A Bunch of Amateurs (2008)

Burt Reynolds: Jefferson Steel

Quotes 

• Jefferson Steel : You know what happened to the last director who thought they were smarter than me?

  Dorothy Nettle : They won an Oscar?

• Jefferson Steel : Nigel. You're acting like an ass. If anybody acts like an ass around here it's gonna be me.

• Jefferson Steel : [suggesting a play he might appear in the following year]  How about Richard III?

  Amanda Blacke : Yeah, you're good at sequels.

• Jefferson Steel : Excuse me. So sorry to bother you, Mr Steel.

  [hands him a piece of paper and a pen] 

  Stewardess : No problem, honey. Who shall I sign it to?

  Jefferson Steel : The United Kingdom Immigration Department. It's your landing card.

• Jefferson Steel : Then Richard III it is. What's that about again?

  Dorothy Nettle : It's about power and seduction.

  Jefferson Steel : Well, I'll have to do some research.

• Jefferson Steel : [after his fellow actors have been introduced to him]  I don't recognize any of these people. I mean, where is Judi Dench? Where's Kenny Branagh? Just throw in one of the Redgraves.

  Dorothy Nettle : All otherwise engaged, I'm afraid.

• Jefferson Steel : I need to talk to the director.

  Dorothy Nettle : You are.

  Jefferson Steel : You are the director?

  Dorothy Nettle : Yes, I am.

  Jefferson Steel : I thought you were the driver.

  Dorothy Nettle : Well, I'm that too.

  Verity Nettle : She's also playing the fool.

• Jefferson Steel : She's in anaphylactic shock. You're going to need adrenaline, a laryngoscope, ventilatory support.

  Doctor : Are you a doctor?

  Jefferson Steel : No, but I played one in a movie.

• Dorothy Nettle : Do you deliberately set out to offend people?

  Jefferson Steel : No, it just comes natural.

  [smiles and greets a good looking young woman passing them in the street] 

  Dorothy Nettle : [under her breath]  Except when they are pretty blondes.

• Jefferson Steel : I rest my case.

  Nigel Dewberry : Well, I defer to the director.

  Dorothy Nettle : [stammering]  I... eh... I think there is a definitive performance lying somewhere between Californian realism and English mellifluence.

• Jefferson Steel : I'm leaving.

  Nigel Dewberry : Not before me.

  [Both run to the door, Nigel Dewberry reaches it first, leaves, and slams the door behind him] 

  Jefferson Steel : I can slam the door... *louder*!

• Jefferson Steel : I told you it works better in a bigger venue.

  Dorothy Nettle : You really are mad.

  Amanda Blacke : What's the point of being a movie star if you can't hire the Old Vic for a few nights?

• [First lines] 

  Girl on Motorbike : [On the screen of a cinema]  That was one hell of a bang.

  Jefferson Steel : [On the screen of a cinema]  You ain't seen nothing yet.

  [passionately kisses the girl on the back of his bike] 

  1st Cinema Girl : Ewww. That is so gross.

  2nd Cinema Girl : He is *so* old.

  1st Cinema Girl : I know. She could be, like, his granddaughter.