- Sherlock Holmes: You didn't know I play the violin?
- Captain Thomas Gregson: Before today, I didn't even know you ate food.
- Sherlock Holmes: The human face, Watson, is like the penis, or so said the great personality theorist Silvan Tomkins. The point being, the face, like the male member, has a mind of its own. It betrays us on an almost daily basis, advertises our secrets to those who know what to look for.
- Sherlock Holmes: Have I told you how distracting I find self-doubt? If you're going to wallow, may I ask that you do it in the privacy of your own room?
- Sherlock Holmes: Have you spoken to Callie's husband yet?
- Dr. Joan Watson: No, I called his art gallery, they said he's out of town until tonight. I'm going to pop in there tomorrow and do my best Colombo impression.
- [Holmes gives her a blank look]
- Dr. Joan Watson: It was a TV show... never mind.
- Sherlock Holmes: The question remains: how would the murder we think he is responsible for inspire his wife to leave the marriage a second time? How, in this case, does "A" lead to "B"?
- Dr. Joan Watson: [after a pause] Maybe "A" didn't lead to "B"... maybe "B" led to "A".