- Christy: [wearing a black leather jacket] Jill got this for me and said it was only $25, and I believe her!
- Bonnie: [opening her present] 'Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret'?
- Tammy: Remember when we were young and you would hide it under your mattress, and then at night we'd read it to each other?
- Bonnie: Oh my God, Tammy, I love this book!
- [hugs her]
- Christy: [proudly] You really crushed Secret Santa, Tammy.
- Tammy: [storms into the middle of the AA meeting] Tammy, alcoholic!
- Everyone: Hi Tammy.
- Tammy: [sits down] Make that unemployed alcoholic. Today a homeless guy came up to the drive-thru window, and he only had a dollar, but I hooked him up with a Loco Loco meal and a 48 ounce Mountain Dew. The next thing I know, big hearted Tammy is getting fired. If I don't have a job, I'm going to go back to prison... maybe I deserve to, if I can't even keep a job at a taco stand, what hope is there for me?