Blondie & Dagwood: Second Wedding Workout (1989 TV Short)

Frank Welker: Dagwood Bumstead, Mr. Ferguson

Quotes 

• Dagwood Bumstead : I'm gonna have to take the rest of the day off, Mr. Dithers.

  Julius Dithers : Take the rest of the what *where*?

  Dagwood Bumstead : I can't let Blondie down.

  Julius Dithers : [as Dagwood leaves]  Let 'er *down*? I'd always try to get the ole battle-axe something that'll just shut 'er up. Yick.

• Dagwood Bumstead : Maybe I'll be sent to one of those prisons that has a tennis court... Blondie!

• Julius Dithers : Like I said: there'll be a big, fat, juicy bonus in it for you.

  Dagwood Bumstead : Bonus? For me? Gosh, Blondie'll be so proud! And just in time for our...

  [gasps and babbles in bewilderment at the deadline for the Fergueson building to be completed] 

• Julius Dithers : Bumstead, I know that wedding's been on your mind a lot, but... icing swirls on the tenth floor?

  Dagwood Bumstead : Well, they...

  [a truck horn interrupts them, and they walk toward it] 

  Julius Dithers : What now, a truck full of doilies?

  Blondie Bumstead : [in the truck, with Cora at the wheel]  Hi, honey!

  Dagwood Bumstead : Huh?

  Julius Dithers : Oh, great, a truck full of Blondie.

  Blondie Bumstead : [getting out of the truck, then pulling a lever to reveal an inflating cathedral]  Cora told me you wouldn't make it to the church on time, so - we brought the church to you!

• Julius Dithers : Bumstead, I know that's the first bonus you've gotten in 18 years, but grab hold of yourself, man.

  Dagwood Bumstead : I can't, Mr. Dithers; today is my 20th anniversary.

  Julius Dithers : So what? Anniversaries are like headaches; ignore 'em long enough, they'll blow away.

• Dagwood Bumstead : [after he unknowingly loses Blondie's wedding ring, alerted by Daisy]  Daisy, get back here; this is no time for doggie gymnastics.

• Julius Dithers : [as the cathedral inflates]  Bumstead, what's going on? Your first obligation is to Fergueson!

  Dagwood Bumstead : Wrong, Mr. Dithers. My first obligation is to my bride, my wife - you know, Blondie.

• Dagwood Bumstead : [carrying a tall stack of gifts]  Great, no one's home. I'll just put these gifts away and...

  [we hear a car beep twice outside] 

  Dagwood Bumstead : Oh no! It's Blondie!

• Dagwood Bumstead : [after a rivet shoots into his pants]  Well, fortunately, Daisy, you'll never know what it's like to have a hot rivet up your pants. Eh, girl?

• Dagwood Bumstead : [popping up from the gifts that fell out of the closet]  Surprise! Happy anniversary, honey.

  Blondie Bumstead : [rising]  Surprise? But our anniversary isn't till next week.

  Dagwood Bumstead : Oh. Yeah, I knew that.

• Jewelry Store Clerk : Will that be cash, check, or...?

  Dagwood Bumstead : [handing the clerk his credit card]  Charge it. Thanks to that big, fat bonus, I'll be able to pay for it in full next pay day.

  Jewelry Store Clerk : Yes, sir.

• Julius Dithers : [first lines; on the phone]  Rest assured, Mr. Fergueson. The J.C. Dithers Company has been on the job for fourteen months, and we'll have your building renovation finished in no time at all.

  Mr. Fergueson : Good. Because that's exactly when I want it, Dithers. In no time at all!

  [bangs his fist on his desk on the word "all"] 

  Julius Dithers : [winces]  Well, if-if ever in that case, I'll oversee the completion of this project myself.

  Mr. Fergueson : You can't fool me, you old windbag! I know Bumstead does all the work.

  Julius Dithers : [shaking his fist and growling]  Why, you...

  Mr. Fergueson : And don't shake your fist at me! Just make that deadline, and there'll be a nice fat bonus in it for you *and* Bumstead.

  [they hang up in unison] 

• Dagwood Bumstead : [to the sandwich vendor]  Give me a ham and cheese, onion, pastrami, turkey, bacon, Swiss, and mackerel sandwich, would ya? Oh, and uh, hold the pickle.

  [turning to Daisy] 

  Dagwood Bumstead : Gotta watch the old waistline, ya know?

  [the vendor gives him his sandwich] 

  Dagwood Bumstead : Ah, that's better.

  [walking away] 

  Dagwood Bumstead : C'mon, girl, let's get to work.

• Dagwood Bumstead : [carrying a tower of presents home]  When you can't find that something special, go for bulk.

• Dagwood Bumstead : [on his walkie-talkie]  Alexander, are you with me?

  Alexander Bumstead : [at his computer, with headphones and mike]  Right here, Dad.

  Dagwood Bumstead : All right, now pay attention, son. My men say we can probably meet this deadline but *only* if we get these supplies in soon.

  Alexander Bumstead : Fire away!

  Dagwood Bumstead : Three thousand counterflange bolts, five hundred truckloads of quickset cement, one hundred thirty tons of alloy support girders...

  Alexander Bumstead : Consider 'em on their way, Pop!