that many cycles through the material. But this cartoon has bright colors, loud sounds, obvious dialogue, broad acting depicting narrow, one-dimensional characters, and arrow-straight plot development, meant to spoon feed today's attention deficit- afflicted audiences. All of which is in direct conflict with the novel, none of which does it any justice. He might better have named the film, "Nick Carraway's Day Off," and let people draw their own conclusions about provenance. On its own, freed from our expectations, it could be an enjoyable spectacle.
The Humans (2021)
Film and theatre
A fan of both film and theatre will love this. The cinematography is used to full effect in creating focus to contextualize the dialogue and set the mood. Just seeing Richard Jenkins' name in the cast should attract the right audience; he is a lightning rod for excellent scripts. There is no "horror" element in this film, unless it would be the horror of facing our frailties and mortality, loss and fear of failure. What started out as a fine play for the stage was heightened with cinematic arts. A real tour de force. The cast is wonderful, with Amy Schumer holding her own among much more experienced pros.
Blue Bloods (2010)
Compromise, forthwith!!
Ok, first of all, who on the writing staff is so in love with the word "forthwith"? Not a single episode passes without somebody uttering this Elizabethan exclamation. Who of us, in our actual lives, has ever heard anyone use the word "forthwith" in actual conversation? I almost start to suspect this is some kind of writers' goof; "How many times can we pepper in this weird word without people noticing?" Or do they think this is some kind of signal-word the audience will subconsciously take as proof that the cop family, despite all evidence to the contrary, is "smart"? In any case, this is a series of compromises, strange dialogue being on the one hand, and some good acting in spots on the other (mostly by Tom Selleck, who has both gravitas and chops enough to make even clumsy dialogue work on the screen). Compromise, like the irony of the repeated plot point of the "top cop" not playing on the tragedy of 9/11, while the series itself shamelessly trades on the tragedy of 9/11; and the actual story arcs, which are often engaging and well-written. Or just the compromise of Donnie Wahlberg's acting, which is clumsy and exaggerated one minute, while solemn and authentic the next. All in all, I can understand that the series is still going strong. The lesson might be that compromise is where you find popularity and advertisers' revenue. Which is probably producer 101. But it's also probably the reason we will never see another Hill Street Blues.
Shrinking (2023)
I want more Jessica Williams!
And the rest of the show is great, too. Jason Segel is perfectly cast for this script. He has the weird, idiotically confident energy needed for this role. And Jessica is perfect. Her humor is just right for the dialogue. This is the new way of situation dramedies. No real punch lines, just engaging personalities with a pinch of quirk, and family circumstances that are just a little over the line from normal, but still relatable. Of course, Jimmy's behavior as a therapist is completely absurd. You would lose your license immediately. Just impossible. But we allow metaphorical situations in drama. And in this script, we sense a strong purposefulness in the decisions. We have to give the writers the benefit and try to get the gist. For me, it's easy and fun. Other reviewers, apparently, struggled.
The Recruit (2022)
Great action; Hollywood dialogue
It's a weird thing that characters talk like they're on a episode of Friends and then start shooting each other. TV writers have learned that directors and stunt teams can choreograph great, realistic action sequences with a minimum of plot points to work with. Unfortunately, they can't handle character development and dialogue. The writers have to do that part. But they all live in the sheltered world of sunny Southern California, or similar places and have no clue what those personalities are really like. So all the characters seem to be from the same formula. The talent it takes to write characters like those from House of Cards or Billions is rare. It's like trying to find enough really good quarterbacks for all the NFL teams. There just aren't enough to go around. So we end up with this stuff and Jack Ryan and Reacher etc. Entertaining but you have to be forgiving when you watch it and manage your expectations.
Miami Vice: Lend Me an Ear (1987)
Deja vu
This episode reminds me of the 1974 F. F. Coppola film "The Conversation" starring Gene Hackman as the surveillance expert whose paranoia drives him nuts at the end. The fantastic closing scene of him tearing his own apartment apart millimeter by millimeter, looking for bugs. In this case, the expert is playing both sides, so the route to paranoia is short and direct. And, the concept is introduced early by the character himself, in so many words, so we know what's coming. I have to imagine that Michael Mann was thinking of the film; after all, who could resist a nod to Coppola? Just another reason Miami Vice was so much fun.
Everybody Loves Raymond: Marie and Frank's New Friends (2000)
Dumb is funny
Ray Romano is, next to Adam Sandler, the most successful proponent of the I'm-dumb-as-a-stone-and-it's-funny school of comedy. The Ray Barrone character is, as lightly veiled as one can be, Ray himself. In America, tragically stupid is funny. Or at least, it was until the real-life exponent sat in the White House for four years, flamboyantly destroying the representative democracy we used to count on. It's less funny when the real consequences of idiocy come to life. So, now it's not as easy for me to enjoy stupidity as it once was. Part of the attraction was that it "could never happen" in real life. But now we know that's no longer the case.
Columbo: Fade in to Murder (1976)
William Shatner as a caricature of himself
This was so much fun. Shatner is cast as an overacting actor. This episode was filmed in '76, just a couple years before Shatner's famous tongue-in-cheek slow reading of Bernie Taupin's Rocket Man lyrics. He was into self satire, and this part must have been just perfect. And, to guest star across from Peter Falk, whose whole Lieutenant Columbo character is a kind of sly winking send-up, must have been irresistible. In this episode, Columbo lets the actor over-act himself off to the hoosegow. Not a departure from the show's reliable formula, but a fun angle on it. The Columbo franchise really was a fantastic meeting place for all the top TV actors of the day.
The Crown: Queen Victoria Syndrome (2022)
Difficult casting choices
Jonathan Price is an excellent actor, and I've enjoyed his work in so many productions. Nonetheless, casting him as Prince Phillip doesn't work. Pryce as a person has far too much empathy in his bearing, too little "pomp". Tobias Menzies, although not the right age for this season, brought the Duke's royal arrogance and aloof carelessness perfectly to the character. Pryce just cannot void himself of his warm humanity sufficiently for the part. Also difficult is the casting of Dominic West as Prince Charles. West oozes a masculine strength and independence completely foreign to the winging, acquiescent Prince. The petulant boy who agrees to marry one woman, because his mother tells him to, while selfishly carrying on with his lover, could never be found in the abundantly self-assured personality of West.
Irresistible (2020)
Of course John Stewart knocks it out of the park
Production quality is superb in all aspects, but the real triumph is the writing. The story is completely plausible, and important, and entertaining, and frightening, and enlightening. Stewart picks a topic he knows well, has researched thoroughly, and cares deeply about. He presents it expertly so that we care about it, too. The topic of campaign finance reform is known as a political "third rail" because political operatives believe you die if you even touch it. And that may be true. Nonetheless it is the single source of the dysfunction that paralyzes our elected representatives. But how to deliver that message without putting people to sleep? For that, you need John Stewart.
We need John Stewart, even if we don't deserve him.