- Emily Martin: Jen, am I a bad person?
- Jen Morales: No. There's no way in hell you're a bad person. You're a good person... with really bad execution.
- Emily Martin: [7 years old Emily on video] Emily! You suck. Can't you just go one day without fucking something up.
- Emily Martin: I... I know that he was my cat, but Mr. Roosevelt meant a lot to Eric.
- Celeste Jones: Yeah. Yeah, he means a lot to me too.
- Eric Kline: Celeste and I live together.
- Emily Martin: In our...? Umm...
- Eric Kline: ...in my house.
- Art: Alright, well, you're not quirky but you're definitely kind of a bitch.
- Emily Martin: [mockingly] Thankyou.
- Art: You're welcome.