Doug Walker: Nostalgia Critic

Quotes 

• Nostalgia Critic : ...Leading us back to the Kennedy assassination, opening up the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, which means that Mario Lopez is a woman.

• Nostalgia Critic : [looking at himself in a mirror]  Who are you? Who am I?

• Nostalgia Critic : DiVinci knew about this and left secrets for us to find. Everything goes back to the number 23... wait, no, it's just a coincidence. Only strangers can lead us to paradise. It's all part of the illusion.